Thiz girl and I have been goin together for the past 6 months, and i REALLY care for her! We have ran into a HUGE problem, and that obsticle iz that she iz either moving to a different state (i live in ohio and she iz moving to kentucky) or she iz goin to join the air force... basicly either way im being left behind. I Feel as if i love and care for her much more than she cares for me. She wont marry me bcuz she doesnt feel she iz ready, but i strongly feel she could be "the one". She says she wants to take a break and see how that goes (jes being friends). I am really confused about the situation and needs answers! please give honest, explanitory answers please. Thanx.
2007-01-30 14:47:30 · 20 answers · asked by Mr.XXX 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you cant force her to be with you..it sounds like she has made up her mind..and you have to respect that..if its meant to be then it will happen later on down the road.
2007-01-30 14:53:39 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I left my boyfriend behind when I joined the Air Force......and don't regret it. We were too young and in college. You really don't know life.........I mean LIFE until you break out of your parents' house. Let her free, she isn't ready. Holding on to her will only make both of you unhappy. On one side, she might even end up blaming you for stopping her in the achievement of her dreams. She will get trained, GI Bill (for college), free education while she is in the military, and she will be well traveled. The Air Force has been fun and it will shape her into a better person. Time to move on into your own dreams! Never allow another person step in the way of your dreams. Love and everything might sound very romantic (and this is coming from a girl) but......at the end of the day, life goes on. I cared a lot about that boyfriend I had, but he didn't care enough for me because he didn't want me to leave. He wanted to keep me. Love doesn't hold back anybody; it promotes independence. Just like the saying "if it was ever yours....." You know the rest. What are YOUR goals? Education? I bet you are still young. Just take the time to think about your future. Your girlfriend sounds like a very smart girl; it's your turn to make decisions.
2007-01-30 14:56:05 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Usually when the person is apart from you you tend to realise how much the person really means to you and what you really want. I guess both of you's have to work at this as it will end up being a long distance relationship or maybe there might not be one at all!! It will all work out in the end once you both know exactly what you want and if she is the one then she will come back sooner then you think!!
2007-01-30 14:53:59 · answer #3 · answered by pqr 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seems like there is nothing you can do right now but let her go. She's moving...let's say you make a huge sacrafice and follow her, she's still going into the airforce...so let's say you go commando and join, too...she STILL doens't feel ready.
Relationships take two people in the same mindframe to move forward.
Keep a place for her in your heart, dude. Just cause that's where it is NOW doesn't mean fate doesnt have plans for you down the road...
2007-01-30 14:52:20 · answer #4 · answered by the_akbash 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
6 months, that's it? time to grow up and experience life, she is pro-active in taking her life to the next step, don't drag her down, if you care for her let her follow her ambitions and dreams. We all go through stages in life, it's the best part of being young, get over it and move on with your life, there are so much more outside your towns borders, let the adventures begin
Also, you may feel she is "the one" but obviously she doesn't, best relationships are the ones when two people are emotionally involved
2007-01-30 14:57:43 · answer #5 · answered by mohvictor 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have a calm non emotional, honest discussion. She knows how you feel about her and you need to know her true feelings for you. Find out is she is trully not ready for a relationship or if she just does not feel the same way about you. If she is just not ready, love is worth waiting for. You don't want her resenting you for the rest of her life for stopping her from following her dreams. If she's truly not interested it's better to find out sooner rather than later.
2007-01-30 14:57:36 · answer #6 · answered by Wijssegger 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is there to be confused about pal? She's not going to say yes to marriage. Haven't you ever heard the saying that absence makes the heart grow fonder?
You want somebody that wants you. If she's not interested at this point, even if you ropa-dope her into marriage, plan on a divorce cause it won't work.
There's lots of fish in the sea. Your heart will hurt, you'll cry. Get over it.
2007-01-30 14:52:39 · answer #7 · answered by P W 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Honestly I dont think you should hold her back from what she wants to do. If she is telling you she just wants to be friends its cause she probably has no intention of coming back ohio. I know its going to hurt cause you feel like she is the one but if a girl tells a guy she doesnt want to marry him. Then she really doesnt want to be with him. I dont know a girl in my life that would turn down a guy that they are in love with. but I do know girls that would turn a guy down because she doesnt see herself with that guy. I would try to move on its going to be hard but get ahold of all those friends you might have put on hold to be with her and spend your time having fun.
2007-01-30 14:57:40 · answer #8 · answered by H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think if she needs space, the best thing you can do is give it to her. If she has doubts, you will just drive her further away by pushing marriage. "The one" has to be a mutual thing, unfortunately. Imagine if some other girl thought you were the one, but you weren't sure you agreed. You would want time to think it over, right?
2007-01-30 14:52:53 · answer #9 · answered by sarcastro1976 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, my friend, but as that popular line goes "She's just not all that into you." Go with your feelings, they are correct. It does appear that you care more for her than she does for you.
At least right now.
Yes, it's hard, but tell her you understand, then get on with your life, start dating again right away.
Time will tell the rest of the story.
2007-01-30 14:54:24 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take a break, get a new girl and see how she reacts....then remind her that she wanted a break.
If she felt the same way as you do, do you think she would move away??
2007-01-30 14:51:23 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋