Relationship Crisis........any solutions?

Question

My girlfriend and i have been dating for about 2 years. up until this point we have been very serious and have done a mediorcre job of keeping the flame alive, she's 19 and im 21, not a big gap but were still youung and both need that passion. my girlfriend's sister has recently been baptized as an advent christian and as a new convert, she has has done a complete 180 on her lifestyle, no sex, drinking, even no MUSIC. now im not goign to bash the bible in fact my best friend is an advent, but now my GIRLFRIEND is beginnig to follow her sisters path and already she has begun to cut back on our sexual activity! im not a perv but i do love sex and its my way of expression! i have the feeling that this is the beginning of the end of our relationship and this scares me......what can i do? i would take on anyone to keep her next to me...but god? im only human.....should i sacrifice my happiness for my relationship? or suffer the pain of giving up the most important person in my life?

Marriage is not an option for either of us as this point. sex is not the basis to our relationship, our commitment is. sex is one of the ways i enjoy expressing myself and my feelings.

Answer 1

there are other things that are important in a relationship. sex can be lived without. talk to your gf about the advent christian thing. first ask her what is going on and what she wants from you. then tell her what you think. talking is the best way to work things out. i went thru the same thing. my gf was a christian who wouldnt have sex with me. i didn't like it at first, but then i went to her church and it doesn't make you miserable at all to not have sex. there are other things to do with each other. good luck!

Answer 2

I think you should talk to her about how you feel. Ask her how important her beliefs are, and tell her how it's affecting you. If you are honest with her about being afraid that her choice will affect your relationship, she should respect that, and let you know what's going on, and what to expect. I would say that if she really wants to do this, then you should bare with her, if you think she is worth it. But the main thing is to be open and honest about your feelings towards this. Otherwise, if you keep quiet about it, and let it go, you will become unhappy, and it will definitely be the end of your long-term relationship.

Don't let it go so easily, if you have worked hard to get this far.

Ohh, and also, to the person who told you to marry her... that person is ridiculous. She/he will most likely be another contributer to the statistics of divorced people. You're young... don't even think about marriage until you are both out of college, and ready to start a life TOGETHER. You won't even stop changing as a person until you settle down, and find a steady career.... dont let anyone push you in to marriage. You're way too young.

Answer 3

although sex is a part of human nature sometimes we have to fight temptation and the effects that it brings i too had to cut out my physical activity but not by chioce my boyfriend was in a really bad accident that left him semi disabled. dont get it twisted tho, he is functioning properly only he doesnt have the stamina. so i know where ur coming from cuz its been almost a year next month and i often become very frustrated. but if u really love that person u find ways to cope with unfortunate situations. good luck and i hope this helps a little. but dont let the physical side of things ruin what might be the best thing that ever happened to u. if all else fails then do u ur still young

Answer 4

I'm a guy and I agree with you completely. I value love far more than I do lust. Do things together as friends, then work on a romantic relationship. Do you enjoy the same foods, hobbies, concerts, music and theater? It takes time and effort to find out if you are compatible or not. Personally, I like the wonderment and anticipation of a possible romantic relationship.

Answer 5

Dude, hate to put it to you this way, but if sex is the only basis for your relationship - or if you see it as the main basis - then you already don't have a real relationship with her.

If you consider a lesser sex life until you get married as a sacrifice to your happiness, then truly, she is not the girl for you.

Answer 6

Well apparently she has made up her mind. So if you are not happy with her decision which obviously no one can expect you to be. It seems that it was a bit selfish on her part to just up and decide how the relationship is going to progress physically. I would try to talk to her about it and see if this what she really wants or its just a phase.

Answer 7

Marry her. Then there IS no problem. Seriously, you've been together 2 years, you are willing to take on "anyone to keep her next to you" and she's "the most important person in your life". Marry her.---That is, if you really MEAN all those things you are saying and not just giving us lip service.

Answer 8

Your gf is only following her sis's footsteps right, she hasnt converted also rite? So dun you think you can actually speak with her about your inconvenience? In a relationship there has to be some compromise. How to be in love and avoid the physical closeness as well? Its tough and I can sympathize with you.
Gd luck.

Answer 9

`if she is really important 2 u like u said, u'll let her fellow in her dreams, if that's what she wants. be a good boyfriend and support her. the support u will give her will mean everything 2 her. sex isn't that important(2 most guys, it is) but if u really love her u will look beyond the sex.and if have that great cannection, u will see pass it. i hope u do the right thing.
GOOD LUCK...........

Answer 10

You need to talk to her, and be honest. Maybe this is something you could try together. Or explore other ways to be sexual with each other. Don't give up especially if you are serious about her.