my future husband is very spiritual he was raised in the church but i wasnt-could this work?

Question

my future husband was raised in church-his brother is a pastor,aunt is a minister,the family is very religous,im not.i sometime dont understand what they are talking about.he feels god is calling on him to fullfill his purpose,what if that is to be a minister?he used to live together that always bothered him he wants to marry.im in ky and he is in ca.he wants me to move back to ca with him but i need to care for my dad.i want to spend the rest of my life with him but i know my heart is telling me to stay and take care of my dad.if he is being called to do gods work-he can do it anywhere-right?he siad he has convictions-what is that?i dont understand alot of this.he has had spirits visit him-the night his sister died.their church speaks in toung-and gets slain by the spirit-why dont i feel what they do?i cry alot at church-i get very emoutional. please help me understand.

Answer 1

Hello Melissa, this is Tenesha Perea. Yes, your husband can do God's work anywhere.The only way God can be limited is by the person. (If your Future Husbands pushes God away). My husband believes he is also called to be a youth pastor and then eventually a senior pastor of a church, but only he can determine where God wants him to go and me as his wife we pray and believe together, because God will give you a peace of mind and heart if it is right .we are a team. In the Bible God says the woman was made to be the man's helper. The Bible says that when a man and a woman get married they are to leave their family and cleave to eachother. Now, don't get me wrong, but he seems to be a great guy, but he shouldn't push anything on you and you on him either. God doesn't make us do anything, we choose as humans/people. It's great that he has convictions-sense of right from wrong based on the word of God. In order for God to do anything ,for you to experience him, you must make Jesus, Lord and savior of your life. Once your relationship is right with him then you will get the blessings that God only gives to his children who have a relationship with him and are obeying him through his son- Jesus. Speaking in tongues is something God gives to his children. It's a sepcial language ( Heavenly Language) that only he can understand. Think of it this way. When you are out of words and don't know what to say to him Pray in that language. That's one reason why he gave it to us. He says it's the perfect prayer. The Holy Spirit is speaking through and for us, because in all reality we know not what we should pray for. Humans are selfish and greedy.God uses that language to help us or someone else in their lives. Look up intercessor-in webster dictionary.There are many different spirits. I can't tell you anything until I know more about that experience he had, but,one thing to remember, God is not all about feeling. He actually says that we should not walk by sight/feeling, but by failth alone, by what his word declares. Some churches are more charismatic than other. One thing is that God is not going to distract others from receiving salvation. So if people are being distracted and miss what God has for them that is when it is wrong. God doesn't want for the people outside of the churches to think we " believers" are wierd or Physco. When you cry that isGod reaching out to you wanting to speak and live inside of you, so he can help you. DO NOT BLOW HIM OFF. get understanding from a Godly person. He's known you since before you were born, he jsut wants for you to know him back. There is so much he has to offer.If you need anyhting else please feel free to e-mail me back.

Answer 2

Everyone, when they are in love, is willing to ignore all the danger signs of a difficult marriage. Love doesn't conquer all, at least not after the first year or so. You have to look through the fog of love and see if the two of you are really going to be going in the direction you want for YOUR life. If you don't do it now, you'll have to do it later and if you have kids at that point, it will even more difficult to get your life back on track.

Your life and wants and needs are more complicated than what can be put in a paragraph in Y!A, but you need to think a bit and talk to friends who can see things a little more objectively and then LISTEN.

Answer 3

I was like him, and that was being a horrible person. BUT, i think he may be much worse than i was. I know it would be very hard to break with him, but i think you know you should. Please realize you are giving yourself too cheaply to someone like him. No one should make you feel as you do in church. The knowledge of religion is easy to pick up, and the way you live is more important than what you know. I'd tell you a joke, no i will tell you one.
A guy i knew became born again, and started preaching at work. I don't mind what a person believes but don't want to know on the job. I asked him if any of the Prophets in the old bible were married to a prostitute. He got mad. I told him to look it up, because there was one whose wife was a temple concubine.
People who profess knowledge of their religion, and a greater spirituality should know stuff like this. Although a true believer who is kind to others doesn't need this.
Get out girl, for your future children if not for you.

Answer 4

Hi, I'm a pastor and I'll give you my go.
a) If the husband is the believer first, then it usually settles out in the marriage. Unless he uses it as an excuse to emotionally abuse rather than relate.
b) If you have lived together, but have now broken that tie, your marriage success factor has just gone up 50%. Check in with him about visiting in CA but not sleeping together. You'll find out if it is hormones or his heart calling.
c) Speaking in tongues is a very ancient 3000 or ecstatic experience. It is a connection of God's Spirit w/ ours. If there is no interpretation offered when a 2nd person is present, it is a cause of alarm. That scenario is spiritual one up man ship.
d) I am sorry his sister died - but having spirits visit him should not have happened. It sounds like an attention getting device in a family where attention flows to the ministers.
e) Slaying in the Spirit is real - it speaks of a deep, deep, internal connection with God. Like everything that can be good, it can also be used to gather attention - very dramatic. My wife has had it happen and the connection meant a great deal which she cherishes, but no message / meaning came with it.
f) You are in obedience to the 4th commandment. At this point, your dad is still the one scripturally in charge of you. Let this guy come to you.
g) If he cares FOR you as his mate, then he needs to clarify what this calling is, ease your legitimate questions, speak to your dad for permission and explain his intentions.
h) If you love him, but y our heart is speaking about your dad, I would strongly encourage you to stay put in KY.. I presume you notice that you have not written 1 thing about his carrying for you, your faith understanding, your dad, or his compassion for your confusion in this. Sometimes what we write can tell us more than we realize.
I've been a pastor to pastors for years. I am not one to judge, but this sounds like a young man struggling to compete in the I'm Holier Than Thou game w/ his family - while trying to do it his way on the side.
NO Go.

Answer 5

I'm guessing he is Pentacostal. Convictions are his beliefs. Things he will not budge on in life. You don't feel whatthey do because God shows himself to each person in his unique way. Just know that if you have accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior you will be ok. You don't have to speak in tongues or get slained in the Spirit to go to Heaven. You need to stay with your Dad. I've been there. While the Bible does state to cling to your husband once you get married. Stay with your dad and take care of him. God may be calling him to a specific area. If he haas had Spirits visit him I'd be very very careful. The majority of spirits seem to be Angels of Light but in reality from Satan. If I were you I would tell him I'm taking care of my dad and tell him to do what he ha to do.Hope I've helped.

Answer 6

You two need work this out before getting married.

1) How old are you? If you have to stay home to care for your dad, I'm guessing you're between 18-24, but that's just a guess. Caring for your dad can be taxing, and if it's what you feel you need to do, then you need to do it.

2) Have you communicated with him about the differences in religion and spirituality? While it may not be a big thing NOW, it's going to be huge once there are kids involved. Would you be okay with your kids being raised in a church?

Basically, you two need to talk this out and figure out what works best for the two of you as a couple. Before even discussing the marriage further, take the step to figure this out. Marriage isn't going to take away all these argument or differences.

Answer 7

Don't go......I'm a seasoned Christian and a marriage counselor....Don't go...Even your "future husband" should know the disaster that await your union. The bible he will preach out of states very clearly that a Christian should only marry another Christian....I can give you many references...but more importantly.....You have what you believe to be an obligation to your father in Ky. If this man in Ca. really is called to the ministry let him establish his ministry without you....this will give you the time to help your father and give him the flexibility to travel and grow to the place where he can support the 2 of you.....If he argues this he is not sincere about the ministry or his love for you

Answer 8

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Answer 9

Starting with the point that you're questioning it, it's because you don't believe that will work.
You should tell your "future husband" what you think, and explain all your feelings to him, tell him about your dad.
There's a lot of men out there and only one dad!
A relationship between a men and a women must happen when both of them have the same goal and objective in live, if not, will not work and it will bring a lot of problems. You're not even married and you are already crying about it.
Make your own decision, but this is my opinion.

I liked someone from a different religion and believes, with different objectives in life and he liked me, we were going out.
But because of all of these I cried a lot, it was my head, myself against my heart, that was very painful. I said to him that was over and he kept insisting and insisting, that made it harder.
But now its over, I'm OK, life keeps going!

Answer 10

I wonder about your future husband. He is being quite disobedient now. There are many Scriptures that prohibit the relationship between a believer and a non-believer.

I have counseled so many who are involved in these disobedient relationships. The believer is so often either heart-broken over their spouse's unbelief, or they themselves become ineffective in their own calling and ministry. Either way, the devil is satisfied.

By unequally yoking himself to you, he has already caused both of you pain, which, if he had obeyed in the first place, would not have happened.

Normally, my advice would be to pray about it, but you aren't a believer, so there would be no point. That being said, I must tell you that this is just a snapshot of future problems in your marriage. You will get upset with him for his religious devotion and he will be upset at your unbelief.