I just started a new job. Everyone is nice and polite to me. There is this one woman, whom is the same age as me. Who sits very close to me (so its very obvious), and fails to acknowledge my presence at all. Being that we are similar in age I have attempted to start a conversation with her, but it is like speaking to a wall. She says good morning to everyone, but me. She is outgoing with everyone, but me. She overtly ignores me. How should I deal with this? I’m a very nice person, I don’t feel right ignoring her in return, but at the same time I don’t want to waste my time dealing with her rudeness and aloofness towards me. How should I deal?
2007-01-31 01:36:56 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I hate to admit this...but I do this to one of my co-workers (I hope you are not her!).
The reason I do it is because she really bothers me and our personalities do not mesh. She is very naive, overly excited, happy and cheerful to the point where it annoys everyone in the office. She is STILL singing Christmas carols for God's sake. She talks about her wedding all the time (which would be cool if we were friends but we just work together). Among other things that just annoy me. It's a REALLY poor way of dealing with her and I am ashamed because I know better but this is why I do it.
I don't know you or your personality, but perhaps there is something about you that bothers her. On the other hand, maybe she just has poor social skills and is generally rude. I would just avoid her altogether - that would probably make her happier and you wouldn't have to deal with her!
2007-01-31 02:20:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It might be nothing you did personally. You are the 'new guy'. Maybe you got the job she was vying for, maybe she feels you're a threat to her job or position at the company in some way. Just say 'good morning' to her every morning, and if she doesn't respond don't worry about it, don't make an issue out of it in any way. She will eventually come around and get used to you.
2007-01-31 11:38:49 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You must have did something in the beginning that upsetted her. Find out how you accidentally rubbed her the wrong way and try to make amends. There must be a reason for her cold behavior toward you. Most likely it was a slight insult which you thought was no big deal, and she considered it a big deal.
2007-01-31 10:10:06 · answer #3 · answered by mac 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is such childish behavior. I could not work that close to someone with her attitude. I would approach her at the end of the day, so you are not taking time from your work day. I would make it as simple as I could by saying something like, "evidently you have a problem with me. You ignore me as if I do not exist and I have no idea why you treat me this way. Would you tell me why?? I find it extremely difficult to work this close to someone that ignores me." If she tells you why, that is good. Then you can deal with it. If she blows you off tell her you are going to go to the supervisor and request to move to another area because of the stress of working next to her.
Then go to the supervisor and explain everything and ask to be moved to another desk.
2007-01-31 10:20:57 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Simply say good morning to her as you would anyone else, eventually she will come around and if she doesn't so what...life goes on. We can't let people determine whether we will be happy or sad, if we do, it gives them control over our lives. You take that rudeness that she is showing you and turn it around by being sunshine every day. One day she will see how stupid she is behaving...and if she never does, guess what she is the one who remains empty on the inside.
2007-01-31 10:49:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Say "hello" as you would to anyone else but don't let her stress you out if she doesn't respond. Maybe you remind her of her sister/cousin/girl who stole her boyfriend...whatever. Nothing you can do will change how SHE feels. You can only change how YOU feel...so be your usual friendly self to everyone (including her) and accept that she'll never be more than the person who sits next to you.
2007-01-31 10:01:26 · answer #6 · answered by koreateacher96 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When I am being overtly ignored, I return the favor. I cannot waste any energy on someone so childish.
2007-01-31 11:36:30 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
girl you do not owe anything to her and you do not have to kiss her butt. you can be polite and say Hi just like you normally would, but other than that let her be. if she wants to act funky, that's her problem, and if you did something to her she should be woman enough to approach you and let you know what the problem is , instead of playing childish games. you are not the problem, she is
2007-01-31 12:29:39 · answer #8 · answered by butterfly234 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this has happened to me before at work and at parties. the person doing it is usually childish. normally their excuse may be that you are naive or very happy or too nice. but really they are extremely upset and unhappy individuals who can not relate to anything that isnt upset or unhappy. these individuals are extremely toxic. you can not talk reason in to them. they are losers in lifel. unfortunately all you can do is ignore her. but even if you do, shell continue to ignore you. she could even cause problems for you. i would request a transfer or talk to your manager or just try to move away from her bad energy. just be yourself. people like that are really just slugs in life. dont let it get you down. it speaks more about them than you. they are just low lifes that can only relate to low energy.
2007-01-31 12:28:02 · answer #9 · answered by wcarolinew 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I would just saying hello until she speaks. She may be very shy towards new people.
2007-01-31 11:13:41 · answer #10 · answered by missgigglebunny 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋