How do I get over his death?

Question

In March of last year, my Miniature schnauzer Flash died. At the time he was living with me, but I had depression and kept shouting at him.
During the last few weeks, he wasn't able to control his bladder. I thought he was just being naughty, but it turned out he had no control over it. I feel so guilty about the way I treated him.
My mum and I brought him to the vet and he told us that Flash would have to be put down. I was so shocked, I couldn't bear to be there when it happened. He looked at me from the table as I left and every now and again I see his face in my mind and the feelings come back again. He was my best friend and I don't know how to stop feeling like this.

Answer 1

I just lost my cat Meep, who was my best friend in the whole entire world. He was such a weird cat that he played tag. I swear! But at Thanksgiving we left to visit relatives for a couple days and Meep ran out the front door before we left. We figured our neighbor would just feed him for us, cause she feeds him anyways. So we came back and he hasn't been back since. Every 2-3 days we checked the pound and the pound in the next city, and I put up flyers everywhere. A little after that my sisters cat of 16 years and mine of 15 years (we had her a year before I was born) died on my bed in my lap. My sister is away at college so she didn't get to see Princess. We were both terribly destraught. This was all at the end of 2006. Princess was an inside cat, and hated other animals, so she got stuck with me in my bedroom. She slept next to me or on my head every single night. lol.There was one day that my mom and I decided that this trip to the pound was going to be our last to search for Meep, and we found a siamese cat (just like Meep) who was going to be put down the next morning. She was so beautiful, so nice, and looked like she would never hurt a fly. We adopted her and she is my new bedroom head sleeper cat/bestfriend. She also hates other animals just like Princess so shes stuck in my bedroom. Even though she doesn't play tag with me like Meep did, she is always there when I need her. I know you will soon find another pet who will help you through your time of need. Flash probably doesn't remember you yelling at him, he probably remembers you most playing with him, and there for him before he was put to sleep at the vet. Theres a song called "When Somebody Loved Me" by Sarach McLauchlin that reminds me so much of Meep, maybe it will help you.

Answer 2

I know exactly what you are going through -- my 10 year old "Scooby" died a few months ago in a freak accident & it just crushed me. I am truly sorry for your loss.

Speaking from experience, I would wait at least 6 months to a year because a new dog is not going to make you feel better at this point. When your pet is your buddy for such a long time, trying to replace him is not the right thing to do. I did that only once and it actually made me feel worse because the replacement was nothing like the original. So, give yourself time to grieve.

Answer 3

Don't feel bad, you should heed the word of the people who responded to your question. Thank you for sharing your story. Everyone who reads it will think twice if they end up in a similar situation. I have never owned a pet until now: my puppy is 10 wks old. Your story can help other dogparents be more aware of what their dog is going through. I know I will think twice before I assume the worst of my dog (I would have thought my dog was being naughty too, if I were in your situation). I hope you tell more people about this. Telling other people about your experience with Flash can help a lot of people, not to mention yourself! A lot of good can come from sharing your story. Good luck!

PS: Flash now lives on in my memory too.

Answer 4

depression is a hard thing to deal with and often ur mind will make u believe things that arent necessarily true, such as ur little dog, flash having no control of his bladder and u thinking he was doing it to annoy u. dont be hard on urself for shouting at him - u were going through a hard time and u werent to know. the harder u r on urself, the easier it will be to slip back into the depression. surround urself with happy things, such as photos of u and flash in happier times. remember also, that dogs have a keen sense for things like this and flash probably knew that u were going through a tough time. good luck and i hope u feel better! =)

Answer 5

I am so sorry for your loss! I am a pet lover... I cry when I see commericals and shows about abandoned animals. You dog still loves you. He is in doggie heaven...don't be too hard on yourself. You took good care of him. Why not get another dog to feel the void. You will never forget your little buddy. But don't sit and suffer....try to go on and like I said get a new pet.
I had to have a cat put down years ago and had another one die. I was devistated. I replaced both of them and fell instantly in love with their replacements. I now have 2 cats (*one is the replacment of the one that died and the other is her kitten) and a lab/shepard mix. They are not pets, they are family.
Take care!!!

Answer 6

I had a golden retriever named Cody he passed away in 2003, I will always love remember him.When he died it was like losing a part of the family. We now have 2 catsbut it is not the same. Idon`t want to get that attached to another animal it really does hurt when they die.Ihope your depression is better now, Ihave a couple of friends who suffer from depression, I know it can be rough.

Answer 7

You never get over it but time will heal your heart. He knows that you loved him. You had no way of knowing that he wasn't able to control his bladder. I don't know if you are religious, but sometimes it helps to think you will see him again someday, wherever we end up after this.

Answer 8

I'm very sorry for your loss..I had a dog named Rosco who was one of my best friends also, Suddenly it seemed he was sick so we took him to the vet and his kidneys were failing. It was one of the hardest things to come to grips with that he was going to die. I still too remember his face when I had to say good bye and hearing him cry when I was leaving the vets. I would say the best thing for you to do is to always remember him and just dont forget. He loved you and he knew you loved him. So just never forget him. its hard when we lose something we love.

Answer 9

I am sure your dog knew that you loved him. Dogs don't hold a grudge and I am sure he was grateful for you letting him go when he was ready. So try to forgive yourself. And think about the good times you had with him. He was a good friend for you and he would not want you to be sad.

Answer 10

by potential of definition, dying is the ceasing of all applications of existence. After respiration, heartbeat, and proposals interest give up, the existence-tension steadily ceases to function in physique cells. dying is the alternative of existence. dying is something very hardship-loose spectacular now. besides the undeniable fact that, that isn't the case interior the destiny. (Revelation 21:3,4)