Ive been dating this guy for over a month...he says things after we sleep together like "only you"...he is very romantic, everytime he goes out of the country for his job he brings me back gifts...he cares if im happy or not...he got really embarrassed and said he wanted to say something and just said "do you know how much i really like you?" he asked me at the beginning where i saw myself in 5 years, questions like that...his fascination has sort of tapered, yet he is def. still interested...however, he is 33, has a myspace...says he feels like 25 (hes mexican and very successful)...im 25 and successful as well...i said i dont want to define our relationship, he said he felt comfortable with that...he has called us everything from "just friends" to "im happy i have you"...im confused...guys, girls...does he like me, is he using me bc im young, sometimes he looks/talks about other girls either in person or celebrities...i joke about guys sometimes...but never until after he does that
2007-02-01 15:48:08 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If you truly think your being played you probably are, it sounds to me like he likes you just as a !*&% buddy. If he liked you more he would have done something about it
2007-02-01 15:55:10 · answer #1 · answered by f_jayce 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Doesn't the "not knowing" just irritate you to no end? Been there, done that! Yuck! i am kind of surprised that you said the fascination is tapering after only a month. i would say give it two more and see. i have found that guys, if they are just playing games, cannot hold onto their fascade for more than about 3 months. If after 3 months he still does not want to "define" your relationship, move on. You can do better and you will not have wasted years finding out. Oh, incidently i am 36 and have a MySpace page...hee hee. And i don't feel a day over 23! Best wishes!
2007-02-01 15:58:32 · answer #2 · answered by fair blue 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your both scared of saying what you really mean.
Communication, communication, communication, is the key. Your both "dancing" around the topic and your both agreeing for the sake of aggreeing.
Your worried he may say something to upset you if you ask the wrong question and he is worried to ask you the wrong question incase you feel badly or something as well.
Tell him its important. Tell him you were worried about asking but now you know what you want. Tell him exaclty what your looking for and what you need and expect from him Its the only way. Ask him what he expects from you, promise each other that if there is answers one of you doesnt like you wont get upset, even if it means he has been sleeping with other women. It is both your faults that no one knows whats going on!
If you had bad comunication and it was clearly both your faults, you cant blame him for sleeping around, unless he said he wasnt specifically. and then did so.
If you had the communication in the first place you would know where you stood with each other. He is probably just as scared as you are, he probably wants to be with you but desnt know how to say it, thats why he says sweet things like that.
your 25 and sucessful, so I know you can do this, dont be scared, nothing to be scared of, I promise when youve done it youll feel so much better and you will wonder what all the fuss was about.
Write to him, call him, do it in person, just do it!
Good Luck
Peace.x
2007-02-01 16:00:45 · answer #3 · answered by Kira 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to sit down and talk with him. You need to have a candid conversation when both of you are relaxed. I say this only because previously you stated you didn't want to define your relationship. A guy will always feel comfortable with this because there are no established boundaries and it so casual. You have to renegotiate because you do want a definitive relationship.
FYI: I think a five to seven age year difference is common and I don't think he's using you.
2007-02-01 16:01:14 · answer #4 · answered by Sweetgirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, you seem to have some commitment issues yourself. when he asked you where you see the relationship in 5yrs, you didn't give a clear answer. he could be picking these vibes up from you--vibes like you may be looking to move on. if so, his confusing actions might result from not wanting to get hurt if you do leave him. maybe he's trying to convince himself (and maybe you) that he's not that attached by saying you're just friends and by mentioning other girls. i think you should really consider what you want out of this relationship, and if you want in for the long haul, then let him know and see if his behaviour changes. if it doesn't then get out of there ;)
2007-02-01 15:56:01 · answer #5 · answered by nobu_abe87 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
GIRL, he sounds like the SAME dude I am dealing with and I just found out he is married! He fed me bullshit lies like "estoy enamorado de ti, I want to get to know only you, I love you, te quiero mucho blah blah blah..." and then I fell for him and found out from a friend he is married. I had no idea, and after I find out he denies it and still tries to pursue me. I'm not saying this guy is the same way..but everything you have told me sounds SO similar! good luck girl and be careful...he sounds like he may have a wandering eye...and make sure he doesn't have a secret family.
Good luck!
2007-02-01 15:55:43 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is using you real good. He is not going to marry you. ever.
2007-02-01 15:53:59 · answer #7 · answered by Iqbal 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wellcome to the club
2007-02-01 15:53:32 · answer #8 · answered by fo6a 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
welcome to the world of love
2007-02-01 16:42:17 · answer #9 · answered by HULK 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋