i have started dateing a guy who has ginger hair, not my normal type but he is the most sweetest caring guy i have ever met and i like him, my family and friends are very loud, and although they wont mean it hurtfully, they will most likely end up taking the mick calling him the usuall names! i know if i asked my family they would not say anything its more my friends, what can i do as i dont want him to feel bad afterall its not his fault what colour hair he was born with!! (just for the record i like this guy and so i am not being shallow i just want things to go smoothly)
2007-01-30 20:39:27 · 26 answers · asked by sweetness 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Just warn him about the comments. If he's got a spine, they won't bother him.
2007-01-30 20:42:01 · answer #1 · answered by tony1athome 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
With love anything is possible and true friends won't be cruel with their words so you have to do one simple thing. Really simple when there is love-ignore it! The color of ones hair does not make the person.
My twin is ginger (Yet I'm not) and he will always point out something about them if they do it to him. He is short so also takes it because of his height but like said, he will give it back but not because it bothers them but so they don't feel as if can get away with it but he will take it until got 'beyond a joke' then make a comment. If that be ones big nose, big feet or whatever.
Nobody is perfect yet all are in our own image.
2007-01-31 05:01:02 · answer #2 · answered by WW 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey!!
God .. ya i can only imagine the comments.. The advise you're getting from everyone who's genuine is pretty good. I would do both.. speak to my friends & speak to him..
As one person said I am sure he has heard all the comments before..Not that he likes it or anything. If he does have a problem with it then he will have to toughen up a bit because people will never change.. i don't agree with the others on your friends...
I think they will continue on the remarks but not mean anything by it.. They sound like they are only having a laugh.. That is why you are friends with them right???
Stop trying to change everyone around you...I know you like this gut but you've got to let him see you for who you are... Who knows he might still like you... Chillout a bit, relax explain to him once that your friends & family are a bunch of piss takers but mean no harm or insult... The rest is up to him...
Cheers x
2007-01-31 05:10:35 · answer #3 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why dont you just have a quiet word on the side with your mates and tell them that whilst you know theres no malice behind the name calling that you feel its a bit hurtful to you new guy and it makes you feel awkward.
Genuine friends will stop this immediately.
As for the family - tell them the same thing.
At the end of the day its your happiness that matters and if hes treating you right then hang onto him girl! God knows nice guys are really hard to find!
Best of luck with things!
xx
2007-01-31 04:56:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He was born with his hair colour but you seem to have a problem with it though. You don't say how old you both are but I'm assuming that you're not straight out of school. If his hair is THAT ginger he has probably heard all the stupid p**s-taking jokes that there are and has probably got a good repetoir of good come-back lines. Let him deal with it.
2007-01-31 05:10:05 · answer #5 · answered by Shunter 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People with red hair are always having people making fun of them so I am sure he's heard it all before! Most redheads have answers ready for the jokers in my experience, but if your friends can't have the tact to shut up at least until they have got to know him better, then you need to look at why you call them friends.
Warn him what they are like, but say nothing to your friends in advance- that would sound as if you are apologising for him which you're not. He sounds as if he is making you happy.
2007-01-31 04:55:10 · answer #6 · answered by annie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Use the key of self admittance to alert him of the possible reactions he should expect from your family.
Let him know that you have a loud family and your family reacts to ginger hairs.
Let him understand that your family wishes no harm but it is just a culture for them to react like that.
Also chip in advice to your siblings of the danger in making jest of strangers.
Be sure your bf understands all these before introducing him to your family.
I'm sure it will all be fun.
Goodluck.
2007-01-31 05:01:55 · answer #7 · answered by whales 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i personally woudnt care less what my mates thought if you like him and he makes you happy then nothing else matters. dont get me wrong you need looks as well as a personality coz otherwise it would be pointless in the bedroom but if you like him and want to be with him im sure you friends will understand. To be honest you find out in situations like this who you true friends really are if they want you to be happy they will back you up 110% and wont care what colour hair he has as long as you happy!
2007-01-31 08:43:41 · answer #8 · answered by X 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would say that u talk to ur family and ur friends and tell them that what they do is really very bad ... talk to ur guy and tell him that he shouldnt bother , even thou i think that he must have a lot of this coments , not now with u but always
but ok i must admit that i have never seen someone with ginger hair so i have no much idea how it looks like but still its really bad to laugh at someone about outside looks
2007-01-31 05:06:41 · answer #9 · answered by athina68 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say tell your family and friends that you would like them to not take the mick out of him and that you really like him so you would prefer them to leave a better impression on him. I'm sure they'll listen
2007-01-31 04:44:18 · answer #10 · answered by anu 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You could give them a sign that your eally like this guy and you don't want them to comment about. Like my BF is the quite type. Anyway peopel used to make wierd comments and I would stand up for him and tell them to wait and tell those things in his face. With time they learnt to appreciate hima nd to look out for the best in him. And we are still together and there is nothing they can do about it.
2007-01-31 04:44:31 · answer #11 · answered by cynnie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋