I am 28 years old and I am currently living in Sweden, where I have been dating a great Swedish guy for the past 17 months, but I am thinking about breaking up with him because things are getting too serious since he has been talking about getting married lately, I love him sooooo much but I just don't think I could ever settle down. How can I get over being a serial dater and just settle down ?
Details:
-I am 28 and my boyfriend is 30, I am turning 29 in March !
-This is the longest relationship I have ever been in
-I have lived in the US(I am an American), Italy, France, and now Sweden
-I have dated more men then I can count :(
-My average relationship last about 3 months, then I usually dump them
-I have been proposed to 4 times
-I was engaged once for two months and then broke up with him
-I really want to have a husband and children (Many of my friends already do !!!)
-I am just nervous about getting married because I always feel like there might be something better
2007-01-30 18:11:29 · 10 answers · asked by Anna 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I have been living with my boyfriend for the past 4 months, which is a little weird since I have always lived alone. But I really like living with him :)
2007-01-30 18:14:14 · update #1
He is the perfect boyfriend :)
He:
-Always says I love you
-He cooks dinner better then I do :)
-He helps clean
-He never argues with me
-He is always there for me
-We always have a great time together :)
2007-01-30 18:16:09 · update #2
I look like I am 24 lol :)
2007-01-30 18:17:15 · update #3
If you want different results, you have to change the ingredients. You put flour, milk, eggs and oil in a bowl and stir it, you can ask for broccoli, but you'll get pancakes everytime!
Your dating habits aren't the problem(especially in Europe, I know!) neither is the number of men you've dated; it's your mindset you need to work on. Just start out with different parameters and screen the men you date a little differently and gradually(nothing happens overnight!), you'll get closer to your ideal. Life is a lesson that continues until you're out of the game...don't be so hard on yourself!
2007-01-30 18:19:54 · answer #1 · answered by wetdreamdiver 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Gee sounds like you have a dream guy. So what's the problem? Are you not attracted to him or do you have a commitment problem? Are you afraid that when you fall in love that the man will leave you? Is there some psychological thing going on with you. Something is the past that's haunting you? Only you can solve this problem. You're not getting any younger sounds like. So you need to figure out if you want a relationship or the thought of growing old by yourself. It's ok to be single forever. Many people in this world aren't meant to be married. You can live with the guy but if you have a fear of marriage then let him know that and just tell him you rather live together and not get married. After all marriage is just a paper commitment. Take care.
2007-01-30 18:21:16 · answer #2 · answered by Believe me 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There isn't anything better. All these guys are only human. You will never find the "perfect guy" because he doesn't exist. You could make a marriage to Frankenstein's monster work if you took it upon yourself to make the commitment to stay in it no matter what.
You're problem is that you afraid of commitment. You are afraid you are going to be hurt if you really give in to your love for someone so you hurt them before they get the chance to hurt you. Well, what can I say. You can either get help for your problem (counseling is a good idea) or you can remain alone and childless (unless you go the fatherless child route-NOT A GOOD IDEA FOR THE KID) for the rest of your life or you can do something about it. The choice is really yours to make.
2007-01-30 18:22:08 · answer #3 · answered by Ellen J 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A group of single ladys when shopping and they came across a store that sold men!
It hads 4 levels, at Level 1 it had a sign that said " here are the guys that wont clean, cook or tell you your pretty. and if you choose to got up then you cant turn around.
LEVEL 2 sign reads " will cook and call you beautiful but WONT CLEAN or put the toliet set up. remeber you cant come back."
So all the ladys couldnt believe they were actully going to get what they were wanting ALL along... THE ONE AND AMAZING GUY.... so they skiped level 3 and went straight to 4....
LEVEL FOUR SAID: " GODS GIFT TO WOMEN! ONLY WILL COOK CLEAN AND TELL YOU HOW YOU LOOK IN EVERY OUTFIT!
so excited all the women rushed to the door and slowly opened it.
Only to find out he was Gay.
so love what you got sounds like your pretty lucky!!!!
2007-01-30 18:25:18 · answer #4 · answered by SARAH D 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i dont need your details. but i would give you 3 ways of stoping the dating. 1. dont always concentrate on this subect but make yourself busy in other things which can give you the joy and help to the socity,2. dating alwys ends in sex and if happens to be so and later,he denies your relationship, would you bear the fact that you had dated this person. 3. dating is wrong because, you canot date the person unless and untill you know him and understands him and the same from him towrds you,because you also have dreems and feelings in life. life is important and it is the gift of God. you understand it's value in the last moment of death. so we should be wise. look for the man who know you fully and still accepts you as you are,after hearing all your past.( but not with pity relationship). marriage is not all. because your concious will be pricking you all the time of your past. and that relationship also wont exist for long time . therfore be honest,and dont be too emotional and dont trust all who come on way. and dont go by money and peronality,but go by humility and simplicity,then you will be the best. if you are happy about this answer do respond to me if not i will help you in other words.but dont give up life or end up in mess
2007-01-30 18:28:38 · answer #5 · answered by sudhakarsharon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was scared when I got married. But when you do, you'll find that you don't feel the same about dating anymore. You even love your mate even more as time goes on. I know that is hard to believe but it is true. If you really love him that much, take the next step and marry him. He sounds like a winner to me. If you don't want him ask him if he'd be interested in a 56 year old lady. LOL
2007-01-30 18:20:47 · answer #6 · answered by Fruit Cake Lady 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
dang girl! you need to just say no anyways..from what you said
-I really want to have a husband and children (Many of my friends already do !!!)
-I am just nervous about getting married because I always feel like there might be something better
you are just looking to get married cause everyone else is doing it?? so you really don't love him then..just trying to stay with the in crowd
and you feel like there might be something better..hahaha he should run! cause you are NEVER gonna be happy with what you have no matter what.
just say no!
2007-01-30 18:17:10 · answer #7 · answered by dipsydoodle 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Be satisified with what you have.
There will always be a better person out there, but WHO is the best for you?
Just list down what you like about him, and ponder if he is the one for you.
By the way, better get settled soon, woman loses "market value" after 30.
2007-01-30 18:14:08 · answer #8 · answered by IIDX Chem 3 · 1⤊ 3⤋
if you are not ready to settle down with your boyfriend and you care about him and he cares for you, you should probably tell him you're not ready if he really cares about you he'll under stand and maybe some where down the road you'll find out if he's the one for you
2007-01-30 18:50:36 · answer #9 · answered by ask away evie lynn.............. 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
GET MARRIED !
2007-01-30 18:16:54 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋