I met my boyfriend when I was 15 years old and going into high school. I'm 17 now, almost through with my junior year. Before I met him, my boyfriend was a skater who used to hang out with his friends, get drunk, and smoke weed. Now that we're dating, I feel like he's kind of controlling me:
I wanted to get my belly button pierced and a small tattoo when I turn 18, but he doesn't want me to.
Smoking weed is something I've wanted to try; he says I can't.
I feel like I've missed out on a lot of stuff in high school (i.e. dating other people). We've both talked about marriage, and I really want to marry him...but I feel like I'm just living a dull life.
Any advice?
Please Notice: Please don't judge me for wanting to smoke weed, get a tattoo, go clubbing with my girls, etc. I'm not here to get criticized. I know smoking is extremely dangerous, but it's my choice if I want to do it (even though it's probably stupid). I'm looking for advice, not accusations. Thanks.
2007-01-31 16:26:08 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He cares about you and does not want you to make the same mistakes he did.
But most people want to make their own mistakes to learn from.
If you don't like living a dull life then you shouldn't get married until you want the protection and advice from your loving man.
My guess is your life is not that boring, It just seems that way because you see all the other kids screwing up their bodies and minds and that looks like fun.
Remember the grass is always greener on the other side.
If you really love this guy listen to him and build your life around him.
If you don't then move on.
If you decide to leave him then you can explain to your grand kids someday just how you got all those extra holes and faded ink all over your body.
That is if you can remember how it all happened.
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2007-01-31 16:31:31 · answer #1 · answered by Dave Yours Truly 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I met my husband at 13 years old. we have been together 23 years. And yes he was exactly as you describe your boyfriend.
If you really love this guy give him a chance. He is probably just trying to protect you in the only was he no's how. I wanted to do the same things. I had my first tattoo at 30 and my belly button done at 32. I am really glad I waited on the tattoo cause I would have done something stupid. Dont let him turn into your whole life you still need to go out and have fun. If he really loves you he may get mad at you but he will get over it. Believe me they do get over it. I am really glad I stayed with my husband he is a great husband and father and has grown out of the contolling attitude. Good Luck.
2007-01-31 16:38:29 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
gurl dont trip im gettin a tat after grad n im only 16 n i have ma belly peirced well if u feel like u lived a dull life go hav fun maybe he's the problem y u think ur life is dull i had a controlling b/f 1nce but then we broke up n ma new guy is like okay w/ everything i do oh n smokin weed isnt all that bad if he tells u u cant then tell him to stop get bak at me if u want any more advice
2007-01-31 16:36:14 · answer #3 · answered by RO~Z 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't be too harsh on him. It's not that he's trying to control you from what I hear, but perhaps he really cares about you. Ask him the reasons and maybe he will tell you. He probably doesn't think they are good things for you to do. Of course you have to every right to make your own decisions, but he may just care because he's had the experience and knows the results. It's good to address your feelings to him. Communication is key to every relationship. You won't be able to work anything out if you don't talk!
2007-01-31 16:35:10 · answer #4 · answered by artutina 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most teenagers always tend to experience what you want to do. There is nothing wrong trying it once. But maybe your boyfriend thinks of you as a more decent girl and that is why he cares to much for you to not do weed. And if you love him you won't care about even wanting to date anyone else. Especially if you want to marry him one day! Just go with the flow and be careful in whatever your choices are.
2007-01-31 16:38:26 · answer #5 · answered by Humming Bird 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My dear if u are going to be in an attacking mode then u want tailor made answers and thats not genuine. Just throw your question, people will answer and you will choose what is helpful to you.
Sorry but im scared to give u my opinion because it might not fall into acceptable.
All the best though
2007-01-31 16:33:06 · answer #6 · answered by LadyK 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Experimenting is necessary. That's okay. What is not okay is the fact that you are not being a strong woman. Do not ever let anyone else tell you what you can and can't do...unless it's your parents and you are still in their house. Letting someone else make even one decision for you makes you weak. You have to be opinionated, independent, and confident to get places in life. Forget about him trying to tell you what to do. Explain to him that you are you and if he doesn't like it...find someone who accepts that. You deserve it.
2007-01-31 16:32:42 · answer #7 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I even have been in my modern-day relationship for 3 years and that i completely be attentive to how your bf feels. i admire my bf very lots yet i'm additionally bored, via fact he only has no recommendations for the place/what we can do for dates, so we circulate out lesser and lesser, yet we nonetheless love one yet another... i'm only like your bf, everytime my bf says enable's circulate right here or there, I only push it off, keeps complaining i'm bored, I additionally consult with him lesser on the telephone at the instant, i do no longer even deliver textual content fabric messages that for the period of lots of situations, yet I nonetheless love him as lots. this is only a word, have a competent communicate with him. If this is something with him, only provide him a while and prepare him which you care. If this is the relationship, perhaps you adult adult males ought to communicate it out. in case you adore your bf, you ought to no longer be questioning approximately different adult adult males? perhaps, it is likewise time you re-examine your emotions on your bf? there's no longer something incorrect with no longer desiring lots intercourse. I additionally want greater high quality in relationship than only the actual exertion.
2016-09-28 06:34:35 · answer #8 · answered by barnell 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The things you want are really really normal.
Would you think it's fair if your parents (or guardians) tried to control you that much even after you turn 18? After all, they love you.
It's even normal that you want to marry him, but you need to take some time to continue growing up. And I'll tell you what... it's hard to grow up when you have a controlling boyfriend.
2007-01-31 16:32:17 · answer #9 · answered by Buying is Voting 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think you're selfish though,.....I'm sorry for that....
First know your BF personally.......
If he does'nt want you to do those things.....
Listen to him...Youre te only one that could save him....
He still loves you and has a FAITH in you for his future and yours...
That's why he is controlling you......
for the BEST of you two, in the future......
Don't mind the things you've missed, mind the things that's ahead of you...it's much exciting if you give it a kick...
2007-01-31 16:38:45 · answer #10 · answered by ismashkhy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋