I have two boys ages 6 and 4. How do I help them stop arguing? It starts the second they wake up.?

Question

The four year old just screams at the top of his lungs about everything. The six year old teases him about everything. Help!

Answer 1

thats normal.just seperate them.

Answer 2

Hm. There are a few things you can do.

1. As someone said, separate them. However, this, in my opinion, is not the best option. Even though they are young now, they will not always have the luxury of getting away from someone who annoys them. Also, letting them 'duke it out' undisturbed isn't good either. This teaches them that disputes, whatever the nature should be handled by them. In life, they will need to go through the proper channels of authority to complain about someone elses' behavior. They can't constantly argue with or seek revenge on a co-worker. That would get them fired.

2. It's hard, but take a look at the interaction between you and your significant other. Do you argue often? Or do you argue or get annoyed at one another about trivial things? Do you shout at one another? Lead by example. Get together with your partner and agree to calm interactions. Find ways to work on your own individual listening and communication skills. Children imitate what they see. The children should start to pick up the example, and it will be easier for you to reprimand their behavior, as you (and your partner) are not guilty of it yourselves.

3. Do you allow them to watch tv shows or films or the like with lots of arguing and violence? Sounds prudish, but such things do have an affect on young impressionable minds. Like I said before, they emulate what they see.

One can't control every aspect of their lives, but you can teach them the listening and communication skills they need to get along with others. If they can't do it at home, they will have a hard time doing it outside of the house. Everything will frustrate and annoy them.

Answer 3

My boys are 6 and 4 as well, they do argue but generally are best of mates, they have shared a room since the youngest was 18months. I just ignore the petty little things they fight about, but if its something more sinister and someone is likely to get hurt from the actions of the other, thats when i step in, I have resorted to seperating both of them and making each sit on a chair with their backs against the wall facing each other, there is to be no talking etc, until i step in again,. I normally leave them there to think about their actions for 2 - 5 minutes! then i make them hug and apoligise to each other! Very rarely now do i use this, as they learnt really really quickly from the first time it happened! just as long as you explain in simple terms the consecquences of their behavior to them so they know why this action you are taking is happening! I think it is a total waste of your time and energy if you react to every little arguement! being brothers they will learn to get on! as much as mine fight, when someone else hurts his brother, the other steps in. Not long ago my boys went to their cousins house who happens to only boy among 3 girls! and hes the same age as brother 2 (4 yrs) the cousin punched and pushed brother 2 and made him cry magerly! Brother 1 (aged 6) turned around and did the same thing back to cousin and said, there how did you like someone doing that to you! The look on cousins face was priceless and needless to say he doesnt do that anymore! My boys have been tought that just because someone hits u, doesnt mean that its ok for u to hit back, ! but sometimes it does no harm. Another thing is each time ur boy (4) screams hold your hand up like a stop sign and say " Stop your screaming, I dont like it" and get him to do that to his brother but say" STOP I dont like you teasing me" In the end brother will understand it all! I have learnt many great tricks from a lovely kindy teacher! but honestly your stressing yourself out if you react to every little arguement they have!

Answer 4

My daughters are the same age and the same thing happens with them. I just seperate them or if it was really bad put them both in time out and lecture them about having more respect for each other as they are sisters and will always be sisters (when angry at each other they will say they arent sisters anymore) and they wouldnt like it if someone else treated them that way.
It works for a bit but they are still kids and will always fight.
Good Luck with it.

Answer 5

my foursome are all very close in age so early on they would argue about EVERYTHING. it takes A LOT of patience. (yes sometimes its just easier to break it up and separate them). but patience helps. You have to remain very calm, come to their eye level and express to them how you want them to treat eachother. What is the problem? Does one want something the other has? Then make that child ask calmly and politely. Have the other child answer calmly and politely. After you do this a few days - they'll start to get the hang of things as to how they are supposed to treat eachother with respect. Also lots of praise when you catch them being good to one another.

Lastly, there are times when they need to learn to work things out for themselves. As long as they are not beating eachother up - sometimes leave them to their own devices. If they come to you with something very petty - tell them they need to work it out.

Answer 6

i regret to tell you but unless you incorperate spanking into your routine this is how you are going to live. when my children turned three the problems started. one day i realized that i was spanking my daughter once a day. i would attempt to settle things in other manners all day and then end up spanking her and then she was satisfied and responded in a positive manner the rest of the day. so, i decide and told her that every morning when she got up out of bed i was going to spank her and that the rest of the day would be taken care of. i spanked her for three mornings and hardly ever had any more trouble out of her to this day...she is 34. my sons now 29 and 20 where a little more hard headed and i put that down as male. every morning that they woke up and started trouble as soon as they did i spank them...no more talking. that had been done when i explained the daily spanking plan. if you don't like this plan, and i know that many people don't like spanking...but that is why today there are so many rude and unruly children. anyway if you don't like it, all i can wish you is good luck, you are going to need it.

Answer 7

You need to explain to the 4yr old the 6 yr old is trying to push his buttons.... Tell the 4 yr old is he stops over-reacting to the 6 yr old, the teasing will slow down, and eventually stop.

(I have 6 yr old twin boys..... trust me)

Answer 8

it is normal for two young boys to do this to one another. try to sit both of them down and tell them that this is not ok. do this each time they do this and see if it works. if it don't then try some form of discipline to get them to stop and do that each time they do it. eventually they should learn not to because of the consequences of their actions. this should not be as severe of a problem as they get older if you catch the problem now. hope this helps. good luck.

Answer 9

try keeping them apart and give them interesting things to do that will keep them occupied and away from eachother.. then possibly later try looking for a good activity that will get the older brother to help his younger brother.

Answer 10

A good hard spanking never hurts.