My 13 month old is still being rocked to sleep?

Question

My 13 month old daughter is still being rocked to sleep at night. She refuses to lay in her crib and fall asleep. She cries and cries until you get her up. It is even hard to try to rock her, she just wants to stay up, even when she is tired. Any suggestions on how I could help her go to sleep on her own? She has an older brother (2 1/2) and I know she is excited and wants to play, but how do I get her to go to sleep with less fight?

Answer 1

I had this problem with my now 10 year old when he was a baby. I finally found a book that explained why he couldn't seem to get to sleep.
Imagine you have your favorite pillow and blanket in your bed with your preferred feet in or feet out of the covers position...perhaps a ceiling fan or radio in the background. If you had it this way for months or years, if someone were to come in and turn it off so it was dead silent and take the covers off your feet and take your pillow you would wake up. When your little girl goes to sleep YOU trained her to only be able to comfort herself with these things and when she goes to sleep she sleeps fine in the beginning but eventually as her consciousness comes and goes, she becomes aware she is not in her favorite sleepy "spot". Like someone taking her favorite pillow in the middle of the night...she can't get to sleep unless the favorite criteria is followed.
What I had to do is to wean him off me rocking him and teach him that he can comfort himself. I did the altered version of what it said in the book which was the method where you let them cry and check on them after 2 minutes and then again at 5 and then at 10 and then at 15 and then at 20 etc.....(not touching them unless over 2 hours total goes by, but letting them see you and hear your soothing voice) ....until they fall asleep. They advised no bottle to bed with the baby so they won't learn to depend on it.....but considering I nursed him to sleep for so many months...I DID put a sippy cup to bed with him and he lasted with the crying for 2 solid nights of staying up a total of about 2 hours the first 2 nights and the 3rd night 1/2 hour and then 5 minutes and then just a moment of fussing and finally he stayed in bed and put himself down.....He had trained himself to know he could comfort himself to sleep. Afterward he was a dream to put down. Trust your instincts and figure a way that works for you both for her to train herself to know she can comfort herself to sleep.

Answer 2

ILL TELL U WHAT NOT TO DO LET HER CRY SHE GONE SHE GONE THINK U NEVER AROUND WHEN SHE NEED YOU SO THIS IS WHAT YOU SHOULD IS GIVE HER A WARM BOTTLE AND PUT HER IN THE BED BESIDE U AND LAY HER ON HER STOMACH AND PAT HER ON HER BACK THAT'S WHAT I DID NOW MY DAUGHTER IS 12 AND I STOP DOING BEFORE SHE WAS EVEN 1

Answer 3

DEAR YES SHE IS REALLY INSINCERE OK TAKE CARE

Answer 4

had the same problem with my little girl, but kept rocking her til 20 months or so. I just said to her your a big girl now and you have a pretty bed to sleep in. I went cold turkey, let her cry and she did just fine. If you keep rocking her to bed she will not learn how to put her self to sleep, and when she wakes up in the middle of the night too! good luck, just be patient.

Answer 5

i am sure you have heard...let her cry it out. i am not going to tell you that. it's ok to rock her to sleep, i still rock my daughter until she is just about ready to fall asleep and then i lay her in bed. she is 14mo. the best thing to do is have a routine established, dinner, bath, change into PJ's, snack, brush teeth, prayers/book, rock, and then bed. make sure these are at roughly the same time every night. snack should not have a lot of sugar in it, sometimes warm milk or warm apple cider works just as well. keep the lights in the house low (i just turn the one over the stove on since we live in an apt that is an open design) by creating an environment that doesn't allow either child to run and play will help. on the nights that my daughter seems extra cranky, i like to use lavender scented bubble bath and lotion, the smell of lavender and chamomile are soothers. i put the lotion on her right before PJ's, and then with the lights down low, i will turn on some classical music or sing lullabies while rocking her. there are times that it has taken what seems like forever, but it does work. i hope this helps, good luck

Answer 6

Sounds like my little girl. Its NOT a bad habit. Its the best gift you can give her. Spending that time with her. I agree onlaying down next to her in a twin bed for her...the toodler beds may be a little snug. And slowly move out of the room. It will happen. Good for you for not letting her cry!

Answer 7

Sounds like she needs a special stuffed animal to sleep with or a "lovey" (blanket). With my daughter, I put musical aquariums in her crib and she could put them on and play them as much as she wanted, until she fell asleep. She still falls asleep on her own.
She does want to be rocked now since she has a younger brother, but 5 - 10 minutes is all it takes, then I lay her down, she rolls over, I cover her and her stuffed animal, and she goes to sleep. Develop a consistent routine. That's what they crave.

Answer 8

It is time to get hard. Rocking is nice for bonding but tiring for you as a mom. What did you do with the first one? Crying is normal when changes are made. But this is the worst that can happen. Let her cry but peep in and give her words of comfort and then leave again. Repeat this a few nights. Try keeping sleep time at home for a month or so. No baby died of crying. They won't resent you because they wont remember later. The later you leave this the worse your situation becomes. Be firm, and brave. Time yourself. Say you allow 10 minutes of crying today, then tomorrow increase it a bit and so on. But always go in and reassure that you are around. (NO PICKING UP!!!!!!!!!) just let her hear your voice and touch her face or back. If she reaches out, ignore it lovingly. Always smile, but be firm. Stick to a routine. Let everyone else (like your husband) know your plan. He must assist you and comfort you cause there will be lots of tears around. I used to cry when I did it with my daughter. Within a week she got the idea, crying was less, but still she disliked what I was doing. But she knew this was how things were going to work from then. Never change the rules unless there is danger. Keeping you in my prayers. Children are adorable hey. Just keep going. You'll be fine!

Answer 9

My Jasmín was the same way. I had a bedtime routine for her. Her bedtime was about 8:30/9pm so around 7pm I would give her dinner with the volume of the t.v turned down slightly. At 8:30, bathtime with no noise at all just me talking to her while bathing her. I found that using Johnson and Johnson's chamomile bath soap really helped to wind her down. After the bath I would get her dressed and lay her in her crib, say nite-nite, say a prayer, give her 'hermanita' her little baby doll that she called little sister, turn on some light music, and leave the room. Children learn by repetition and they find comfort in it. If you establish a nightly routine with her when it comes time for nite-nite she'll be ready.

Answer 10

I like the first answer. She needs to know you are nearby. Plus, she may need the rocking motion to soothe her. Try playing soft classical music. It might help if her brother was went to bed at the same time.

Answer 11

The more YOU pick her up the longer it is going to take her to learn to fall asleep on her own. Let her cry it out. Eventually she will go to sleep.