Guilty to Love him?

Question

I have this man that I've been with for almost a year now..
I tell him I love him a lot, but then I just told him.. I feel guilty for loving him because, and here are my reasons:
I see so many women when I go places..and I just see them and feel that if I was them, I would have more for my guy..Just more in general, like..Taller, or older.. (he's older than me so..)
It's not that I think I look bad, cause I think I'm fine..it's just that, I feel like I wish I was them..because he could love me different, or more than he does now..so that's why I say I feel guilty to love him.

Is this make sense to any of you?
If you know what I'm talking about, please give me some help..
I know this is hard to understand, or complicated , I'm not sure if I explained it right..but I tried.. It's hard to explain to..
But, if you've gone through this before, and can help me..then please do..
thanks.

Answer 1

Insecurity is normal. Even the "best-looking" model-types have a tendency to look in the mirror and think, "Ugh, how ugly," when we know it's not true about them. But they do it. And regular Joe's like me do it too.

What I'm trying to say here is: Accept the fact that NO ONE usually loves the way they look 100%. And begin to simply accept yourself for who you are and how you are made.

Every morning when you look into the mirror, think about it this way... God, you made me, and you would not have created a mistake, and you love me yourself, so thank you for making me JUST the way I am. Because it is truth -- you are made in the image of God, and you are made well.

There is a good chance that if your boyfriend could have those taller or older women, he would not like them nearly as much. He loves YOU. Let him love you, and honor him by loving yourself. (In hating yourself, you are also making a silent statement that you don't trust your boyfriend's judgment in staying with you.) Love yourself. Trust him and his judgment that you are beautiful and everything he wants. Life will be happier that way.

It may be time to take out a sheet of paper -- wait, we don't use paper anymore do we? -- ok... open up a blank document file... and begin listing all the positive things about yourself. Make # 1 be: "willing to be honest about the emotional mess inside myself." It takes a strong woman (or man) to admit to insecurity. Give yourself some credit just for that. Then list every other thing that is good about you. And don't tell me that you run short of 30 items or so, at least! Write them all down (errr... print off the list). And take the list to the mirror, and begin to like what you see, this package that God made so nicely.

I hope this helps. Hang in there -- believe me, I have been there, sister!! :)

Answer 2

You need to be secure with yourself and love yourself before you can really be 100% in a relationship. Everyone wishes that they were different in some way, but he would have not stuck around for a year if he didnt like you for you.

Answer 3

if you told him that, and if I were him, I would think you were the coolest thing ever. I mean, what an interesting question and thought process you have. I would bet that in general you are a very humble, selfless, and giving person to think like that. You have a very unique perspective and I hope he appreciates what he has. I am sure you love him plenty, so don't worry about it. Good luck to you.

Answer 4

i really don't understand you but why would you like to be other girls? all you need to worry about is the love you guys have for each other and like you say that your fine then he loves you but this is so complicated....