My husband has two daughters the oldest- Suzanne.. { She is almost 21 }she verbally abuses him.?

Question

What to do about the verbal abuse that she is giving to my spouse, I am witness to this; and I do not like it; and I don't put up with it. I have told her numberous times to stop, give your father the respect he deserves.

Suzy, my husband daughter; is almost 21 years, and after all these years, she is still verbally abusing him.
She is always chewing her Dad out about something, she is always negative, and so hateful and mean to her Dad.I am very tired of this!!

He never abuses his daughters, he is very supportive and loving to Suzy, to both of his girls. I will definetly tell Suzie to respect my house and my husband. Thanks, guys!!

Answer 1

this is what you tell her..."NO ONE disrespects my husband!!" put your foot down and tell her that you don't care whatever relationship she and her father has....that is between father and daughter and none of your business, BUT whoever disrespects your husband WILL have to answer to you!

you make it clear to her that she will not talk to your husband that way as you will not tolerate any disrespect to the man you are married to....and whoever disrespects your husband, disrespects you and is not going to be welcome in your home!!

sweetie, do not plead or beg this girl to be nice to her father...you DEMAND that while she is in your house, she respects your husband whether she likes it or not. it is not a choice because you will NOT LET ANYONE talk to your husband in a bad way, not while you are alive, not while you can hear it and certainly not in your home or they have to answer to YOU!!!

Answer 2

Suzanne is being very outspoken, isn't she, I have a daughter who is 31 and she is just as bad, if not worse, she has not listened to me since 14 and is still rebellious and rude. Especially in front of my girlfriend. It is embarassing and humilating. She has been on marijauna and the results is she can have schitzofrenic behaviour. I avoid her as much as possible, but always make an effort to take my grandchildren away from her for weekends and give them a break as well. She blames me for her problems, but needs to pick up a mirror and reflect on her attitude and behaviour.
It is hard for you to speak from the outside, because that is where I feel she has placed you.
You could probably ask for her to go out with you to the movies and coffee after, and ask her what is troubling her and what you can do to help her relate better with her father.
Or ask the father to lay the cards on the table and tell her to either respect his authority and love, or move out of the house as it is unsettling for all concerned.
I too had to do this, but there has been the division there as well. But at least she tells me she loves me whenever we talk.
Goodluck

Answer 3

It concerns me with how many people suggest to throw her out. I can't imagine anything my child could do that I would throw her out.

They are right though, you have every right to demand the respect. I wouldn't kick her out, but I would cut off anything she got from me (phone, car, tv, couch).

First, you need your husband to stand beside you on this. You should not be the only one demanding the respect. He should also put his foot down. He has taught her how to treat him for nearly 21 years, it's not going to change over night. It's going to take time and effort on all three parts.

I would tell her (I being my husband and me) that everytime she is mean, cruel, or plain disrespectful, she loses something until she earns it back. She can use anything she brings into the house, but little by little you take away the luxories you and your husband bring in (but not food, water, or electricity). If she wants to watch TV, she better have her own and her own couch or chair to sit on.

I know it sounds crazy, but she will see that what she is doing isn't right. Also, a heart to heart with her and her father would be good. He needs to tell her how he feels when she does it, but he needs to tell her when it's not happening--when they are both calm.

I admire you, blended families are very difficult. . . especially for the step-parent.

Best of luck!

Answer 4

Hi There,It sounds like Suzy has some issues, have you tryed talking to her ? Maybe Suzy resents the fact that her dad has a girlfriend and he's not with her mom anymore.Personally I would stay out of it ,it might cause problems between you and your hubby.Your husband is a grown man ,and he is her father let him deal with it!
Good Luck!

Answer 5

Chances are your husband has let her get away with this since she was little so she keeps doing it cause she can get away with it cause he doesn't do anything about it.

It is your house and you make the rules if she can't respect your husband then tell her she can't come back until she gets some manners and learns to respect her dad.

Answer 6

Actually I believe there is a reason for her to verbally abuse your hubby. Why don't both of you have a talk so that you can understand the cause behind rather than telling her to stop it. Finding the root of the problem is the main solution to resolve this sort of problem

Answer 7

Maybe he has always done the same to her. My father was like that and I don't talk to him anymore. I was wondering what memories I could share at his funeral and there are none, he never spent any time with his daughter, he never had anything but negative things to say. So maybe I will skip the funeral.

Answer 8

If she lives at home tell her to get OUT..I mean do it too.. If she does not live at home tell her until she can be more respectful towards her Dad she is not welcome look you have to nip it in the bud now or he will NEVER get respect from her

Answer 9

It's up to her dad to tell her to stop but if she keeps it up, I think I'd let her know that it's also your house and she is not welcome until she learns some manners.

Answer 10

I wouldnt let her in my house....