It always looks like my boyfriend gives me dirty looks?

Question

when my boyfriend is really tired (which is like 80% of the time), he tends to give me dirty looks. it really bothers me...i dunno why i take it really personal. does anyone else have this problem?

Answer 1

Ms Paradise, don't take it personally. If everything is going fine in the relationship when he's not tired then I wouldn't put too much weight behind the looks. I personally get very grumpy when I'm tired. It'd doesn't mean that I am mad or don't care about who's talking to me or with me, it just means I'm tired and I want to sleep. I don't know why,.. it must be a flaw in the man. Okay, I just said I have a flaw,.. see what you've done now!!

Answer 2

If 80% of the time your boyfriend is giving you dirty looks and the rest is love?! Then you might have a problem. Either he's got someone else and is trying for you to make a problem out of it so he can come out as the victim and be happy with his other girl or he's got problems at school or work. He might have also heard something about you from friends or family. Before you jump to any conclusions you should ask him first if what is it that's bothering him. Ask him if there is anything he has against you. Try talking to him first and take it from there. Good luck

Answer 3

Well i think that is disrespectful. does he feel like you demand too much when he is tired? My boyfriend is always tired, he work 6 days a week/12 hours a day. But he lets me know that he is tired and he may not be able to give me the kind of attention I need but he never gives me dirty looks. Our line of communication is open. I would rather him tell me he cant do certain things bc he is tired than to just think he is a jerk. Your boyfriend needs to communicate to you things like that instead of dogging you cuz that would hurt me.

Answer 4

Look at it from his angle. Is there any reason he's giving you dirty looks? When I'm tired and grouchy, the smallest little thing can set me off in a dirty look frenzy.

Answer 5

Well thats weird i dont really get that from my boy!!!maby he's just tired and looks like he's giving u dirty looks dont think that unless u know for a fact.either that or he's a jerk.GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!

Answer 6

Wow, properly it certaintly ain't sturdy to interrupt up a relationship and f yur a woman and needs to have sexual family members with yet another female thats merely basic out EVIL...GOD MADE ADAM AND EVE, NOTT ADAM AND STEVE OR EVE AND EVA,, U needed suggestions SO MY concept FOR U IS to look for JESUS AND GET SPRAYED WITH HOLY WATER KUS IF U think of ITS ok for a girl TO B WITH yet another female then you fairly are OFFF and extremely EVIL,!!

Answer 7

he could be mad at you or just really tired. don't take it personal. ask him what the dirty looks are for - you don't know unless u ask.

Answer 8

he's thinking of what you'd look like servicing him as he works in the pit.

Answer 9

he ma ybe mad at you

Answer 10

Please take only 5 min. to read this, and
your boyfriend may want to read this also.
OR cut and paste it, in your Word Document
of your computer and have him read it later.

Love vs. Attachment

What is the world is the difference between loving a person and being attached to them ?
Love is the sincere wish for others to be happy, and to be free from suffering.
Having realistically recognized others' kindness as well as their faults, love is always focused on the other persons welfare. We have No ulterior motives to fulfull our self-interest, or to fulfill our desires; to love others simply because they exist.
Attachment, on the other hand, exaggertes others' good qualitities and makes us crave to be with them. When we're with them, we're happy, but when we're separated from them, we are often miserable. Attachment is linked with expectations of what others should be or do.
Is love as it is usually understood in our society
really love ? or attachment ? or even possibly for some, only lust.
Let us examine this a bit more. Generally we are attracted to people either because they have qualities we value or because they help us in some way. If we observe our own thought processes mindfully, and carefully - we'll notice that we look for specific qualities in others.
Some of these qualities we find attractive, others are those our parents, or society value.
We examine someone's looks, body, education,
financial situation, social status. This is how most of us decide on whether or not the person holds any true value to us.
In addition, we judge people as worthwhile according to how they relate to us. If they help us, praise us, make us feel secure, listen to what we have to say, care for us when we are sick or depressed, we consider them good people, and it is this type of people we are most likely to be more attracted to.

But this is very biased, for we judge them only in terms of how they relate to "us", as if we are the most important person in the world.
After we've judged certain people to be good for us, whenever we see them it appears to us as if goodness is coming from them, but if we are more aware, we recognize that we have projected this goodness onto them.

Desiring to be with the people alot who make us feel good, we become emotional yo-yo's -
when we're with these people, we're Up, when we're not with these people, we're Down.

Furthermore, we form fixed concepts of what our relationships with those people will be and thus have expectations of them. When they do not live up to our expectations of them, we're very disappointed, or may become angry !
We want them to change so that they will they will match what we think they are. But our projections and expectations come from our own minds, not from the other people.
Our problems arise not because others aren't
who we thought they we're, but because we mistakenly thought they were something they
aren't.
Checklist: "I Love You if __________ "
What we call love is most often attachment.
It is actually a disturbing attitude that overestamates the qualities of another person.
We then cling to tightly to that person, thinking our happiness depends on that person.
"Love, on the other hand, is an open and very calm, relaxed attitude. We want someone to be happy, and free from suffering simply because they exist. While attachment is uncontrolled and much too sentimental, Love is direct and powerful. Attachment obscures our judgment and we become impatient, angry, and impartial, helping only our dear one's and harming those who we don't like. Love builds up others, and clarifies our minds, and we
access a situation by thinking of the greatest good for everyone. Attachment is based on
selfishness, while Love is founded upon cherishing others, even those who do not look very appealing to the eyes. Love looks beyond
all the superficial appearences, and dwells on the fact that they are just like us: they want inner peace, happiness, and want to avoid suffering. If we see unattractive, dirty, ignorant people, we feel repulsed because our selfish minds watn to know attractive, intellectual, clean, and talented people. Love, on the other hand, never evaluates others by these superficial standards and looks much deeper into the person. Love recognizes that regardless of the others' appearances, their experience is the same as ours: they seek inner peace, to be happy, to be free from sufferings, and to do their best to avoid problems.
When we're attached, we're not mentally and emotionally free. We overly depend on and cling to another person to fulfill our mental and especially our emotional needs. We fear losing the person, feeling we'd be incomplete without him.
This does not mean that we should suppress our emotional needs or become aloof, alone and totally independent, for that too does not solve the problem. We must simply realize our unrealistic needs, and slowly seek to eliminate them. Some emotional needs may be so strong that they can't be dissolved immediately.
If we try to suppress them or pretend they do not exist, we become anxious, insecure, falling into a depression. In this case, we can do our best to fulfill our needs while simultaneously working gradually to subdue them.
"The core problem is we seek to be loved, rather than to love. We yearn to be understood by others rather than to understand them. In all honesty, our sense of emotional insecurities comes from the selfishness obscuring our own
minds. 'We can develop self-confidence by recognizing our inner potential to become a selfless human being with many, many magnificient qualities, then we'll develop a true and accurate feeling of self-confidence. And
then we'll seek to increase true love, without attachments, to increase compassion, to cultivate patience and understanding, as well as generousity, concentration and wisdom.'

'Under the influence of attachment we're bound by our emotional reactions to others. When they are nice to us, we're happy. When they ignore us, or speak sharply to us, we take it personally and are unhappy. But pasifying attachment doesn't mean we become hard-hearted. Rather, without attachment there will be space in our hearts and minds for genuine Affection and Impartial Love for them.
We'll be actively involved with them.
If we learn to subdue our attachments, we can most definately have successful friendships and personal relationships with others !! These relationships will be richer because of the freedom and respect - the relationships will be based on. We'll care about the happiness and the misery of all human beings equally, simply because everyone is the same in wanting and needing inner peace, happiness, and not wanting to suffer. However, our lifestyles and interests may be more compatible with those of some people more so than with others, and that is alright. In any case, our relationships will be based on mutual Love, mutual interests, and the wish to help each other in life.