My Man's son is four, can't potty-train. He won't use the toilet. He is a little behind than most kids.

Question

How can I or my boygfriend motivate him to use the bathroom. We tried everything. The fance potties, having him without diapers and in underwear. Telling him that he is a big boy now and that he needs to use the toiet so he won't smell like doodle...etc....what else can we do??

Answer 1

unfortunately i have been hearing alot about this lately,even kids that will only do it in the tub?i don't know whats going on ,maybe they are scared of the toilet?flushing sound?
has he tried taking him in the washroom when he goes i know it sounds nasty but it might work!can he not try and ask him why?i mean if he's 4 he must be able to communicate at some level,just tell him thats where it goes,don't allow him to wear pullups etc..he's sure to feel uncomfortable sitting in poop!
i hope you resolve this problem soon
goodluck

Answer 2

Well, I have a son who is 4 also. We just finally potty trained him. He was the most stubborn of all my kids so far. He is the third here to be potty trained, might I add. So, its not my first time around, he is what they call OCD, and he does not like change at all in his life. He is mentally a 32-36 month old child, as tests have showed and in Headstart also.

I like you did all the things I could think of, bought him his favorite character undies, rewards, stickers, toys, potty time book, rubber pants... the works. And nothing worked.

Here is what did however finally work. But if you do this you have to stay home for a good 3 days. With no interruption. Let him run around in just his underwear and a tee shirt all day for a good 3 days. (If possible) Every half hour, put him on the toilet (I always ran the water to help). He has to get use to the feeling of contracting his muscles to push the pee out.. so my doctors told me was the case. After a while he will get the idea. He will definitely not like the feeling of pee running down his legs, as he has an accident. I know you will have messes to clean up, so put an old tablecloth or towel under him, when hes sitting anywhere to avoid ruining the furniture and other household things. When he does have an accident, dont make a big deal out of it. But when he does successfully go on the toilet make a HUGE deal out of it. Call grammie, or someone that he looks up to, and let him tell them what a big boy he is, and how he used the potty all by himself! (I read somewhere that you should have an adult friend act as your childs superhero on the phone, and let him call his hero, to tell them.) It will make it more rewarding. Every time my son did, we called someone, and I would pick him up, hug him, kiss him, and sing praises to him at how good he was, and what a great job he's doing.

This is the only thing that worked for him, and I hope this gives you some help also. Take care & Best of Luck to you all!

Answer 3

He may have a problem that some children have with controlling there bladder. Does he know when he has to go to the bathroom take him to his doctor they might give you a few suggestions you can try with him. Try the new training pants that lets him know as soon as he is wet (feel and learn) that might help him and they look like big boys under where. You say he is behind most kids do you mean he is ld,mr or slow in development this could just be his problem and he will soon be potty trained. With kids who are slower you just have to be patient which I'm sure you are already doing that.

Answer 4

A neat trick that I have been witness to is to provide a 'Prize' if he uses it. Nothing big. Just a small toy wrapped as a present. Or a bin of presents that he can pick from. You can also recycle the presents as he forgets about them to save money.

Dr. Phil also had an episode where a man called on the phone and pretended to be Thomas the train. The little boy got a call from 'Thomas' when he used the potty. You would of course substitute your son's favorite character for Thomas.

Hope that helps.

Answer 5

potty training is difficult and is not something that happens quickley for some children, you have to be very consistant and if you guys are trying everything and the mother doesnt stay consistant with what you are doing then it just wont work until the child is ready on his own! good luck and find out if the mother could really try also

Answer 6

With my son I put a handful of "Froot Loops" cereal in the potty and told him to try to sink the loops with his pee. He loved doing that. Sometimes I used "Cheerios". I told him he'd have a better chance of sinking the cereal if he went poo in the potty. We'd count how many loops we'd put in and when he finished going poo, we'd count again to see how many were left. I know this sounds weird, but he enjoyed it. I kept a box of cereal by the potty (I wrote on the side of the box "Potty" so he wouldn't eat it). Good Luck!

Answer 7

We couldn't get my son potty trained for ever. My mother come to visit me and tells him to "make monster bubbles in the toilet" and hes potty trained within the week. I don;t get it. . . may be it's guy thing?

Answer 8

they say consistency. just keep at it. i know its frustrating. i never thought i was going to get it either. i dont know what to suggest since you already tried my suggestion but important dont make him feel bad about it.let him know he cant go to school until he does and he wont get to make new friends and learn and play.maybe a bribe. at this point i would pay him to do it.or maybe he does have a bladder problem ask your doctor. im sorry i cant help you more. i just wanted you to know that we are all different and just keep up the good work.

Answer 9

Once he starts school, the problem will be rectified when the other kids make fun of him, sadly.

Take him to a pediatrician and ask for help.

Answer 10

It happens.... got to keep trying. You don't mention how involved his mom is. Just do the best you can and you all have to be on the same team with this...