Being accepted as agnostic?

Question

I'm 14 and my family feels strongly about being christians and they're very religious I guess you could say.... I'm agnostic/atheist and there's no way in heck I would tell them... They act like if your not a christian your scum or something. I'm getting so sick of my mother saying don't do that its not christian-like when it's not even my religion! I'm forced to go to church also. I don't know what to do. I'm sick of having to follow rules of a religion im not a part of. Any suggestions? I'm just really frustrated. I was hoping someone could understand where I'm coming from.

Answer 1

My heart goes out to you... my email address is there if you want to talk to someone who shares your frustration. (my family was cool, but this country is pretty delusional)

It's really too bad you can't tell them; I highly recommend telling them someday, but I can see a lot of good arguments for waiting until you are out of the house, on your own. If you are lucky, things will be easier for you when you tell them, but it is very likely that you will make their life harder and more stressful.

In most regards, it is the parent that is more experienced than the child, and it is the parent's job to teach. Try to look at this role-reversal as a chance to grow. Perhaps (and I hate to advocate deception in a matter like this) you can start gradually... occasionally make the claim that you feel it is a good thing for one to question one's faith, and that faith cannot grow stronger without introspection.

In general, it is going to be helpful to you to learn your case and to approach interaction in a mature and emotionally calm manner. If they are Creationists, this will help matters because the case is shut on Creation. Check out talkorigins.org for all the arguments you need.

Answer 2

So I'm agnostic as well. To most Christians that's the same as an atheist.

I went through the same thing and really didn't "come out" to my Mom until I was in my 30's. Once I left for college, it was easy to live the way I wanted to.

Unfortunately, while you live in their house, you'll have to live by their rules. But, if they are good Christians, they should at least hear you out. I'm not sure if you've got too much drama to add any more, but you should be able to talk to your parents. That's what we keep telling our children, so we should live up to it.

Good luck.

Answer 3

No

Because you live in society

When you drive a car you'll want to talk on the cell phone and get there as fast as you can and the Cop will stop you and if you do it too much they will impound your car and take your license away, like happened to an 18 year old I know for six months.

Then the insurance company will charge you twice what they charge everyone else your age because you had a suspended license for breaking the rules.

So, get used to life. It's about EVERYONE telling you what to do from the boss at the office to the janitor and doesn't like cleaning up your willfull messes.

Answer 4

I was just like you once. I hated church with a passion, I thought everyone who was religious was stupid. I was agnostic (with a big leaning towards atheism). I thought when I moved away from home, I'd never go back to church, that I was free.

Know something? When I went back on my own, on my terms, without being forced, I found it to be much better. I think that's what you should do. Give it another chance with an open mind. Actually listen to the priest instead of rolling your eyes in the back pew. Open your heart instead of viewing church as a punishment.

As for your parents, just understand they are passionate about their faith. If you turn atheist, I can guarantee you'd act the same way your mom does, but towards Christians, which doesn't make you any better then she is.

Answer 5

I'm an agnostic/athbeist as well...but I never had to deal withn this....I had it easy...my parents were non-practising. Every now and then we had to go to Synagouge.....I hated it....but I gritted my teeth. If you don't mind some advice....they are your parents...they do love you....and the best course of action for you might be to grin and bear it. You aren;t an adult yet. In a few years you'll be out of the house....doing what you want to do.....and you'll look back with dread...but also fondness. I can't imagine how hard what you must be going through is, but I think you should ALWAYS show your parents respect and love...even if they are making life so difficult for you. I hate to sound patronizing...but you are living under their roof. You aren't an adult.

Answer 6

Well, you're 14. If your parents want you to go to church, you'll probably end up going. But that doesn't mean you have to follow the beliefs. Just go to learn about the religion so you'll have a better understanding of why you want to be agnostic or an atheist. And then when you're older, you'll be able to argue the point with your family.

Answer 7

I'm fourteen too... and yeah, believe me, I've had the same feelings. I don't know everything you're going through though, for me I still believe in Christ cos of my friends...

Anyway I still doubt and I tell you, you need to tell someone. There's no point in being a Christian if you don't want to.

So your family may not accept you, but, hey, time should take care of it. Stay strong, keep safe, and.... I'll pray for you.

Answer 8

Listen you are by no means the first teen to go thru this experience,many things act on our minds and bodies at this age,complex chemicals can cause us to be confused and uncertain about ourselves and we tend to lean towards a rebellious slant, the attractions of the world are also calling to you at this age so you have a lot to contend with,may I suggest that you have your own private relationship with the God Who loves you dearly and weather this storm for awhile for very soon you will be an adult and can do your own thing.

Answer 9

well because of your age, there isnt much you are going to be able to do. just tough it out, there is nothing wrong with living a life of high morals believe in God or not. and by the way....agnostic and atheist is not the same thing.

Answer 10

Be prepared to ignore a lot of idiotic answers to this question.

I think you have to use your own judgement about what to do. It's hard to fully analyze a situation over the internet. Just focus on what you think is right.