My husband and I are both very attractive and high maintenance people.When our daughter was born 16 years ago we were both expecting a beauty queen but were devestated by what we got.We've tried dealing with the fact that our daughter is ugly but it's been hell.We send her to boarding school where she's been since she started school but now she wants to come home and I don't know how to deal.I don't want to take her places or be seen with her really.My husband has been able to deal with it a lot better than me but I don't know what to do once she gets here.She has everything a girl could possibly want material wise but still can't make friends and I'm so ashamed of her for it.We've never called her ugly to her face or tried to put her down in any way.How in the world could this have happened?What's a parent supposed to do?
2007-01-31 15:04:11 · 64 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Let's get somethig straight.My daughter has no idea why she was send to boarding school.We told her it was to get a better education.We've never said anything to affect her self-esteem negatively and we do tell her we love her.
2007-01-31 15:27:36 · update #1
Let's get somethig straight.My daughter has no idea why she was send to boarding school.We told her it was to get a better education.We've never said anything to affect her self-esteem negatively and we do tell her we love her.
2007-01-31 15:27:48 · update #2
a real parent would accept there child just like she is. if there is ONE person who should love her for who she is, its you. you shouldnt be ashamed to show her, you should be ashamed of thinking your daughter is ugly
2007-01-31 15:09:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 21⤊ 0⤋
There are a couple of things that quickly came to mind when I read this question:
1. you're a troll
2. you are totally shallow and bereft of human decency
Assuming that you are genuine in your inquiry...
Genes can be dominant or recessive.
Just because you are attractive doesn't necessarily entail that your offspring will be. Physical appearance is only one facet of a person, the world certainly focuses heavily on it, but it isn't the most important. True beauty comes from within, someone with charm and a sense of humor is far more attractive then someone with perfect cheekbones/etc, but a vapid stare, and self centered conversation.
Your daughter has value far beyond what she looks like on the outside. Everyone is going to get old and wrinkly eventually so being beautiful is not something that has true value. Being a decent, intelligent, and caring human being is a good goal. Is she talented, creative, funny, intelligent, unique?? Does she accept people for who they are without regard to their looks?
Perhaps instead of lavishing her with material possessions, you should make an investment of quality time with her. Then maybe you will know her well enough to look past her "ugliness". Life is not fair, nor is it a storybook. There are ugly things that happen, and ugly people, but you can't tell that by just a simple glance. Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes straight to the bone. Check yourself out in that mirror and see how you look.
2007-01-31 15:19:17 · answer #2 · answered by dantheman_028 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What kind of a person are you to judge anybodys beauty; especially your own child! I bet she isn't as "ugly" as you say she is and I bet she has a beautiful soul! If she can't make friends it's because you never taught her any social skills and your just throwing her away and not being posotive roll models has damaged her self esteem! You may not call her ugly to her face but by not telling her you love her, showing her your love and support, and being there for her you have showed her that you think she's ugly!
Society puts too much emphasis on beauty! I belive that what people are on the inside is what makes them "beautiful"!! And right now I think you and your husband are the ugliest people in the world and your daughter is beautiful.
You have done irreversible damage to her. All she wants from you is for you to treat her like a real daughter; to love her; and to be proud of her! You are definately some of the sorriest people and parents I have ever heard of!! You ought to be taken out and beaten; and scared for life so that you two can be UGLY!!!
Children are a precious gift and should not be judged and thrown away~ they should be loved and adored!! YOU ARE HORRIBLE PEOPLE and I hope you die!
2007-01-31 15:23:29 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You have got to be kidding. I just read something that made me sick- your question. How could parents talk about their children that way. You may be beautiful on the outside, but let me tell you your heart is ugly. I normally do not get this upset at questions. Maybe she has a hard time making friends because of the ego centered parents she has. Children are a gift from God and you are talking trash about her, Unbelievable. What is a parent supposed to do, LOVE THEIR DAUGHTER, and teach her that the most important thing in life is not material, is not outward beauty, but inward beauty that reflects the love of God, Yes I mention God because you asked this question on this site. God created your child. Instead of being ashamed that she does not have friends, be a friend to her yourself. You may surprising find beauty you did not know she had. If you want your daughter to have friends, be an example of a loving mother. Your beauty is only skin deep sorry to say,
2007-01-31 15:50:27 · answer #4 · answered by AdoreHim 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Well, Brianna Paige! If that's really how you feel about your daughter, send her to me where she can be loved and cared about no matter what she looks like.
You said you and your husband are both very attractive and high maintenance people - attractive? Maybe on the outside, but your heart certainly isn't! High maintenance? Definitely!
I can probably guess what you did when you were pregnant - tried to stay as thin as possible so that you still were "attractive"! If that's what you did, you created the physical and mental components of your daughter's body through poor nutrition during the pregnancy. Did you feed her only health giving foods, or were you too busy maintaining your "attractive and high maintenance" self to give her growing body what it really needed?
If you think it's been hell for you, you are a narrow, shallow shell of a creature. What do you think it's been like for your daughter? You may have never TOLD her you think she's ugly, but she knows alright - your daughter isn't as stupid as you appear to be.
What's a parent supposed to do? First up: Get some therapy and build some emotional maturity, love and compassion into that brain and soul of yours! No 2: Stop plying your daughter with worldy crap that she probably doesn't want. No 3: APOLOGISE for not loving her and accepting her for her precious and unique self, regardless of what she looks like. No 4: Turn your heart to your child and see what it feels like for her to know that her mother is ashamed and embarrassed to be seen with her. Your attitude is sickening. Your daughter does not deserve to have such a vain, abusive person for a mother. She is crying out for your love and acceptance and all you can think about is yourself and how others (perhaps your friends???) may see her. It's all about you.......... isn't it?
Know that Karma will come back to you............
2007-01-31 15:23:37 · answer #5 · answered by cottagencountry 1 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Come on...is this a joke???
Are you talking about physical beauty? Or is she not a nice/good person? If you are talking about physical beauty you need to do some self evaluation. Physical beauty is skin deep (and also individually determined) and people can be beautiful in many other ways. It would be incredibly shallow to call your own daughter ugly.
As for her inability to make friends, maybe she is shy or not very social. If so, that is just her personality. Accept her for what she is, show her your love and support. After all, she is your daughter.
It really sounds like you need to seek some help for yourself. Perhaps a good therapist could help you figure out why you are so critical of your daughter's appearance.
2007-01-31 15:16:07 · answer #6 · answered by luvmykids 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i'm horrified by using your question. How can a determine have this sort of unfavorable approach and feeling approximately her very own daughter? As a mom you're able to have unconditional love on your daughter. Even a dogs has unconditional like to its offspring! approximately your daughter's ugliness, that's only epidermis deep. She desires your love and compassion, which any mom could comfortably bathe her infant. visual charm ugliness isn't your daughter's fault. You, in spite of the undeniable fact that, is gruesome from the heart point. you're able to feel embarrassment approximately your self quite of feel embarrassment approximately your daughter. you do not have the standard of a mom. you do not have a high quality of a individual! Even a stranger could attempt to regulate themselves whilst desirous to assert somebody is gruesome. You, in spite of the undeniable fact that, incapable of controlling your gruesome comments approximately her. have you ever seen the reason on your daughter's ugliness? may be you probably did something incorrect together as having her on your womb. Did you're looking after your self mentally and bodily nicely for the period of being pregnant? Or did you smoke, drink, use drugs, and having severe intercourse without regard on your unborn infant? that's quite straight forward to renowned which you have been the wrongdoer who created your daughter's suffering based on the reality which you have no attention on your daughter's wellness. the cloth issues you gave your daughter does no longer advise something! Do you recognize? I advise you to start include your daughter as an entire individual, supply her unconditional love. may be along with your love, your daughter will bloom right into a appropriate angel.
2016-11-23 19:10:48 · answer #7 · answered by iatarola 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How could you possibly say that your own child is ugly... woman... you need to do some serious soul searching... because I think that you are the ugly one... what you look like on the outside doesn't matter, it's the inside that counts.... I'm not a mother but I am a daughter and I can tell when my mother is disappointed in me... I just can't understand how a MOTHER could say this about their child! You are repulsive! How can you send your child away because of her looks! You should be thankful that you have a child and that she is healthy... I am so glad all people are not like you... your daughter is not ugly... you are!
2007-01-31 15:35:05 · answer #8 · answered by iheartbassets3 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Let me tell you something,you uppity snob. You and your husband do not deserve the beautiful gift that God has given you. If you think your daughter is ugly,then I feel sorry for you. I would not want to be in your shoes on Judgment Day. As a mother I am mad as hell that a pompous *** like you would say that about your daughter. If you think like that about your child you are a horrible mother. And if the truth be known, you and your husband are the ugliest people on the planet!!!!
If you are ashamed of your daughter, let someone that really loves that girl take care of her!!!
2007-01-31 23:01:02 · answer #9 · answered by willy-wonka 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I sure hope this is a fake question.
If not, you need serious help. What is a parent supposed to do? A parent is SUPPOSED to love their child reguardless. I could never imagine not loving my child because of looks. And being a "beauty queen" is so overrated. Everyone is going to be old, wrinkly, and gray someday. I can't even believe you call yourself a parent.
Oh I really hope this is just a fake question... It would be a pretty sad world to have messed up people like you in it..
2007-01-31 15:11:41 · answer #10 · answered by Annamarie 5 · 5⤊ 0⤋
this is sick, i hope it's a joke. your daughter probably cant make friends due to the massive self-esteem issues caused by having a monster like you for a mother. The answer to 'what's a parent supposed to do?' is LOVE YOUR CHILD UNCONDITIONALLY. just because you, a self described 'attractive and high maintenance' person (which to me reads as insufferably arrogant and self absorbed..) think your daughter is ugly doesnt make it true. You should have a good hard look at yourself to find the true meaning of the word 'ugly'.
2007-01-31 15:13:28 · answer #11 · answered by majickgypsy 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋