Should I do anything to try and stop a 10yr olds fear of pets?

Question

I just Married a woman who has a 10 yr old daughter who has the worst fear of pets I have ever seen ..It's tramatic to her everytime she gets withing sight of one. for over a yr now I have watched her and her mom fight everytime she gets out of the car if she sees a pet.she screams and cries and hits her mom trying to get back in the car. she won't go outside and make friends because of it ..I told my wife we should take her to see a Dr' maybe and was told no that we couldn't do her that way.that she is oly 10 and will grow out of it.I have seen her sit in the car in the driveway for hrs because she refuses to get out of the car..the school bus driver has had to take her back to school because she refuses to get off the bus if she sees a neighbors cat out in there yard .. what should I do

everyone is asking is something happened to cause this fear ..I asked that question when I 1st found out about the fear.her mom says nothing happened that she has always been affraid and never has been close enough for anything to happen.I have asked my daughter what and why she fears them she says she don't know she just does her uncle got 3 puppies and se hated them 1 got killed once and her exact words were GOOD 2 to go..and she meant it ..I thought up till then maybe getting a puppy that she would need to feed by a bottle and seeing if she could grow to see they are ok.. but she said it will die cause I wont take care of it..and I know she means it.Her mom will not even consider taking her to a Dr about this ..says she won't do that to her but i feel I have to help because tis isn't healthy ..and my daughter has Asthma real bad affraid it is going to cause a bad attack someday

Answer 1

This isn't just a fear ... it is a phobia... it is an unreasonable fear and should be addressed by a psychologist. It could be very detrimental to her ability to socialize. And it isn't something she'll just grow out of.

I'd be interested to know what sort of history she has with animals... was she attacked?... is it only cats and dogs, or do fish and reptiles count?

Answer 2

My friends daughter is that way towards dogs. She is 9 yrs old. I know fear is a real issue - but come on. It is so annoying to watch my friends daughter screaming everytime there is a dog near. I think my friend should have had her have more contact with dogs at an earlier age.

I have told my friend she should take her daughter to the zoo or SPCA where there are pets, but safely in cages to show there are no threats.

Has she ever been biting by a animal? Sometimes that can cause her fear!
Just let her know she is safe when there is a pet around, and that you wouldn't let anything happen to her.

Answer 3

Usually when a child has a fear of something. It is because of something happening to them In the past. Like maybe she caught part of a movie where a pet attacked someone like pet cemetary...or something like that.

I would say the best thing for it is start out with talking to her and ask her why she is so scared of them. Then once you find that out try to reassure her on what ever it is. Also don't try and force her to be around pets directly because it will only make it worse. Don't do it until she says it's ok to. If you do force her she will only revert back into fear 10x worse than before.

Everyone has a fear and fear is the bodies natural way of protecting itself. Like fear of the dark, Or fear of water. I would say go into a type of process begine with talking to her and then when she feels comfortable buy toys that look like pets. Also a virtual game with pets in it in the later stages might be helpful too. They have came out with alot of those games recently.

Also it would be good to explain to her that there is nothing to fear from pets and how they are just like us in a way. Most fear comes from either a bad experiance or from not understanding the other counterpart of the fear like not understanding pets for instance.

Try to gradually merge her and the pet world together and try to make her understand that not all pets are bad. The best thing though would be to understand the why she is scared of them. Then try to fix that problem.

I wish you lots of luck, And I hope I have helped you out.
:)

Answer 4

I would first try to find out WHY she's so scared. Has she been attacked? Something definately needs to be done... ASAP. At 10 she's not so little... seems to me like it would just get worse with time left as it is. Perhaps this is her way of getting attention? The trouble is, as the step-parent, you often have much less say. There may not be a lot you CAN do without mom's permission/support, so work on her then you two can figure it out together.

Answer 5

This is something she should have already grown out of. The mother needs to see that this is a phobia.. or worse it could be a sign of a mental disorder. This is nothing to put off. It will only get worse as she gets older. Pantophobia is a fear of everything. She needs counsiling and possible medications. Have your wife look up the meaning of these and see if she can relate her daughter to them.

Answer 6

what kind of pets is she afraid of?

try to get her use to having small pets around the house (NOT dog-- small dogs have a tendency to bite and nip AND NOT CATs-- cat movements are unpredictable) perhaps a rabbit or a turtle ... something that doesn't have a quick movements and will not discourage her to touch the animal or get closer to it ....


Try to find the root of why she's afraid; if she's ten , she should be vocal enough to tell you why she doesn't like something ...

take it day by day .... :)

erm , and I don't think anyone's too young to see a doctor ... sometimes it's just what she needs ....

Answer 7

Talk to her pediatrician. She shouldn't be afraid of all animals to that extent if she has a normal intellect. It is crippling her ability to function and the older she gets - the harder it is going to be to recover from.

Talk to your wife and explain to her how much you love her and her daughter and that you really want the best for both of them. There is nothing wrong with seeking help...there is something wrong with ignoring the problem.

Answer 8

Did she have some sort of traumatic experience with a pet before? If so maybe you could bring her to your local humane society and she can see how gentle and loving animals can be.