I have had small flings etc, but never been in a long term relationship with someone, every other guy has annoyed me. But not this one!!
The weird thing is i can't see myself in one, i like being by myself and having me time and at this point in life couldn't imagine spending all my time with someone. i guess if i like him enough it wouldn't bother me?
I've never had a proper relationship so i guess, i dont know how to be a good girlfriend? Sounds strange but has anyone else been the same?
2007-02-01 11:49:14 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I think everyone should have a independent time in their lives where they learn to love themselves and become secure and happy without the aid of another. Once you accomplish that you will become a better person. A person who can enjoy a healthy and happy relationship at the right time if they choose to.
I spent a numer of years on my own and enjoyed growing as a result of my independence. I'm sure you will be better off than many if and when you choose to share your life with another.
2007-02-01 11:55:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
There is no " good " or "bad" girlfriend. You cannot aspire to either extreme. You are who you are, and being in a good long term relationship is all about learning the similarities and differences that lie within two people. A learning experience.
I can say from personal experience that you cannot force yourself to commit to a relationship. You can pretend to want one, but you and you alone will know when you are ready. It could be any number of things from either you just growing and wanting that kind of relationship - to just even meeting the prodigal "mr.right".
I have had small flings for quite some time as well, or as I refer to it, "Wandering bedpost to bedpost". To go above and beyond your question, please take this advice. Should you decide you rather remain the free spirit you are, be careful with "flings" - In my experience they left me with a hole that becomes very hard to fill.
You may also want to note that you dont have to hop into a "long term relationship" - take things a day at a time and just stay true to how you feel. Don't get caught up in coining terms, and giving labels to things. If you follow your feelings you should do just fine.
Best of Luck to you, and be safe.
-Kirk
2007-02-01 12:00:22 · answer #2 · answered by iamkirk 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hey there i want to tell you that i understan what you are feeling i am sure many of us do... i was just like you i had many little romances and flings etc... but never thought that i would settle down with anyone, untill, i met someone and it was alll good and we kicked it and had a good time together, and i realized i started falling fo rhim then i was scared and i wanted to run and i did but he never gave up on me, he understaood what i was feeling well to make this long story short this was back in 1997 its now 2007 and we have been together, going strong for all this time so you falll in love wether you want to or not just relax and go with it, he just might be the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to you good luck:)
2007-02-01 11:57:31 · answer #3 · answered by brown_eyedgurl22 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I felt just like you did. Alone, I could do anything I wanted, but no one to share it with. I was also totally afraid of the intimacy of a long-term committed relationship. But I met a sweet guy who wanted to marry me and I said YES!!!! I love being married!!!
I'm sure you're an awesome girlfriend! If you think you have questions about your fears - check out the book "He's Scared, She's Scared" - It's a great book!! Best of Luck!:)
2007-02-01 11:53:03 · answer #4 · answered by j b 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yea, I tend to hav alot flings but never a relationship. I guess im king of scared to hav a relationship with som1 because I don't think im going to be a good girlfriend. I just see myself being the one who messes up the relaitionship.
2007-02-01 11:54:41 · answer #5 · answered by Cassy 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
For Heaven Sakes! This sounds like me also, except I have not had flings, my situation is more like I meet see someone once or twice and that is is.
I am real independent and although it would be nice to have a boyfriend, I am not sure know how to have a normal relationship. So you are not alone.
2007-02-01 11:56:08 · answer #6 · answered by homesweethomediana@sbcglobal.net 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
i used to be the same way...i would date guys and get bored of them after a couple weeks i thought i would never find someone to have a long term relationship but i also wasn't desperately wanting to be in one either.
then i met my now fiance and from the very start EVERYTHING was different...so i think you just need to find the right person and you will find things can drasticlly change. goodlcuk!
2007-02-01 11:55:12 · answer #7 · answered by bob123456789 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I was 26 before I had my first "relationship". It was scary at first but as time went on it got better and better. today we r married with three kids. Do what I did , just take it one day at a time.
2007-02-01 11:58:36 · answer #8 · answered by bubba 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's fine if you don't want to be in a relationship right now. One day you might meet someone that you love very much and want to get married. It's okay if you don't want to right now.
2007-02-01 11:53:06 · answer #9 · answered by mamabear 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋