Marrage and Religion?

Question

My boyfriend/best friend is Greek Orthadox. I love him very much and have for most of my life and we want to get married in a few years time.

I have seen My big Fat Greek Weddinng heaps.

He is very set on having our wedding in a church. I'm not religious, I have never been inside a church, and my whole family are not religious. I don't think they would be comfortable being in a greek church (my family are not greek). I have never been in a church mainly because my family are very against Christianity (also someone punched my mother in the face and broke her nose one day she was forced to go to Sunday School)

I love him very much but I don't want to get married in a church. He says I have to get baptised. All this stuff is all strange to me, but he's set on having it in a church. His family aren't very religious, they go to church once a year (Greek Easter)

Any suggestions of what I can do? I've already compromised a lot in our relationship. I love him very much. Please help!

Answer 1

One thing you can do is have 2 ceremonies-my brother did that. He and his wife are Mormon, and the wife's family isn't, so they had 2 ceremonies--one in the church and one in the temple (and actually, one in a regular, rented hall). You might want to at some point make sure you come to some sort of agreement on religion, though, because when you have kids, it'll start all over again and then the kids (especially in their teens) get all confused. Take your time, though. No reason to rush! Good Luck!

Answer 2

Depends on how much you and him care about getting married in a church. Will you absolutely refuse to? Can you offer him a better suggestion such as on a beach or on a mountain or somewhere else really special to hold the ceremony?
If you don't want to get baptized tell him straight out. It sounds like he doesn't know what you believe religiously, and you should be honest with him, the sooner the better. If you let it go to long, it will cause worse problems down the road. Keep it real.

Answer 3

Just think this moment as many moments of your future life if you get married with him, all your life have to face it with church stuff, holidays, his family , your family, put them together will be hard, If you are a family people that will hurt you a lot, that his family and your family has nothing to talk about, think on every single holiday, your children getting baptizes, think think think.....
You can change of your religion if you want But that is your own personal desicion, out of what happen to your mother and some of those will be easier to manage for the next years with your bf, but consider marriage now? that you are not baptize? I'm not sure.

Answer 4

Unequally yoked!

If you don't believe in God, he does... your marriage will have a big strain in the center of it from day one. I'm surprised you have stayed together this long.

One can't be baptized unless they truly believe in Christ Jesus. The act of being baptized would be a mockery of God. Don't do it unless you truly feel in your heart that Christ is Lord. Don't do it just because your b/f tells you to do so.

Don't allow the violent act of a child (assuming here your mother was a child at the time) punched your mother in the nose, stop you from finding Jesus.

Remember, the man is the head of the household, like Jesus is the head of the church.

Marriage doesn't have to take place in a church setting. You can have it in a garden setting, along the shores of the ocean.

When and if you marry, are you going to take the vows from scripture?

Answer 5

I know the Orthodox have their beliefs, but this is what the Bible says.:

1 Corinthians 7
12To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. 13And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. 14For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.

15But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. 16How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?

SO basically, if you marry him, he can never divorce you but you could divorce him without it being an issue, because you would be classified under unbeliever status. what they are trying to do here is to minimize divorce. If he loves you and you love him, you will understand eachother's needs. and if that is something he needs then you should have a long talk about it WITH HIM.

Answer 6

Either Elope and get married in Las Vegas or go through with the wedding or tell your parents that it will only be a one day affair and after that they will not be obligated again until the baptisms of your children.

Answer 7

maybe you could try compromising, you obviously care deeply for him. i think he would be much more committed if you went ahead and got baptized before the wedding.
this does not mean that you have to take his religion for fact (i'm also a non-religious person), it just means that you are willing to get baptized to continue your relationship.
because if i'm not mistaken, greeks can't marry non-greeks.

Answer 8

You posted this earlier too. I don't know how to answer you but put it this way... if he really loved you, he wouldn't be trying to change you.

Love doesn't solve everything. Mutual respect and understanding mean more. And, if he's trying to force you to do something you don't want to do and feel in your heart is wrong, then he isn't doing either of those.

If he doesn't back off and you're not a weak woman, then your marriage will be over quick.

You deserve better. Everyone does.

Answer 9

If you've compromised, why can't he compromise? Why can't you get married outside in a garden, but have a greek orthodox priest/father/whatever marry you two? I think if he loves you, he'll try to make you happy as well.

Answer 10

He could agree to a magistrate but why is it so horrible to be in church? It wont hurt you I promise.. Marriage is about compromise. i wouldnt wait more than 18 mos if youre sure..