My 2 daughters were killed in an auto accident 2 weeks ago.?

Question

I'm looking for anyone who has lost an adult child and interested in knowing how they got through it all. My daughters were 21 and 18. The 21 year old left behind a small daughter. I need help in getting through this, making sense of it all.

Answer 1

I am so sorry for your loss. I lost a baby many years ago, but I can't even imagine losing an adult child.
I think family and close friends need to lean on each other at a time such as this. It's also good to talk about them as much as you want.
There is no sense to this, it's a horrible part of your life's journey. In time you will be able to celebrate the lives of these two beautiful young women,and keep their lights shining, especially for your grand daughter.

Answer 2

I am so sorry for your loss. I just lost a daughter in a traffic accident 2 days before christmas about 6 weeks ago. She was 18. It's very hard to overcome this type of loss. The only way i'm making it through all of this is through almost constant prayer, and spending my time doing things to try and keep my mind off of losing her. Which is very nearly impossible.

Praying to the lord, and time will be the only way to overcome these tradgedies. Life is hard, as i just lost my mother in law on thursday night and we bury her on Saturday afternoon.

One thing i do find comfort in knowing is simply these loved ones we have lost are in a far better place than where we find ourselves.

They are free of the evil wicked world in which we live today. They are with God and serving him and is under his care now.

Answer 3

Your written English is a little bit confusing and hard to follow but I understood what you mean. Ok First of all I ' m going to tell you how I don't understand your logic: If your husband cheated on you, WHAT THE HELL are you still doing with him ?? Ever heard of a DIVORCE ?? I know divorce can be expensive sometimes but at least you have gone your separate ways you would still be married but separated. Don't you have any respect for yourself that you'd stay with a cheating man or are you so hopelessly in love that you can't leave him no matter what he does ? Second of all: I'm going to talk to you about your son. What he is doing is called INCEST it is not normal to be sexually aroused by his mother. But I have NO IDEA in which your husband's cheating is related to your son's behavior right now !! There is absolutely NO LINK between the two situation which are very different. What you are talking is not relevant. I'll inform you that it is NORMAL for a 14 year-old boy to be sexually aroused and masturbate...but NOT WITH HIS OWN MOTHER. When a teenager is expressing sexual attraction towards one member of his family: mother, sister, brother, cousin whatever...You NEED to seek medical help as there is some mental disorder. A boy this age will be aroused by his classmate, his neighbor, his girlfriend, even a woman your age but NOT his own mother. Talk to your son , ask him what is going through his mind and why he's doing that. Tell him you are his mother, not a random woman on the street. tell him sexual intimacy between blood relatives is SICK and WRONG. I suggest you consult a good psychiatrist.

Answer 4

Oh God, I'm so sorry for your loss. Although I haven't lost any of my children in a car accident, that is my biggest fear. My heart goes out to you.

My best friend lost her 26 year old brother on new years day. He was on a motorcycle and a car hit him. It was and still is very devastating. She and her parents have been going to a grief counselor and it's helping. It's going to be a long healing process and I don't know if one can fully recover from a tragedy like that, but you can at least find some strength to keep going for you and your grandchild's sake.

I would suggest seeing a grief counselor and maybe finding a support group in your area or a church for help in grieving and healing.

Again, I'm truly sorry for your loss. You will be in my prayers. God bless.

Answer 5

You will never make sence of this, and you will never get your question answered "why", things happen for some reason, and people get hurt. Right now you have a grand-daughter, that lost a mommy.She needs her grand mother, so you need to take care of yourself. You are going to miss your girls everyday, for the rest of your life. You are not a bad person if you smile today, or even laugh. It doesn't mean you have forgotten them, that you will never do. You can attend a church in your community, and let faith help you with this. But you will heal, but it takes time. You have to except what has happened, and that there are no straight answers. Just enjoy your grand daughter, she needs you now! My thoughts are with you!

Answer 6

I lost my son and I did not handle it very well so I can tell you what not to do. First of all everyone gave me pills, my doctor, my mother, etc, so I did not face my grief. My sisters packed up all his stuff and put it away the same day.
Then I tried all kinds of things to divert myself from it that got me me into trouble and eventually ruined my marriage to the love of my life.

Loosing your child is the worst thing that can happen to you, in my opinion, and two, well I can't imagine what you are going through. Don't let people sweep it under the rug because it is to painful. Cry, scream, get it out, DON'T bottle it up like I did. It took me years to deal with it. 15 years later I finally had a precious little girl, you have your grandchild. Things are gonna be very hard, but over time it will get a little easier.

You can write me if you want, I know the grief of loosing a child and I will listen to anything you need to say. My son was just a baby so no one wanted to talk about it. My husband never mentioned his name. It made me feel very alone in my sorrow.

Also people used to say the stupidest things like good thing he was only a baby etc. I adored that child with every ounce of me being. Try to just ignore the things people say, they mean well, but it is so hard to find anything right to say at a time like this. My heart goes out to you.

Answer 7

Oh my God, I'm so sorry.
I really think that you should join a group either a self help or parents group of deceased children,
It does help to talk about it, but more helpful with those that have been through it. I have not, and can't even begin to know what you are going through, I really don't think though you will ever make sense of it all,what possible answer could you ever get that would justify taking the lives of two beautiful children?
May God Bless You and Yours, Makes you wonder dosen't it ?

Answer 8

I am so sorry for your loss. There are websites like ivillage and others that have bulletin boards and also support groups you can join, check with your local churches etc to find a support group. The truth is that you will feel the best support from other people who have experienced the same.

Answer 9

reading your heading made me cry. i am so sorry. it's so hard to lose both at once. i lost my great aunt a day ago and i don't know how to take i don't even know how to cry. i woke up in a good mood and then my stepmom just told me like that i fell to the floor and cried i almost fell down the stairs ,i couldn't believe it. when my stepmom saw the pain that i was in she told me that it was just a joke and that my great aunt is in the hospital but they don't know if she is going to make it. it made me feel better. but when i called my dad he told me that my great aunt died the day before i heard. i went to my room i screamed i cried. it's hard for me and it must be even worse for you to lose both your children at the same time. i can't imagine the pain you're feeling. i don't know what to say to you ,this is my first experiencing a death in my family. all of the rest i wasn't old enough to understand. but now i'm older i understand i don't know how to deal with it. everyone is here on earth for a reason love everyone single person. life comes and goes,the ones that come you're so happy for them but the ones that go ,you wonder to yourself ,that was the wrong life that left why her or why him. in the end we will all be together love we will. i have to keep saying this it must be so hard for you i can't even imagine. we both lost people very close to us. think of it in this way they're in a better place. with everything they need looking down on you. they are. my condolences go out to you and your family and i wish you all the best.

god bless you love and your family. good luck i will be praying for you.

Answer 10

I lost son of my brother and only son of my sister last October in a road accident. They were both 21 year old. we all family members were very sad and depressed, but my brother faced this very bravely and said I thank God that He gave us him for 21 years and though he was my son but in fact he was a gift from Him and He took back His gift.

My sister who lost her son was initially very sad, but now she is engrossed in 3 year old daughter of her daughter.

I hope you will also face this bravely and you also have grand daugther to look after.

THough this loss cannot be undone, but I pray to God to give you courage. Please take good care of yourself.