i am a mother of 4 boys ages now are 18 he has graduated and moved out on his own...then i have a 16 yr old son soon to be 17 then i have a 14 yr old son soon to be 15 then a 13 yr old son soon to be 14. my ex left us back in nov 1996 i had the children in my custody ever since....when he left i told him i was keeping custody of the boys so he told me fine and then i said about going for child support he told me if i did that then he would give up all his rights to the boys i didnt know the law so i thought he could then so i said fine cause i didnt want to be the blame for him not being in his kids life so i asked him what he could afford he said 50 aweek so he paid that when he did for 10 1/2 yrs till may 2006 i sued him for child support then he turned around and sued me for full custody ....none of our sons wants to live with him . he left his 2nd wife back in 2004 she was 5 months pregnant and they also have a 2 yr old son at that time .he went to a bar and never went home ...he left her for his new gf. well they live in a 3 bedroom well the gf has a son and a daughter the son is 10 the little girl is 6 they sleep in the same room the other women is a stranger she is handicapped living in the 3rd bedroom he has no rooms for my sons they sleep on the floor and couches . i have to go by the custody agreement made from 1997 when he left ,the kids were toddlers they do not want this set up no more . i have legal services tellin me i can not change this arrangement cause he is sueing me for full custody. well we went to a modified hearing we were both ordered to pay 1050 i paid he didnt he asked the judge to give him 6 months to come up with it which will take us to april 2007 ..since then he had moved from his 2 bedroom in new phila .to a three bedroom four blocks from where we live the boys asked me to do something about the visitation they only want to see him now on a saturday from like 9 to 6pm . i am being told by alot of ppl the kids will get to talk to the judge for my ex is telling the boys he has already won and they will be living with him and they have no choice? what do you think ? is it true?
2007-02-02 02:54:52 · 8 answers · asked by tinalee1972 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I live in Pa and I heard that if a child is over the age of 13, they can choose which parent they want to live with. Other than that, I would talk to a lawyer and bring up the fact that your ex cannot hold a family together and that you feel that it would be in your children's best interest to stay with you. Also, talk to your boys and tell him that he has not won yet. Tell them not to listen to anything he says till the judge smackes the gavel.
Also I wanted to add.... Tell your kids not to take him serious if he trys to threaten them or you. You don't want them to be frighten into staying with him. He is telling them that they have no say because he knows that they have a choise and he just wants to hurt you. Good luck hun, I hope you win!!!!
2007-02-02 03:17:25 · answer #1 · answered by toothfairy.2006 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need a lawyer.
Who has full custody of the boys?
What is the visitation arrangement? If you haven't had a Court Order changed to reflect your children's wishes, you must follow that order. If you don't follow the court order then you are in breach and your ex can take you to court for that. Use the system to your advantage and have your children's voiced heard. Good luck!
http://www.mbfamilylaw.com/CM/FSDP/PracticeCenter/Family-Law/Child-Custody-and-Visitation.asp?focus=overview
2007-02-02 04:20:36 · answer #2 · answered by doodles 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i have delt with visitation in my life , and in my case my son was also older and was able to voice his oppinion in court. my advice is to make sure you have a good list of your ex husbands track record with moving alot , leaving wives and other children and his record of actual support of the children (money and emotional) in the past , and maybe if he has been a active father (showing up at right times and dates of visitation)...it all goes to show how serious he is , and that he is really only doing it for the payment he doesnt want to pay.good luck!
2007-02-02 03:56:35 · answer #3 · answered by vinnieangel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I went through a similar situation (me being the child) and I did talk with the judge and it came down to my decision. this was in MA in 1986 so I don't know if they do it the same way now?
2007-02-02 03:04:06 · answer #4 · answered by mayhem 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
in the beginning if his new grlf has any form of welfare and/or low lease housing it not suited for a infant over 5 to be sharing a rm w/a grl and u can use that against him. permit the decide be attentive to how he consistently leaves the youngsters and ladies individuals in his existence and how he does not pay for the welfare of the youngsters and or families he create.to boot i think of the youngsters are the right age to talk and the attorneys will additionally enable them to talk and that they gets to pay attention the newborn's emotions and techniques on there father.......do not concern honey have confidence and u have God on your section this criminal bondage will subside and pray approximately it the guy upstairs needs u to be humble so pray on your knees.U are blessed to have those infants on your existence so do your ultimate 2 carry them tight. U WILL WIN!!!!
2016-09-28 07:56:06 · answer #5 · answered by barile 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since your boys are older, and almost adults, they can tell the judge themselves what's going on. Most likely the judge will listen and agree with them. Don't fear too much dear, he probably won't win.
2007-02-02 03:40:21 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i am sorry that you have to go throu this. I am not a person that knows the law, but i do believe that your children will have a say in it. They are old enough that they should know what they want. Good luck!!!
2007-02-02 03:00:54 · answer #7 · answered by bdmrplemons 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
They get to talk to a Judge and he will listen to what they say. He will do what he thinks is best for them.
2007-02-02 03:01:52 · answer #8 · answered by kitkat 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋