She mostly just lies down, kisses me, and lets me do all the work. I would like to switch roles every once and awhile but she simply goes too limp to do anything. While I always try things to make her happy I would like her to return the favor and be more active. I don't care for freakyness but just want to be able to for the bot of us to experiance more with eachother.
2007-01-30 15:21:54 · 14 answers · asked by rezruf 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Talk, talk, talk.... but not on THE moment. Wait for a good moment and strike a conversation about how great it could be if she started being a bit more active... show some bright eyes as you speak, in order to spike her interest.... g'luck!!
2007-01-30 15:29:32 · answer #1 · answered by disintegrationisthebestalbumever 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Is she self concious about her appearance or her body? A lot of women don't feel comfortable in their own skin, which puts a burden on their sex drives. Make sure she knows she is beautiful and be sure to compliment her figure.
Does she normally reach climax during sex? If not, maybe she is discouraged and is under the impression that you're supposed to do all the work. If she doesn't seem to be getting much from the experience, maybe she isn't reaching orgasm. Suggest that she get on top, not only does it feel good for the man, it also helps the woman reach orgasm faster because she is able to move around and find her G spot.
Talk to her but don't be critical. Don't say things like "I wish you'd do more than just lay there" etc.
Tell her you'd like to try some new sex positions, that way she doesn't feel like she's the one who needs to learn something new, rather you can both try something different.
Also, don't always have sex in bed and don't use the same position(s) all the time.
BORING!
Spice things up a bit.
Good luck.
2007-01-30 23:38:11 · answer #2 · answered by Desiree 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Uh, probably you need to figure out how to get her off first. How about you _ask_ her what she likes.
Maybe she's bored with you. Write down some fantasies. Make her feel beautiful. Maybe she'd like to prance around in lingerie once in a while. Watch some porn together - enjoy it and don't expect anything. Expectation ruins desire. Get away from the bed. Bed-sex is boring sex. Move to the shower or kitchen or floor or outside or park bathroom or anywhere that isn't so ... boring.
P.S. Do something dirty. It probably feels like work to her. Don't think about it so much. Be spontaneous.
2007-01-30 23:31:54 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When me and my ex first started dating, he did all the work. Mostly because I wasn't very experienced and didn't know what the hell I was doing. Maybe that's how she feels?
In the end of the relationship he would only do it one way and that was with me doing all the work. (I didn't get any pleasure out of it, ever).
Somewhere in the middle of the relationship we liked to switch positions alot. That way we each took turns being the one in action. He would sometimes ask me to try a new position or vice versa. In the end, I'd say I was a pro with him. I knew everything he liked.
So I'd say, just ask her. He was able to ask me and I was very shy about being on top. I knew nothing about being on top. I was horrible. lol Practice made perfect. Sometimes my guy would nudge me too, just to let me know what he wanted. He would tug at my panties to get those off. Then he would put my hand where he wanted it. Then he'd pull me where he wanted me to go. Eventually, I was pretty adventurous and didn't need a guide.
2007-01-30 23:34:42 · answer #4 · answered by Tiffany 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to have a mature and constructive conversation with her about it--outside of the bedroom. Don't criticize her or put her down. Just express how you feel and ask for her input and perspective on your sex life. She may not feel comfortable being "active" or may be inexperienced and does not know what she can do. Many women are self-conscious about their bodies and performance, so be sensitive and encouraging--but not pushy.
2007-01-30 23:29:29 · answer #5 · answered by KatEyez4 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have you told her how you feel about it? Make sure you tell her how sexy and attractive you think she is. I would say talk to her about it, but don't sound accusatory. Maybe she is just shy and needs time to get comforable (if it is a relatively new relationship) I know it took a looongg time for me to be more bold sexually, for that reason.
2007-01-30 23:30:16 · answer #6 · answered by learning_to_live_616 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
people on here are mean right? anyways, tell her to loosen up..maybe massage her back with oils for 10 minutes before you guys start next time that would definantly help with that part...go down on her too get her "flowing"
2007-01-30 23:32:11 · answer #7 · answered by pokeralchemist 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have you tried asking her? something as simple as a guy telling me " I really like it if you would..." would give me more initiative to do it, or you could try a sex game to get her more involved
2007-01-30 23:31:43 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
talk to her.. ask her what she likes. when your having sex you have to be aggressive with her.. when you do that you'll get a reaction. maybe she's bored with the sex, maybe its too routine. next time when you and her have sex try something different instead of doing it missionary all the time.
2007-01-30 23:28:21 · answer #9 · answered by Blake 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Grow a couple or three inches and see how it works. And I don't mean in height.
2007-01-30 23:27:52 · answer #10 · answered by hillbilly 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋