Is it wrong 2 go back 2 the person that hit you but you love them?

Answer 1

dont do it hun, i used to be in exactly same situation and then i became pregnant with his child and he threatened to kill her before she was born, this isnt a man you are with its a coward and bully, dont go back with him no matter how many times he says he will change, because im telling you now he will never change. it took me 2 yrs to realise what i had got myself into and now im out i will never go back, i now having a loving boyfriend that does everything for me and he will never hit me.
Just stay away from him because maybe one day he will do more than just hit you, and then it could all be too late, goodluck hun and if you need anyone to talk to email me.

Answer 2

YES!!! This is wrong beyond the telling of it! This is wrong on multiple different levels. 1) He's just going to keep hitting you again and again until he kills you. 2) If he hits you, he doesn't love you. Period. No matter what he tells you. 3) Technically, it's assault. His @ss should be in jail. If he hit you once, you should have filed a police report and then filed for a restraining order. 4) If you go back to him after he hits you, then you are sending him the message that his violent behavior is acceptible, WHICH IT ISN'T. Do you want this loser to think that it's ok to keep hitting you? 5) People don't change. Ever. If he says that he'll never do it again, he's lying. He's gonna do it again. If he says that he "can't help himself", he's a lying dirtbag and you should know better. 6) Did I mention that if he hits you he doesn't love you? Leave now and don't ever go back. Ever. And consider buying a gun. And some mace. And a baseball bat. And tell your parents and the police and all of your friends.

Answer 3

Wrong? not necessarily the right question, you need to ask what you are willing to accept? what you think is right for you? What you want for yourself and what you think you should have.

Think about this, what do you want from the relationship? And if it is one that leads to a family what about the safety and well being of that family?

I know of a more than one situation where a man hit his wife. case one, he at 6'4 hit his 4'11 wife, she calmly got the butcher knife from the drawer sat in the rocker and said "you have to go to sleep sometime" He stayed away for ten days. Yet after 16 years of marriage never raised a hand to her again.

The other situation the woman left threw the guy out of the house, he knew he was wrong and went to counselling, they were separated for over a year, but they got back together and the counselling helped he never raised a hand to her again.

Another situation he kept saying he was sorry he would get help, she would go back, and get hit again, this was cycle that continued and even got worse. Her son learned to be a violent bully just like his father's example and she doesn't understand why.

Another situation where things kept getting worse, she tried to get help he would find out she tried to get help and beat her for it. Then one day he went to hit one of the kids, within a week she walked out and into a shelter. With nothing. It took years to get things together lived in an apartment with nothing but beds for the kids for over a year because she was struggling to afford to take care of the kids. Eventually things got better. She said she wouldn't give up having her kids for anything but it would have been easier if she walked out when she was younger and had the resources to afford to.

Her advice to all women make sure you have a secret stash of cash / bank account that the man in your life doesn't know about no matter how good the relationship may seem so you can protect yourself if you need to.

Unfortunately there are to many stories like the last two, and not enough like the first two.

If a woman loves a man it doesn't mean she should accept being abused.

But when the relationship is new and she is not trapped, that is the important time to ask yourself what you want from the relationship and life, and what are you willing to settle for?

Answer 4

Sometimes love is just not enough.. After he hits you, I'm sure he's really really sorry, and he'll never do it again, he swears, but I'm sorry, it's just not true. He will do it again, it's just a matter of time.
If you really love him, which obviously you do if you didn't go running for the door, tell him to get some help. If he gets help, and you can see the change in him down the road, then you can maybe possibly consider just a little bit, going back to him. But not now. He doesn't deserve it, and you deserve way better. Be strong and do the right thing.

Answer 5

Yes it is wrong too go back to a person that hit you, even though you love him. is not going to stop him from hitting you. and there will be more to come if you stay with him. find someone that will be kind and not hit you for any reason, it seems that the person who hits you has a problem and needs help. good luck.

Answer 6

Yes, for your sake and theirs.
Yes, until you know, not feel, 100% that it would never, ever, occur again.
That 100% means 100%. I am sure that you can look at a picture of yourself and know quite readily that you could not be mistaken for a punching bag. To allow yourself to be in a close relationship in which the other has any (more than %) physical or psychological inclination to cause you injury is your allowance. If you have that propensity, then you must do inner work as extensive and as long as you need, to rid yourself of that. In the meantime, stay away and work on your esteem and your ownership of boundaries that allow esteem not to be offended. If the other does the same amount of inner work, then you both will have adopted and implemented healthy boundaries, and you won't be asking the question anymore.

Answer 7

If you love yourself, you won't.

It's not a safe situation. Someone who hit you once is going to do it again. What makes you think it's going to be any different? Because he promised never to do it again? You know in your heart what those promises are worth. This person has a problem inside them that hoping and wishing and promising isn't going to change--and you can't change it, either.

If they are willing to recognize the problem and get counseling to change it, you could consider getting back with them if the counseling progresses well and the counselor agrees that he's ready for that. But until that point, expect to be walking back into exactly the same situation. Well, not really the same, because it's only going to progress and get worse over time.

Answer 8

it's not wrong and it's not stupid.true love demands forgiveness and at the same time abhors abuse.let him understand this,however i'll be frank...he can hit u again.it's all about second chances though...he might want it to make it up to you.it's a chance u'll have to take.if u don't...well,u might never know.assuming he's willing to correct himself,u should do the same.look at this as a chance to know yourselves better and understand each other more.no man is perfect,he might be a cheat,a drunkard or something worse but anybody can change.if u love him,it's worth taking that risk.i've answered this assuming he has hit u only once.if it's his behaviour,don't go back till he has gotten professional help else u'll run away again.good luck.

Answer 9

Even masochists need a break now and then! Normal people should get away from that type of treatment ASAP! You are confusing love with some twisted idea that has been put in your head, God knows how! If you go back to him, you are doing so with the full knowledge that you will never break his addiction for mistreating you and that you can wind up hospitalized or worse at any given moment. Love yourself and lose this loser like yesterday.

Answer 10

I know you love him and you may even think that you can change him, but it doesn't happen that way. I was in a relationship like that and the moment you take him back it gives him reason to continue. I loved him with all my heart, infact I'm still in love with him, but it's not good for ME to be with him. HE has a problem and he needs to face it and fight it or he needs to FIND a different punching back. When you take him back or go back, you're giving him approval to hit you again. He will seem so sincere and so true when he apologizes and it doesn't mean he doesn't love you....he just doesn't respect you and that comes hand in hand with love.

Answer 11

No, not unless that is what you want: To be hit over and over again!!!! LOVE IS NOT ENOUGH OF A REASON TO STAY IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP; and yes it is abusive even if he hit you one time. Do you really love this person? Really or are you so desperate and afraid of being alone that you would settle for unacceptable behavior? I don't know any source of knowledge , whether divine or intellectual that includes physical abuse part of its definition of love. Do you???? If you find one I'm sure there are plenty of people who would be interested this.
There is absolutely no excuse for this person to have put their hands on you. That is not the correct way to handle problems and obviously this seems to be the method this person chooses to handle their problems with you.
GET THE HELL OUT OF THE RELATIONSHIP AND STAY AWAY! IT NEVER NEVER NEVER GETS BETTER NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES THIS PERSON PLEADS AND PROMISES NEVER TO DO IT AGAIN.
Do you know there are people with whom you can be in a relationship with that will not hit you??? There are, so stop wasting your time with this loser who thinks its OK to hit on people they may claim to love and spend your valuable time finding someone that will treat you well. YOU DON'T HAVE TO SETTLE!!!