I dont know what to thing:( please help me!?
I dont know what to think?
My boyfriend is 26 hes a 1st LT we have been talking about getting married because he might be getting stationed in Germany! So when we were in Indiana at Christmas with his family he said we will go to the court house if I get the job because I wont go without you. But now it looks like he is going to be getting the job and it stresses me out and scares me cause he will be gone for 2 years. When he told me I stayed strong and I was kidding and I said you cant go without me and he said well you cant go. So I dont know if he is just saying that or if he is going to propose and hes just trying to throw me off. Please help. Let me know what you guys think! Thank you
2007-01-31 07:23:38 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I completly agree with Pink Denial.
I say, go with him! Germany is A LOT OF FUN! and as an officer he will be handsomely compensated and will have no problem taking care of you.
Now, a word of warning...german girls are pretty and extremely liberal, so either get married, get engaged or go with him as is, but don'f be a fool to remain in the USA waiting for him for two years.
More advisory, single Liutenants now go for 3 years single tours! Check on his orders and check on the tour lenght. Even if you get married before hand, the Army will have to cut orders for you as well and this process may take 3 months or more (trust me, I know), but you don't have to wait for the papperwork.
As a single LT he's allow to have BAH and live in the economy. If you're a USA citizen then you can go with your tourist passaport and just stay with him there, or if you are amrried you don't need to wait for any paperwork, you can wait there.
Have fun in Germany!!!
PS1/ As a 1st LT he has to come back to the States for 6 months to complete the captains carreer course (depending of his branch it could be Fort Leonard Wood, Missouri (for Chemical, MP and Engineer)
PS2/ He already told you that he's not going ANYWHERE without you, that is so sweet. An engagment is coming.
Congratulations in advance and good luck.!!!
2007-01-31 08:33:02 · answer #1 · answered by Blunt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, tough situation. First off marry him only if your absolutely sure, he is the one you want, you are commited to him, and your are ready for marriage. More often than not people get married, only to realise months or some times even years later, that you didn't really get to know each other first, you have nothing in common, There may be qualities about your spouse, you don't like that are not evident in the "new" relationship stage of a relationship. What happens next is you are disappointed.
Never rush into marriage. It is a life long commitment to another person. For richer for poorer, in good times in bad times.Make sure you truly know who they are and what you want out of life. This is what my little sister is just now finding out after 7 years of marraige and two kids.
Secondly, if he is stationed in Germany. The majority of the time the spouses stay home and do not go to the bases with the men.
My sister's husband is stationed in Alaska and she wants to move back home to the continental U.S. Take your time and good luck. If you decide to go for it, well let me be the first to wish you congratulations!
2007-01-31 16:09:02 · answer #2 · answered by herbestgirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A 2 yr. duty station is long enough for a married man to bring his wife with him. He has to request it, even during a time of war. The war isn't in Germany so it is safe to move there. If he tells you anything else I would not believe him or would want to see the regulations or denied request that say "No, you can't go."
He may or may not propose. Marriage is a big step and he might be getting a little cold feet. Maybe you should warm them up.
2007-01-31 15:38:20 · answer #3 · answered by Poppet 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you indeed marry before he goes, it may take awhile for the paperwork but you should be able to live with him there.
You are going to have to ask the guy what's the deal? That's the only way you're going to get the answers to your questions.
2007-01-31 15:47:36 · answer #4 · answered by weddrev 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a dealbreaker situation. Either he takes you to Germany, or he goes as a single man. Don't waste your time waiting for him.
2007-01-31 16:22:14 · answer #5 · answered by Pink Denial 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would just talk to him and just because the army is paying for him to go.... that doesn't mean you would be approved to go even if you guys were married.
2007-01-31 15:35:21 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Why don't you just ask him?
2007-01-31 15:30:13 · answer #7 · answered by afarensis 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋