I can't believe I'm asking this, but what is the corniest joke you know?

Question

I guess I'm just in one of those moods. Humor me. Ah ha ha ha ha ha

Answer 1

The corniest joke I know is......

A man walks into the sheriff's office... "I want to become a deputy!"

"Good, I want to you to catch this man" says the sheriff handling the man a wanted poster.

The poster reads : 'Last seen wearing a brown paper hat, brown paper shirt, brown paper pants, and brown paper boots.'

"What's he wanted for?" asked the hopeful yound man.

"Rustling."



Another corny joke is.....

One day three strings are walking down the street. It is very hot out and the strings want a drink, so they stop at the soda shop. A very big sign out-side says "NO STRINGS ALLOWED" but the first string is super thirsty so he goes inside. The string goes and gets his soda, puts it up on the counter. the man looks at the string and asks, "Are you a string?" and the string says "no" the man dosen't buy it and kicks the string out. The other strings laugh but the second string is super thirsty, so he gets on a hat and glasses and goes inside. Again the string gets his coke and goes to the counter. But yet again the man will not be fooled, and kicks that string out. The other strings have good laugh at this but they still are thirsty, so the third string comes up with an idea. He tells his friends to wrap him up in a knot and then, when he looks all twisted up, he tousels around his hair and goes inside. He grabs his coke and goes to the counter. The man looks at him and asks, "are you a string?" and the string looks up and says "Nope, I'm a frayed knot" (afraid not)
Pretty corny huh?

and here is another one....

Whats pink and fluffy?
Pink fluff

and another one while I'm at it....

Why is a red light constantly red?
YOU WOULD BE TOO IF YOU HAD TO CHANGE IN FRONT OF EVERYONE

and maybe another one to keep us all happy....

A nickel and a quarter are standing on a bridge,the nickel jumps off.Why doesn't the quarter jump?
Cause he has more cents (sense)

ok ok I know I probably should stop but I am on a roll so......

Knock Knock
Who's there?
How do you spell
How do you spell who?
W.h.o.


and another.....

Whats brown and sticky ?
A stick

sorry I can't stop.....

What's big and red and eats rocks?
A big red rock eater.


yep if you want me to stop telling you corny jokes just stop reading ok.....

Knock Knock
Who's There?
Doctor
Doctor Who?
That's right, you just said it

again....

Wanna hear a dirty joke?
Joe fell in the mud
Wanna hear a clean joke?
Joe had a bath with bubbles
Wanna hear a dirty joke?
Bubbles is his neighbour

once again....

Whats a fly with no wings?
A walk

2 to go....

What does the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing it just waves

last and final one......

A MAN SAYS TO HIS WIFE, "I HEARD A CORNY JOKE LAST NIGHT!"
THE WIFE ASKS, "HOW CORNY WAS IT?"
THE MAN SAYS, "IT WAS SO CORNY THAT IT WAS ON THE COBB!!!"


The End Of Corniest!!!!!

Answer 2

A neutrino walks through a bar.

Answer 3

a man walks into a bar OOOUCH

OR is that a banana in your pcket or are you just pleased to see me

wana hear a realy good joke YOU

or even wow you look like a million dollars ALL GREEN &CRINKLY

I FANCY YOU for the grand national

id definatly **** you UP WITH A BASE BALL BAT.

weyhey id f**k you but you couldnt tell any one & you would have to have 5 million cash.

hope these cheer you up bud. i hope there corny eneugh.
going to sleep now byeeeeeee.

Answer 4

1) Two muffins are in an oven and one of them says "Whew! It sure is hot in here!"
And the other one goes "Oh my God! A talking muffin!"

2) ...or if you don't like that one, I have a knock-knock joke for you.You start it.

...who's there?

3) Why did the wolf cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

4) From George Carlin: They should make a feminine deodorant spray called "Sprunt".

5) Steven Wright: "Snakes have no arms, that's why they don't wear vests."

Answer 5

This horse walks into a bar and walks up to the bartender. The bartender looks at the horse and says "why the long face"? Hardy har har!lol

Answer 6

A skeleton walks into a bar and asks the bartender, " Let me have a beer and a Mop..."

I know, old and stale but still a corny joke......LOL

Answer 7

An old lady went up to Mr president's office one day and told him:

old lady: hey i bet you 10 million dollars that your balls are square-shaped

Mr President: haha! that cant be true, they are eound as far as i know.

Old lady: well, take the bet if you are so sure. But i insit, they are square in shape. I need to examine it to be sure that u prove me wrong.

Mr President: ok then. Now?

Old lady: Since a big sum of cash is involved, i suggest tommorow would be good. I shall bring my lawyer to sign an an agreement of 5 million dollars to conclude our bets

The president agreed. But at nigth, just to make sure, he stripped bare to examine his own balls. Seeing that it is in proper natural shape, he was contented.

The very next day, the old lady came up to him with her lawyer.

Mr President: Hah, im warning you, you would lose a fortune in this.
Old lady: Its ok. Im old enough to risk it anyways.

So the president showed her his assets.

Old lady: can i touch them just to make sure?
After a moment of consideration, he said yes and let her do whatever she wanted to do.

Old lady: ok, so they are round, u win then, i will transfer you the 5 mil immediately.

Upon saying this, the president saw that her lawyer was furiously banging his head against the wall over and over.
He was confused but decided to ask her anyways

Mr president: whats wrong with him?

Old lady: oh, he is alright. I just made a bet of twenty million that the president would let me play with his balls today

Answer 8

1) Q. Why did the girl fall off the swing?
A. She had no arms.

2) What did Batman say to Robin right before they got in the Batmobile?
A. "Get in the Batmobile Robin"

Answer 9

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Answer 10

Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9!