I am 13, and I personally DO think it is too young. I mean, we're only in 7th grade. I asked my parents what to do if a boy asks me out, and they said they would talk about it when that moment comes. I think it's stupid how kids my age, 13 and 12, take these "relationships" so seriously. They're only 13, and have got plenty of time to date. And when that plenty of time comes, maybe the person they date will really care about them. What's your oppinion?
2007-01-30 15:01:36 · 24 answers · asked by Addicted To Abercrombie & Fitch 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Imagine that you started dating in the fifth grade and you had several relationships where you became very close to your girlfriends but then broke up. You gave part of yourself emotionally or physically to these random people. Later, when you meet the person you marry, you regret having kissed all those people and shared all those secrets. Although it did not seem like a big deal then, it sure adds up.
There's wisdom in taking your time before beginning a committed relationship. For example, only nine percent of people who started dating at the age of twelve will still be virgins when they graduate high school, whereas eighty percent of those who started dating at age sixteen will be virgins when they get their diploma.(1) This does not mean that if you started dating early, you will inevitably be sexually active in high school. I started dating in the fifth grade, which I now realize was pointless, and I got married last summer as a virgin at the age of 27.
Taking your time will not only safeguard your purity, it will also give you a better foundation for future relationships. For example, some people spend their entire high school years running around trying to find a date, frantic because everyone else seems to have one. Others always need to be dating someone new. As soon as one relationship ends, they jump into another because they feel incomplete without a date. They practically develop ulcers searching for their worth and their identity in relationships. Still others spend all four years staring into the eyes of a boyfriend or girlfriend. Their relationship consumes them, and by the time high school is over they are not sure of who they are or what their dreams are. The high school years are not meant for intense relationships that leave you feeling as if you would die without the other. This is a time to find out who you are, discover the world, and set the course for your life.
Nonetheless, it is not necessarily wrong to have a girlfriend in high school. But I can count on one finger the number of couples I know from high school that went on to get married. It seems like everyone thinks their love will last, but then college comes, the long-distance relationship begins, the couple continues to mature and meet tons of new people, and it almost always putters out. So, I personally don't see any point of seriously committing to a person when you know that marriage is still several years away.
Everyone wants the love of another person, but there is a season for everything. Right now, draw near to God so that you understand your worth in his eyes. Many people leap into relationships where their self-worth depends upon how the other treats them. Knowing what God thinks of you decreases your chances of falling into this trap.
So come to him, listen to his voice, and do whatever he tells you. As one woman said, "Inviting God to write the chapters of our love story involves work on our part--not just a scattered prayer here and there, not merely a feeble attempt to find some insight by flopping open the Bible every now and then. It is seeking him on a daily basis, putting him in first place at all times, discovering his heart."(2) He is the best guide when it comes to relationships, so stay close to him.
Lastly, your question presupposes that dating is the only option. It is not. Currently, there is a resurgence of young people leaving behind the modern concept of dating in favor of courtship.
If you're in high school and not in a relationship, do not worry that love will elude you if you don't rush into romance now. Take this time to be free from distractions, and ask yourself what God wants of you during these years. With all of your vigor and life, unreservedly give your youth to him. Try to outdo him in generosity, and watch what happens.
2007-01-30 15:06:18 · answer #1 · answered by kakolikapiha 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
13 is the age most people start thinking about dating, but not seriously. Most relationships that start in the early teens won't last, so most just date for experience. But by no means does that mean that everyone should start dating at 13. If it were up to me, people would start dating at around 16 - the age where you're young enough to have a laugh with it, but old enough to take it seriously.
2016-03-28 21:45:47 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey girl. I agree with you. 13 is defenetly too young to start dating. I am in college and from experience I can tell you that you are probably better off waiting until you've grown enough to see which guys are really into you and which ones are simply infatuated with you or just want to mess with you. I don't want you to be insulted and think that I am saying you're not smart enough to know which guys are real and which aren't. But I konw that at your age, just like you, I had a really good head on my shoulders...but since I was only 13 my brain wasn't developed enough to make the decisions that were in my best interest when it came to relationships with boys. Learn from your friends' relationships for now. Let them screw up...you'll be better off in the long run. It sucks to have your heart completely broken at a young age...it ruins your self esteem which affects everything else in your life.
And if you have any questions about this...eve...jsut send me a message.
Take care
xoxo
2007-01-30 15:30:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
First of all I think it's very mature of you to ask this and I commend you for it. Stick with your morals there girl. Yes it is too young. I've seen too many of my younger friends get hurt and badly from young relationships and things like that at that age. Some even are sexually active and that can hurt severely after they break up. Because doing the deed so to speak you actualy give a part of your heart and self away to the other person and it's tough to get it back and heal the pain after a break up. Wait till your older and more mature and ready for all that. I agree dating before you're 16 or 17 for girls and maybe guys is too young and dramatic.
2007-01-30 15:11:33 · answer #4 · answered by dave_83501 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I agree very much with you. But I know how you feel! You feel like your being pushed into dating and getting all serious with a guy. I thought the same way when I was 13 and I just want to hang with my girlfriends, But all they wanted to do was hang with "the love of their lives". I didn't have my 1st REAL boyfriend until I was 16. But I think its totally cool to have just a cute boyfriend (nothing serious) at your age!
2007-01-30 15:11:03 · answer #5 · answered by Tracey Lee ♥ 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I personaly dont think that is to young,my brother is your age and about every two months he has a new girlfriend.Im 15 and all I can say is that when you go out with a person it is an awsome feeling to know that someone other than a family member loves you and wants to do anything they can do to make you happy.
2007-01-30 15:13:55 · answer #6 · answered by 2jackweedm 1 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Yeah 13 is way too young to start having a boyfriend. U're not ready for that kind of commitment and years from now, I bet u're gonna be like did I really date that dude!!! What was I thinkin. U have so many years ahead of u. Be patient. The patient dog eats the fattest bone.
2007-01-30 17:29:46 · answer #7 · answered by powoyemi 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Come on everyone in here knows through school we had boyfriends from elementary school on up throuh high school.13 is not too young to date to a certain extent.I think parental advisement should be a requirement,or I could understand your parents taking kids to the movies.It really depends on the dating circumstances.
2007-01-30 15:07:54 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
I went on Saturday matinee movie dates, when I was 10 in 5th grade! Hand holding, but no kissing. Hugging! LOL. It was half a century ago.
2014-10-28 18:36:13 · answer #9 · answered by M. 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes. Really, it is the best to actually get to know yourself and whatnot before getting mixed up in dating. That way you will be less likly to settle for something less then what you truly deserve. You sound like a well adjusted kid, though, so good luck. :)
2007-01-30 15:09:23 · answer #10 · answered by Toga 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋