ive been dating this guy for almost 2 years?

Question

he's awesome, intelligent, everyone loves him, reliable and has a very bright future. both of us are in the same college taking the same major. but the thing is, i feel extremely inferior to him. he's been getting offers for exchange programmes, some firms (we're taking architecture) have asked him to design logos, websites and presentation boards. he's basically an all rounder and can do anything. he really stands out. while im over shadowed by his achievements. its not easy for me to catch up with him. i dont think i ever can. and im under pressure because of this. i really need help. a solution of some kind. thanks.

under pressure to the point of breaking up? is that okay to do?

Answer 1

Don't sell yourself short! How wonderful it is that the guy you love has so many amazing qualities, and I'm sure you're proud of him for them. But look at all that you have to offer as well. Your boyfriend is with you for a reason--he probably sees so many wonderful qualities in you. You should write down everything that you have to offer--and remember, it's not just measured in outside accomplishments. Know that your boyfriend is doubly lucky to have such a great girl by his side cheering him on.

Answer 2

If you really love him, you wouldn't question whether or not you should break up with him, unless there was a concrete reason (jealousy is not an acceptable reason.) So I will first ask this ... do you really love him? If my fiance and I chose the same major and he was farther ahead than myself, I would congratulate him and encourage him to pursue his dreams; even if it meant I was not as successful as he. It isn't a competition, relationships are supposed to be a partnership. Are you jealous of other aspects pertaining to him, or just his current success? Perhaps he is naturally talented at what he does, however your best is the best you can do and there will always be someone who is "better." If you have these feelings of jealousy towards your own boyfriend, chances are you will have them towards others in your future career field. In fact, you will have jealousy for every person you encounter, so just stop with those feelings right now because they will cause you (and possibly others) more harm than good. Do what you can and don't worry about who's ahead of who. Support and love your boyfriend as he supports and loves you.

Answer 3

first of all dont break up with him, because if you ever ask your self or asked by somone one else in the future WHY you broke up with him, whats your answer going to be? " he was everything i could have ever wanted"

You need to understand that where He Lacks thats where you stand out. Every single human has a god given tallent, passion, hobby, Etc Etc, you have something he doesnt and he will always admire you for that.

Another thing: There is a sayign that goes " you are only as (substitute word here ____ {Bright,good, smart, hapy, sad, negative})as the people you surround yourself with" Your boyfriends presence in your life WILL weather you like it or not bring your life style upwards with him if thats where you say he is going, not in any matiralistic or monetary way, i mean in fullness, in happyness. he is well rounded, then you can only learn how to be well rounded form him. to express as much detail from that point as possible ill give you the opposite, if he was stupid and filthy, then thats all you have to learn from him.

Also, having somone that is better than you around will ALWAYS even if you HATE it(the fact that hes better)/him(the person whos better) let alone the fact that your apparetnly in love with him, it will always give you a kick in the bum to make you aspire to ALSO be great.

I speak from experiance because my girlfriend is better than me in everythign and i love her for always being there for me.

God luck in all your endevours,
Michael K. Mikhail

Answer 4

Sounds like you're jealouse of his acheivments...be honest with yourself. It's not his fault he's getting better offers or has more social grace...you need to look at where your at, if you not happy that's your fault and you need to work on getting where you wanta be...the reverse of this is would you feel better about yourself if the people around you were not as succesful as you, but your skill remained the same? If so you more interested in being better than others than being as good at what you do as you can be...quite being a cop out and get too work, or get out of the way of those that can if it make you uncomfortable

Answer 5

You shoudn't break up with him over that. You need to tone down your competative side or you could end up killing all your future relationships and wind up lonely.

Besides. Who knows? One day, you could pass him up in the creative dept. Just because he's better than you now, doesn't mean that you won't be more of a sucess than he is in the future.

Just hang in there. On top of that, you could probably learn from him.

Don't feel so down. You would make a great couple. You have SO much in common.

Answer 6

It seems that you are trying to compete with this guy and as good as you are, he is just better. You cannot think of yourself as chopped liver just because of this. He may be also very good at marketing himself.

You put undue pressure on yourself. You have been dating him for almost 2 years, Are you in love with him or awed by him. I am not getting an emotional connection that you have with him. Ideally, I think he should start his own architectural firm and have you as his partner. What do you think of that?

Answer 7

Well, the fact that your even thinking of breaking it off with him just for the fact that he's successfull, really means one thing. Your insecure. He's not the problem. Your, your own problem. You will just face it again once you move on to the next guy unless you become more rational. Even though that's probably hard for you to do, be rational. Sounds like a good guy. Don't make a mistake that you will just regret later on.

Answer 8

The first thing you need to realize is that it's a relationship, not a competition, or popularity contest. It's natural for you to feel a little envious, but you should be supportive of him. He may need that from you more than you think. Your time will come, I promise you. If you truly love him, you won't let this destroy your relationship. Take it from a fellow artist.
Additionally, the more supportive you are of him, the more he'll love you. Think about that.

Answer 9

Who says love is a competition? If he loves you and you love him...that's getting off to an excellent start!
You're educated and should know better. Relax and do the best you can. That's all that anybody wants and needs.

You go girl.

You seem like a very nice young lady and he a good man. Relax and go for it.

Good luck!

Answer 10

Your problem is that you are racing him! Does this make sense. You should not sit and say...this person has this, this person has achieved this, this person has a house already and is younger than me....etc. The only person you need to race is yourself. When you figure this out then it will all make sense to you. Stop racing other people in life, and start racing your self. You should not worry about the progress that other people are making in their lifes and compare it to yours. You should just set goals for yourself and try to achieve them. Don't let go of someone you love just because he has achieved his goals. You will always find something that you envy in someone. The goal is to stop racing other people.

"The biggest fight in life that you will have, is the fight within yourself."