When a foreign name has a bad meaning in the local tongue, should you tell it to that person or ignore it?

Question

The thing is that the family name of a girl I know means "male genitals" in the local tongue. She can't change her family name, but she gets some weird looks...

Answer 1

I think you should tell her, because when she knows that her family name has a bad meaning in the local language, she can do something about it--if she can't change the name for whatever reason, there may be a way for her to pronounce it slightly differently--different enough to make people not think about what they think about now when they hear the name. I know I would want to know if my name were offensive in the culture I am in, because then I would have the choice to do something about it. Knowledge is power.

The consequence for not telling your friend about the bad meaning of her family name in the local language would be that people would give her odd looks, maybe snigger or laugh at her behind her back--and you wouldn't want people to do that to you.

It is important for you to keep in mind that in her own country and among her own people, maybe her family name is highly respected and honored. So, letting her know is, I think, an act of kindness. But it must be done with respect because you like that person and that person knows you have only her best interests at heart.

One trick that she (and her real friends) could use is to use her first name only in introductions. If she is asked in social groups what her family name is, she could say something like, "Oh, it's too difficult to pronounce, so I only use my first name--like Madonna does." And then she could say, "I have always thought your first name was really nice." That surely will deflect attention from her own family name. That will get her through a lot of situations smoothly. When friends are introducing her to others, they could simply introduce her by the first name, and if asked what her last name is, they could say, "Oh, it's too difficult for me to pronounce," and then change the subject by diverting attention to something nice about the person to whom she is being introduced. Diverting attention in a positive way is very powerful tool.

Well, Hadri, I hope this helps you.

Answer 2

We have a few of those among Eastern Cherokee people too. Although most have Irish or English last names, some have English translations of old Cherokee names. Bushyhead is a prominent family name, as is Goings/Goins. Then there's Swimmer, Contesky (it means "wasp") and a few others. They aren't vulgar like the example you gave, but they sound "odd" to most non-Cherokee.

Or take "Danagasta." It's a short form of danawa gosdaya, which means "sharp war." It was a pretty common woman's name for the longest. It's more of an expression meaning that someone's always chomping at the bit to do something.

Answer 3

You should tell her. That is what friends are for: to let you know the truth, however embarrassing it can be. She should be aware of what her name means to other people instead of wondering why they look at her in a weird way or even laugh behind her back. She could then decide to do something about it like pronounce her name in a different way, similar to her native tongue maybe. Knowledge is power.
It is like the President of Russia, Vladimir Putin. The word "putain"(same pronunciation) means "whore" in France but they pronounce it like the Russian do so it's OK.

Answer 4

imagine in case you'll the following situation. The racist criminal businesses whom attempt to take over parts of the U. S. for the individuals of Aztlan, and whom our authorities has supported via attempting to provide amnesty to, grow to be violent as they have publicly threatened. individuals strive against again to save their u . s . a .. because our resistance forces the authorities to convey residing house troops to regulate the factions, those troops should be added residing house from Iraq. less than the words of this act, shall we be declared subversives, have our assesets frozen and made criminals for protecting our u . s . a .. do not giggle, with any concept in any respect, everybody ought to confirm this as available. what number better rights will you sacrifice before you do not forget that our u . s . a . is doomed to grow to be area of the recent international Order. we will be ruled via the UN, our structure will be no better than the "valueless piece of paper" Bush pronounced as it, and we may be able to haven't any rights, elections, or say in how our lives are led. there is not any massive difference contained in the political activities. The republicans will weaken our rights and our u . s . a ., the Democrats will then be compelled to look to the UN to envision peace when we strive against again and that is over, u . s . a . could have lost its sovereignty. this isn't a comic book tale, look into how our rights are being slowly taken away.

Answer 5

Personally, I would want to know. True, there's nothing to be done to change it, but I guess someone who is insecure in themselves might think of making some slight changes. Myself, I would be less self-conscious if I knew why people were laughing, and I'd be able to laugh with them, rather than always wondering why people were laughing at me.

Answer 6

Ignore it. It happens and you don't expect people to change their names because of another tongue.

Answer 7

TELL HER!!! YOU wouldn't want to be in the same situation in another country!! Also, tell her to just give her given name, not her family name unless she has to. And if she DOES have to, you might want to teach her how to say something like "Strange family name, huh?" or something to that effect.

Answer 8

Well in High School we suggested to this boy that when he became an adult it might be best to change his name to Black.I don't know if he ever did because I never saw him again after High School.

Answer 9

Save him some embarrassment.
Do it tactfully, just in case he really does not know about the meaning.
This is better than not telling him at all.

Answer 10

Yes so they can find a less ridiculous nickname