ok huge bridesmaide dialema!!!!!plz help!!?

Question

ok my partner has 3 nieces age 14,14 and 18 and one cousin also 18.I have a sister age 15 and cousins the age of 11,15,14 and 8!!
I only wanted 3 bridemaids maximum.I dont know how to tell the ones i dont want as my bridesmaids in a nice way because of the jelousy....I wanted my sister and my partners two young nieces but im worried its all going too get out of hand!!!

Also my mum wants me to have my two brothers as a paige boys but my partners family want me to have two young boys from their family....Im in deep dog poo lol

Please advise on what to do thank you!!!!xx

sorry about the spelling im in a bit of a fluster

Answer 1

You have to want who you have in your bridal party!.
You have those memories for a long time, and look at those photos for a long time!

There are pleanty of jobs at a wedding for little girls to do!.
Have one decortate the chairs/room, another of them help you get dressed, have another hand out the order of service, another hand out rose petals, another help people get seated, another take photos with a disposable camera if you have to! There are a heap of jobs at a wedding for that age group of girls, and if you point out to those you haven't picked, (on the quiet) that their jobs are actually more important than the others (as really the head bridesmaid is the only one with the official job of signing the marriage certificate, the other 2 are there to look pretty!!)

Relax, and have a good time!

Answer 2

Okay, listen. That's not a huge 'dialema' and you're being very dramatic. You don't have to get all "It's MY wedding" on your family. That's just stupid considering your wedding is for your family. Who do you think is celebrating? Being a bridezilla is tacky, disrespectful and just plain rude to your guests.

This is how it will happen. Your sister is a given. No one is going to question this choice.

Now, for the choice between the cousins and the nieces. Well, clearly the neices come first since they are your partners siblings children. I'm assuming here that the father of these neices is your partners brother and he too will be standing up at the wedding. This way you are involving the immediate family.

Your parents siblings children (your cousins) are not really part of the immediate family in the same way.

And your other problem, to justify the whole immediate or close enough to family reasoning, you can easily choose your two brothers. So, who should be involved in the wedding? You, your partner and siblings + siblings children + you and your partner's parents. Got it? Good. Explain.

Good luck and good day :)

Answer 3

A bridesmaid is relied on for alot of tasks, some of the younger ones may not be able to live up to that. One way to reolve that is have the three you want and make some say "candle lighters" others can be "junior bridesmaids" this is typically a title given to the younger girls ina wedding. At that young age they would feel happy just to be a part of your wedding and may be relieved to not have the pressure of being a bridesmaid. Good luck!

Answer 4

OK take a deep breath and stay calm.....does that feel better?? It is a really hard decision to make, but in the end it is your wedding and you have to do it your way or you will regret it for years to come. Family may get offended, but just say to them that this is YOUR vision, and you do not have the budget to have everyone. Explain to them that it means a lot to you to have them there and celebrate the day with you, but that the bridal party will be too large with everyone. Why not suggest they get dresses in the same colour theme as your bridesmaids and have them walk around the reception with baskets of favours for people?

Answer 5

piepiepie gave you a great answer.

Just to elaborate on what she said, if it still becomes a big deal, ask your cousins to take some other role in the ceremony - passing out the programs & the rice (or bubbles, or whatever) to guests as they're leaving the church, or to do a reading during the ceremony, or if you're having a mass with your wedding ceremony to bring up the gifts, or to watch the guest book and to encourage people to sign in. Make them a corsage so they feel a part of the day, too.

Problem solved.

Answer 6

it is up to you & your fiance to decide just who you want - however I do agree with the answerer who said sibling & sibling's children
Do keep in mind that you will probably need to have 1 maybe 2 people over 18/21( whichever applies in your country) to sign the register - they do not necessarily have to be part of the bridal party .
My daughter did this - she had here sister as a bridesmaid & ahd her grandmother step forward to sign the papers.
the fewer attendants that you have the easier it will be to co-ordinate outfits etc.
Also you really only need to ask those you want to be part of the bridal party - no need to say anything to anyone else

Answer 7

For me personally, I think that guys should be able to wear speedos if they want to. There is the large stigma in the United States against speedos. I don't quite understand why. Are you going to get a few weird looks when wearing them, yeah. But don't let that discourage you. Wear what you are most comfortable in. If that's speedos, great. If that's board shorts, cool. Wear what you feel the most comfortable in and don't let anyone else change your mind.

Answer 8

Try to have a mix from both families...you could forget about family entirely and ask a close friend. That might save some of the drama.

Answer 9

1. This is your wedding
2.If your parents want to add people you werent intending too, put your foot down.
3. Give the kids little jobs to do, Have the boys hand out programs, have the girls greet people at the door. Have fun with it.

Answer 10

have who YOU want. If you want three, have three. Find other things for the others to do. Guest book, flower girls, handing out programs. Don't let others tell you how to run your wedding.. The added expense could be used in other places.