i had realtionship earlier( who died) we however got involved physically and today i regret a lot . i love my present bf and alwz feel that i rushed in the realier realtionship too fast as he was never meant for me. i feel very cheap and r\bad plz help
2007-01-31 18:31:47 · 28 answers · asked by blessed damozel 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You cant change it, so why dwell on it???
2007-01-31 18:37:10 · answer #1 · answered by ABBYsMom 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Well bfs/gfs come and go...you could be saying that for each individual relationship you have but its fairly pointless.
The decision you made, at the time, was appropriate for you AT THE TIME....and at ANY given time in your life you will make a decision that feels right for you in that moment. If this person doesnt end up marrying you or lies, cheats on you...etc and so forth (not saying he would)...you will be thankful that you DIDNT save yourself for him.
Oh...and how could you possibly know you would meet him anyway OR that a relationship would evolve. You cant hang on to something for the "sake" of someone you may never meet. Regret is a wasteful emotion.....if he likes the way you make love...then your exbf at least taught you something.
Virgins are boring and scary...too much responsibility for most guys. If its that your bf has raised the issue and wished otherwise (about you)....then he's an emotionally abusive, control-freak and not worth your time. If he hasnt raised the issue and DOESNT CARE (and its only you doing the regreting thing yourself)...why the heck should you?
2007-01-31 18:45:36 · answer #2 · answered by Scully 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You cannot fix the past, so letting go of it is the only way to preserve the present good. By the way, this is what real forgiveness (rather than the controlling kind pushed by some churches) is about - letting go so you can grow.
We all make mistakes. Mistakes are okay if you learn from them. Learn to love and you learn to live.
2007-01-31 18:38:49 · answer #3 · answered by I'm not tellin' 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
seeing as your earlier relationship died, you never will know how it would have turned out. You can't punish yourself for something you didn't have any control over. Maybe you know now that it never would have worked out, but i am sure you really loved him then.
Concentrate more on giving to the current bf and not dwelling in the past
2007-01-31 18:37:13 · answer #4 · answered by hermespgc 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dear friend , you must learn to live & enjoy the present . Past is past , become history and you have no control over it . Then why you are spoiling your present by thinking about the time , already gone . Please do concentrate on your present life , live and enjoy to its fullest . Do not think and feel guilty about your past . Cheer up and spread your, ever lasting charms and hence forth restart collecting new memorable experience in life .
2007-01-31 18:49:51 · answer #5 · answered by your noon 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have given yourself, but can stop giving yourself. Everyone makes mistakes, but intelligent people learn from them. Sex is not the unforgivable sin, and in forgiveness, you can claim your purity again by virtue of your heart, though you can not claim to be a virgin. If you wait from now until you are married, that gift will still be very special to your husband. One of the beauties of free will is a second chance.
2007-01-31 18:37:26 · answer #6 · answered by Ellie W 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You can't change your past. And don't ever feel guilty for it. Your life experiences are yours and you should appreciate what you've been through and what you've learned from them. They've made you the person you are today. No one has the right to judge you so don't be so hard on yourself.
2007-01-31 18:48:15 · answer #7 · answered by Ms. M 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
O well...
You definitely have to get over that feeling in order to get on with your life. If he's not making you feel cheap and you think you are, that's a problem for YOU, not for him unless he loves you.
Explain you him how you feel. If he loves you he'll understand and he'll make sure that you won't continue to allow yourself feel like a slut.
Love is like that.
Good Luck and have fun. Relax. Let his love engulf you. You'll probaly feel better before you know it!
2007-01-31 18:44:20 · answer #8 · answered by BadBill 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
don't be so down. I regret my first time too, but I can't change it and it doesn't make me a bad person. You too realize that it wasn't meant to be, but just make yourself a better person and just love your b/f like you should. Don't feel cheap about it either, we all make mistakes but we bounce back.
2007-01-31 18:37:13 · answer #9 · answered by forealztho69 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You have to realise that sex is just sex. If you are feeling cheap and bad because losing your virginity, it's because you are falling for lies. There is nothing about sex that makes it bad or cheap. It is a meaning that society has given to sex. The reasons for this have to do with social control and sexism. Forget it. Enjoy yourself.
2007-01-31 18:37:14 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
the one thing we can never change is our past. but you can learn from what happened. there's nothing we can do to change it. don't be too hard on yourself...i know you have learned from your experience and its time for you to move on. don't let yourself be a prisoner of your past. what you have learned from your past makes your mistake a valuable lesson. move on. i think your bf loves you so much. you can still have a great relationship.
2007-01-31 18:41:47 · answer #11 · answered by iris 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋