Since I had twins, My 10 year old and seem to revert back to being 5 years old. Takes him 2 hours to go to bed. He finds every excuse in the book to stay up and/or complains about everything. What do I do. We don't end up going to bed till 1am. I'm at a lost. Any ideas?
2007-02-01 19:39:55 · 11 answers · asked by pixiewe 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
Could be that he has just tested the limits and realizes he can get away with more. And you're letting him get away with it. Don't put up with that. When it's time for bed, get him to bed right away. Or if he's taking 2 hours, start a bedtime routine 2 hours earlier. This isn't fair to you, and may start causing problems for him for school in the long run. Plus when you go to get your new babies on a decent schedule you will have to deal with him as well...This is something you need to deal with now, before it gets worse. You might also consider involving him with the twins so he doesn't feel totally left out and is more willing to be co-operative than rebellious.
2007-02-01 19:56:43 · answer #1 · answered by Cyndi Storm 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe he feels left out and not getting enough attention since the twins take up a lot of your time. try getting him to help out once in a while with the twins. you might also try giving him a later bedtime say 30 minutes later if he is good and goes right to bed and has no problem getting up and if that doesn't work then he will have to go to bed early. also if the twins are up and not going to bed he may feel that its not fair. trying talking to him and asking what he thinks about it and see if he thinks it is fair that way he will feel more involved with making the decision and feel more grown up.
2007-02-02 01:24:29 · answer #2 · answered by panther 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your 10 year may just be experiencing a little jealousy or simply feel left out. I remember when I was young I had a really hard time when my mother went back to work. I felt like she didint have quality time for me anymore and it worried me and stressed me out.
I think talking to your son about this would help a lot. He is old enough to sit down and discuss things with. Also, you could come up with ONE special thing that you two do together, like a movie with just you two on sunday afternoons, or a project that you can work on every night for 30 minutes. If he knows that you have something special just between the two of you he will look forward to it and also not feel like he needs to get your attention by refusing to go to bed.
goodluck!!
2007-02-01 23:40:45 · answer #3 · answered by rachie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Make some special time for him-1 hour of mommy time or daddy time or take a day on the weekedn to something that he just wants to do.
It seems he is having a hard time adjusting to the twins.
Maybe he feels left out, not that you are doing it, but from a 10 year old view.
2007-02-02 02:44:29 · answer #4 · answered by Willow 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my ten yr old daughter acts out like that... I thought it was jealousy, needing to be reminded/reassured that I love her... she needs tends to be "needy" as in she needs almost constant reassurance.... she does not do it every night.. only when she sees me actively playing with a baby who is teething or sick... only when my attention is needed elsewhere.... I try to nip that by having her read to me a little extra... anticipate that she "might" act out, and start the bedtime routine an hour earlier... and just keep her busy at my side, helping with baby even and praising every little positive I can.... she tends to be more "upbeat" and we do not see a fit for a few days... and I can retrace.. when it starts going down hill for her tends to always be when I have not been able to give her that "extra" attention.... her ped. said that it is perfectly normal some children just need that little extra hug (or twenty) when new baby comes home to reassure their "spot" in the family.. cause of the changes....
maybe it is as simple (and difficult) as that fo ryou too
hope this is of some help
good luck
2007-02-02 01:24:01 · answer #5 · answered by elusive_001 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like hes jealous of the new editions. My 8 year old has done the same thing since her sister was born. It takes time for them to get used to the idea of sharing mommy.Lots of 1 on 1 time and speacial things for just him and mom. An lots of hugs and kisses goes a long ways.
2007-02-01 21:27:22 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It may have nothing to do with your having the babies. It could just be his age and/or the fact that now he's feeling like a really big kid and try to take some liberties.
I think you should talk calmly to him, tell him he cannot take two hours to go to bed; and if he does he will not be allowed out after school (or have something that means something to him taken away). Unless, of course, he wants to start getting ready for bed at 7:30 in order to have two hours before he must go to bed at 9:30.
I'd say something like, "Look. - You're making our home like a nut house by being up until one and keeping the rest of us up that late to boot. You can't do that. You have school, and you're going to flunk or get me in trouble if anyone guesses you're not getting enough sleep. You have your choice of going into bed at 9 and reading until 9;30 or going to bed at 9:30 on the dot and just going to sleep without reading. If you're not sleepy pretend you are; because unless you're sick I don't want to see you popping out of your room after 9:30.
I will not have my house turned into a nut house because a little ten-year-old doesn't want to go to bed. I don't ask much of you, but you are going to go by this one rule because you have no right to be doing what you are doing these days.
If you do this one more time you will not go out after school, and if you keep doing this I am going to bring you to a psychiatrist to see what is making you do what you're doing because it isn't normal."
2007-02-01 21:00:19 · answer #7 · answered by WhiteLilac1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like the kid needs one on one time with you and dad he/she is feeling left out set up some time for your 10 y/o to help with the lil ones set strong limits talk to him/her let them know you understand how he/she feels but this behavior is not OK he she is 10 and can understand right from wrong baby from big kid and that baby's need more than big kids sit down tonight before bed and have a long talk and bore the kid to sleep
2007-02-01 20:25:11 · answer #8 · answered by debrasearch 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to involve him in the new babies routines. Have him help change the babies, feed them, etc. Make him feel important and needed...Also, as difficult as it may be, try to find some time for him and only him. Maybe he's feeling left out and is doing anything he can for attention....even if it's negative....it's attention....
2007-02-01 19:44:54 · answer #9 · answered by been_there_done_that 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
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2016-10-17 04:44:55 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋