I have been with my STBX for 11 years married for almost 8. I can't remember what it's like to be single.
2007-01-31 21:39:17 · 12 answers · asked by 10 pts for me? 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
So you find yourself single again, at an age you never thought you would have to do this "dating" thing. Sort of different now, isn't it? But then, so are you!
Learning to live in the world again as a single instead of being part of a couple is difficult, but not impossible. There are stages of life that we all must go through, and learning the rules of this new game can be exciting and fun, but it can also be frustrating, and yes, lonely. The longer you were married, the more changes you can expect, but not all of them are bad!
Your friends who are still happily married may shun you, and you may find that your social circle has become very small indeed. You need to expect it to happen. As you venture out into new experiences, you will be nervous, downright scared, and again -- lonely.
Being nervous is OK, and a little fear is acceptable, but don't let those emotions ruin what can be a happy and fun time for you. Especially if your new single life has involved a move to a new city, your work to build this new life will be different, and difficult. But here is something you absolutely must do: Get a life! No one is going to come knocking on your door offering you one, so you have to make your own. This is a great time to do some of those things you always wanted to do but didn't have time for. You do now!
Getting involved in singles groups in your age range is one great way to become active. There isn't one? Then start one. Even if it's with just another single person from work or church, get active and get OUT. Go together to dinner and a movie weekly. Take piano lessons, or foreign language classes. Teach a class or seminar yourself on something you enjoy or are just good at. Join a cooking school, exercise group, book club; take up golf (great way to meet the opposite sex), or join a travel club (another great way!).
Making a life you are happy with, and choosing to be content, will work wonders for making YOU the type of person someone wants to share their life with. Make new friends, and also keep a few of the old ones. Get some new hobbies and blend them into your old ones. Building a new YOU while you build this new life can be interesting as well as fun. But be prepared for this transition to take months, even years. Taking these changes one day at a time, one step at a time, is the only way you can gain the confidence to move forward into this new life and find the happiness you deserve.
It's there. You just have to find it. You can't do that by staying inside those four walls, alone.
2007-02-01 04:41:25 · answer #1 · answered by frisky_pink_bunny22 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a blast, but you need to remember you will have some very lonely times, and that is the worst part of it. It's good to have a friend around that will hold you while you sleep - or just because - when you start to wonder why the heck you dint stay with the x LOL
Good luck, it really is fun out here and HTH
2007-02-01 05:42:19 · answer #2 · answered by Star 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I went through it too. With my ex for 7 yrs. It was hard at first getting back into the dating scene, but before long I got the hang of it and was back to my old, sly ways. Unfortunately I was snagged again but this time by a good woman. We have been together for 13 years.
2007-02-01 05:44:51 · answer #3 · answered by TE 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's both good and bad. It's a good thing that the holiday season is behind us. Being single around Christmas time really hurts. Good Luck with your new life. :)
2007-02-01 05:54:02 · answer #4 · answered by Darktania 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well honey you well be lonely lot of time at night and some time at day i have been single for 30 years and i steel get lonely
2007-02-01 05:48:34 · answer #5 · answered by EVA J 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Scary... need to meet people... wade through all the crap... work out the players from the genuine guys... decide if you want another relationship or just have sex... decide whether you want to experiment with same sex... and decide which age group(s) you want to try out... older, younger, similar age... :D
2007-02-01 05:45:36 · answer #6 · answered by Forlorn Hope 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it´s always sad when a relationship ends.
well i can tell you it takes time to get used to but after a weil you will enjoy your single life.take your time before you get committed again.
wish you all the best
2007-02-01 05:45:28 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
just remember why you got divorced in the first place ..cuz youll probably be "used to" having some1 around
2007-02-01 05:46:04 · answer #8 · answered by *Hot.s.lut. 4 U to POUND ON 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Liberating for a while and lonely later!
2007-02-01 05:56:12 · answer #9 · answered by Tigger 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A huge relief.
2007-02-01 05:45:55 · answer #10 · answered by sparkleythings_4you 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋