I'm 20 and have been on one date (about a month ago). The girl was really into me and gave me her #, we talked and I asked her out. We went out and ate, then it went downhill from there. I had no idea what I was supposed to do be it talking on the phone or whatever. I asked her out twice more and she canceled both times. Now we haven't talked in over a week, and I'm over her, but I keep thinking that maybe it's all my fault. Maybe I'm just not cut out to be with someone. I know that this is a ridiculous thing to think, but it crosses my mind nonetheless. What should I do?
2007-01-31 05:54:25 · 13 answers · asked by Wocka wocka 6 in Health ➔ Mental Health
hey hey, do not talk yourself down like that hun.
you know what your problem is..... your shy, there is nothing wrong with that.
since you said that you have only been on one date and your 20, you know what, you are a perfect catch, trusting and safe.
so stop putting yourself down you are not a loser and you shouldnt worry dear.
if only my boyfriend was like you id cherish him, you know hes a pig and all.
so stop it
stop it
stop it
ok
she will come along you just wait.
i really dont know what to say because i feel for you.
i myself had the same problem, i had really nobody, i thought i was a loser, and not cut out for a relationship or anybody.
low self esstem stays with us now matter how old we are, or how lucky we become, but sometimes that bagage that we carry with us needs to be on the sidelines for a bit..........right?
and no matter how we change ourselfs, it will never change, we deny it, dont show it, but its there.
hun your one of those lucky guys believe it or not, you seem sweet and respectful, and thats great.
you are just shy, and you need to be a little more stimulating if i will........you see what im saying.
good luck hun
2007-01-31 06:20:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not a loser!!!! You are just trying something that you have never done before.Dating is hard and you cannot base your whole experience on one date with one person.So many times in my life I have had guy friends give up on women and dating.They'd say" I'm going to become a monk".In my case I was going to become a nun.
I was married for ten years and said Thank God no more dating!, then I got a divorce and was scared out of my mind to date.I'm married once again and would not want to be in your shoes again.
Just keep trying,practice really helps.Try to be the one that suggests places to go.You start the conversation by asking things about her, give compliments when due and act interested even when you are not.Mostly you just have to be yourself but a gentleman.
2007-01-31 14:14:02 · answer #2 · answered by miss-snoopy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you are not a looser you are just new to the dating game. I can not really say for sure what went wrong on your day, but if I had to guess I would say you were nervous, you had no idea what to talk about and you had no idea how to act.
Relax and just be yourself. Talk about the things you like to do, talk about your hopes, dreams and aspirations or talk about the things that bring joy to your heart. Find out what she likes, what are her dreams or what brings her joy.
A first date should be considered something like a meet and greet. Use the first date to feel the person out and see if you click on a romantic level.
2007-01-31 14:10:05 · answer #3 · answered by wonderingwifenga 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep trying make friends and get use to being social with them and it might help your confidence. Keep getting to know girls and just accept that you can be friends if they don't want more.
Someday the right one will come along and you won't worry about where you might have gone wrong with things not working out with
other girls.
There was a song in I think the 80's about what you going to do when the right one comes along and your with xomdebody else. In other words don't push things, patience has its virtues in the long run,
2007-01-31 14:12:41 · answer #4 · answered by sapphire_630 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you're not.
Do it the best way: pray and ask God help you find the girl that He had chosen for you...and you'll be the happiest person on planet Earth. It can sound strange but it really is the best way to do it...look around, all the girls and boys that are choosing themselves are so unhappy, there are a lot of divorces...why? Because people think they don't need God's help...but we need HIS help. Don't we? Take good care!
2007-01-31 14:04:36 · answer #5 · answered by tatal_nostru2006 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are NOT a loser in any way, shape or form. You may just lack confidence but that will come with time and experience. When you are on your next date, make her feel special, talk to her, ask her questions and be interested in everything she tells you. Give her plenty of attention.
2007-01-31 14:03:46 · answer #6 · answered by Arizona Brit 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No!! You're not a loser!! You just haven't found the right girl yet, and/or you're just nervous. Have confidence in yourself, just because one girl cancels on you, doesn't mean that the next one will, too! Keep trying, and I know you can find the right girl.
Good Luck =P
2007-01-31 14:47:32 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You dont want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with you. There's many fish in the sea. Your only 20, no need to rush. Keep dating and you will learn more & more!
2007-01-31 14:03:36 · answer #8 · answered by graphix 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no you aint a loser.. its okay some times we click with others and sometimes we dont and thats okay. dont punish yourself now for something thats over in the past, its not your fault.just be open to find someone and you will when your are ready. good luck.
2007-01-31 14:04:03 · answer #9 · answered by GUESS GIRL 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you are not a loser .
you are only 20 years old and you have long way to go dont worrymember one thing always boys are winner always.
2007-01-31 14:02:37 · answer #10 · answered by farzaneh_sadeghi 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋