Ok my fiance and I have been together for a while now and I have a step daughter who is a full fledged drama queen. Everything has to be her way or all Heck will break out. If she doesn't get it her way she gets this attitude and then tries to put a guilt trip on her father and I. I don't want to be too strict but I'm too the point of giving up, I don't know what to do anymore. Also is she doesn't have her way, the one thing the bugs me really bad, she calls her grandmother and tells her and then Her father, her grandmother, and I end up in this big fight!! Please help I don't know what to do anymore!! Any suggestions???? THANKS!!
2007-02-01 20:56:13 · 10 answers · asked by themysteriousmami24 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Therapy, therapy, therapy. I don't envy your position. The hardest thing to do would be to sit down with your fiancee and tell him that the way his daughter is behaving is playing havoc with your personal relationship with him. Tell him that if he can't straighten his daughter's behavior out, you don't want to be responsible for the job. After all, she is HIS daughter. How old is the girl-is she old enough to have a sit down talk with her? And if she isn't, then her Father should lay down some ground rules for her. But first and foremost, do NOT compromise your standards to make her accept you.
2007-02-01 21:08:41 · answer #1 · answered by honyb50 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would have an heart to heart talk with your fiance. The fact is he has to put his foot down and speaking with his mother is a must. She needs to understand that her granddaughter is purposefully causing problems in your relationship. When the daughter calls Nana Nana should say, honey I understand your frustration, but I know you and your father can work this out. The fact is you are not her step mother and you shouldn't be involved too heavily regarding her discipline. The grandmother needs to stay out of it and stop letting a child cause arguments in your home. If this can not be resolved I would re-think this marriage because like it or not he is a package deal. Lastly, if the father is not willing to handle his mother, this is another issue that if not handled before the marriage, will clearly end the marriage anyway.
2007-02-01 22:01:49 · answer #2 · answered by aprildin 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think as a person she is jealousy of your relationship with her father and she is feeling as though you are taking something away from her by staying with the father,talk to your fiance so that you can both talk to her and make her understand that you will all be happy as one family and not two separate families being forced by situations to stay put.
Something else if she is on her teens try and understand her coz her body is under goinng great changes nad at this point yound pple tend to act wierd even to their real mums.
Last but not least if this behaviour doesnt change even after talking to her then pliz take her to professional councellors.
Goodluck ma dear
2007-02-01 21:08:49 · answer #3 · answered by dorica w 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not her mother and never will be, she is just making sure you know this. Don't try to be, let her dad let her know and understand he will always love her, and not any less because he is with you now. She's feels threatened and insures her place with these tantrums. Let her know there is no need for it. How old is she, take drastic measures and give her the silent treatment and when she breaks talk to her and let her know you would rather be her friend not a wedge between her and her dad. After that any misbehavior is misbehavior and should be punished accordingly preferably by the dad.
2007-02-01 21:13:02 · answer #4 · answered by ScrapAddict 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
honestly i also don't know what to do but maybe you should tell your fiance about her daughter in a nice way you should also tell him how it all affects you. explain to him the situation without sounding like you hate his daughter but instead hurt bcoz of the situation. maybe both of you should also create a solution where everyone has to compromise. probably his daughter feels that she's out of the picture thats why she grabs everyone's attention. a good and honest
communication with your soon to be family is really important considering you'll be living with her once you got married and it would be more diffucult if you just prolong you're situation.
2007-02-01 21:24:18 · answer #5 · answered by alias 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
quite a typical reaction for kids who will get a new mom or dad. if she's still not a teener then give more room on your patience but if she's about 15 or 16 then talk it out w/ her and your fiance. If you won't deal with it as soon as you can it may end up you won't get to the altar.
2007-02-01 21:17:22 · answer #6 · answered by iris 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to stay out of the middle of this. Her dad needs to step up and be strong with her and get her to stop acting like the 3 year old brat. Her dad also needs to explain to her that you're going to have some authority over her, or you'll never get any ground with her.
Get your fiance to man up.
2007-02-01 21:01:10 · answer #7 · answered by tony1athome 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No she is not your kid but if you are gonna be a part of her life which you have been then she needs to learn to respect you...have a talk with her father about this and then all 3 of you guys need to sit down and have a talk about it or go to some couseling...
2007-02-01 21:41:07 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
when u hav taken the decision of having married again(as u r saying ur fiance) then why do u bother about ur EX-family members.everyone should have his/her personal life.dont let anyone in ur personal life-in ur happiness.u should talk to them clearly that u r having a nnew relation and dont want any disturbance in it.she is doing all these to have a fight with ur EXs so just dont listen to her and be urself,be happy and go ahead for ur new life dont lok behind.
2007-02-01 21:12:17 · answer #9 · answered by StylishT 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First of all, this isn't your kid. Treat yourself to an afternoon in "I don't give a **** ville" while her daddy decides when the final straw has regressed the situation to a spanking. On the other hand, if she's cute and can pass for 18, send her my way and I'll teach her a thing or two.
2007-02-01 21:13:46 · answer #10 · answered by Mr. Questions 1 · 0⤊ 3⤋