Why do all guys think that they can use you shamlessly?

Question

My boyfriend keeps on doing it and it is driving me nuts!

i love him but i really think that he is a dick.

Answer 1

Because you're letting him. And all men do not do that.

Answer 2

A lot of people fall prey to this idea that all the guys in the world are a certain way because all of their partners have been a certain way, whether they are all users, jerks, or cheaters. The fact is that if you keep picking these people as your partner, then it isn't their fault, it's yours. You have to realize what you want from a relationship, what you really want. If you're the kind of person who has a "type" of guy or girl that you like and all of your relationships end up horrible, then I wouldn't consider that your type, I would consider that consistently bad choices. Honestly think about the person your are about to become intimate with. Think of ALL aspects of a relationship, not just physical attraction or economic wellfare. THEN you'll be able to make smarter choices for yourself

Answer 3

If you allow your boyfriend to use you "shamelessly" then you are the one that needs to think about it, not him. What are you wanting in a relationship. Have you talked to him honestly? Don't shift the blame on him, it starts with you. If it is not what you want then stop it now before there is an unwanted pregnancy or worse. Respect yourself.

Answer 4

Sweetie, your boyfriend uses you because you allow him to. I know that you may not want to hear this but it is the truth. People, men and women alike only do things to us if we let them. If you want him to stop then put your foot down. Better yet, why are you still with him? Leave, I am sure that you can do better.

Answer 5

ever heard the some "my momma told me, ya better shop around" lol. you have to do alot of sorting before you settle on a boyfriend because theres alot of men that do, sounds to me you found a dud, break away an do yourself a favor, but look for one in a decent place, bars an stuff are usually a colaboration of duds. find you a decent one maybe at barnes & nobles, at the grocery store, or even on one of those online dateing places, but usue your intuition

Answer 6

Your boyfriend as you say "USES YOU SHAMLESSLY". And you ALLOW this to happen. The problem isn't your boyfriend it's YOU.

Answer 7

Generalisation relating to your own situation created by yourself because you let him get away with whatever it is. Dump him and try a gentleman - By the way - does he spend a lot of time in front of the mirror??

Answer 8

if he is using you he isnt worth it... not all guys are like this. if you keep dating guys that use you , you have to change your pattern. stop being so nice to them and stop letting them use you... the word is no... if it doesnt work out with this guy because he wont stop or he wont be with you nless he can use you learn to say no with the next or find a guy that can do things for you in return instead of it being a one way street... damn girl this upsets me... you shouldnt be treated that way and it doesnt seem like he deserves you to love him but you do so im not going to say to dump him. what i will say again is if things don't work out there are better out there... my husband is living proof...

Answer 9

Because you girls...who should know better...LET so many of us USE you shamelessly.
Case in point: You admit that you think your boyfriends a dick...yet you insist you love him. No wonder he treats you like sh*t.

Answer 10

Well, "all" guys don't. And, the 'use' depends on the dynamics...you could be potentially placing yourself in a situation to let yourself be used shamelessly, over and over again...just like your boyfriend "keeps on doing it."

Answer 11

Because you think whatever excitement he gives you is more than worth taking his crap to get....and let him do that to you.

It's NOT all guys who do that, but mostly "cocky" guys women put on a pedastal regardless of how they perform. Admitedly, guys can just as easily have the same problem with women that you have with your boyfriend.

Look at this article if you think your attraction to him has anything to do with "having a certain look that draws you to him that you can't explain":
http://news.yahoo.com/s/livescience/20070102/sc_livescience/howwomenpickmatesvsflings


Think of it this way, it's human nature to want "the best seed", but the best looking and best performing seed are often FAR from the same (and the best looking people, MALE AND FEMALE, exploit this prejudice to no end).

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Think about it, if a guy was seen cheating with many women and treating them badly wouldn't part of you think "d@mn...that guy must be great in bed if he can get away with that and still have girls on their knees for him".

You just have to remember...a guy who's looks say "good genes/exciting" may be lazy and far from worth it even though you look at his face and think "he must have the ability to be exciting (even if he never shows it): look at him". I have more than enough friends who look very masculine who girls love, but, guy to guy talk, have trouble staying in good enough shape or giving enough effort to get their girlfriends off more than once a night and, even though they gets flings easily, can't keep a girlfriend even when they really want to LONG TERM. Pretty pathetic, eh?


!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'd say just tell the guy straight out whatever crap he gives to you you'll give back, follow through with that and, if he still does not get that you're woman enough not to be "under his spell", just
ditch the guy and get someone with a better, stronger ATTITUDE. Because you need a strong guy who makes himself and people around him strong, not a strong-looking guy who can only back up his image by making people around him weak.

IF YOU'VE GOT AN EXCITING BUT POINTLESSLY COCKY GUY...REMEMBER IT'S NOT YOUR PROBLEM HE'S THAT WAY BUT YOUR PROBLEM THAT YOU ARE TAKING IT FROM HIM WHEN YOU DESERVE BETTER.