My friend Ashley and I both got engaged around the same time and her and i decided to go to look at dress together and she picked out a dress that wasnt that nice but she loved it so i just supported her, well she brought the dress home and her fiance happened to see it and i was at their house with my fiance while my Ashley was at work and her fiance saw the dress and went "what the hell is this!!??" and i didnt say anything, he looked like he was going to be sick and he went in the kitchen and got scissors and STARTED CUTTING THE DRESS!! i couldnt believe it but i didnt say anything, well my friend got home and her dress was all cut up. she started crying and her fiance said "you arent wearing that thing to our wedding, its ugly". i felt so bad....i dont know what to do or tell her what to do. i'm at a loss for words. anyone have any advice on what she should do, cuz i told her that she shouldnt marry someone like that..but i dont know....help!
2007-01-30 14:42:29 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
He is abusive and controlling she should break the engagement and get some therapy to understand why she was with him
2007-01-30 14:47:24 · answer #1 · answered by Nora 7 · 5⤊ 0⤋
I agree, he's abusive. Also, the dress-cutting seems like a veiled threat of physical violence. Although you can't control your friend's choices, you must be worried about seeing her hurt or worse.
Parents don't have much say in who their kids marry these days. It's up to "the girlfriends" to speak their minds. Again, your friend may be suffering from low self-esteem, and she might not take your advice. Still, it's important to communicate your honest feelings about this guy. You'll feel awful if you don't just to avoid rocking the boat, and something bad happens.
2007-01-30 15:01:13 · answer #2 · answered by mrrmaid 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he did that I believe there is other stuff going on that you DONT know about. I would sit her down and have a good heart to heart talk with her about things. Ask her about it and has he ever done anything else wrong like that.
The reason why I say other things are going on is that my ex cut up an outfit of mine too. It was an abusive relationship. Verbally and mentally. It was also down the road to physical.
Good luck!
2007-01-30 14:50:46 · answer #3 · answered by moo shell 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That guy is serious trouble!! At the least, he is emotionally abusing her and the worst he is controlling and possibly even physically abusing her. His abuse may be so pervasive that he has her believing she actually deserves that kind of treatment. You need to try to talk to your friend and ask her why someone who claims to love her would do something so hurtful to her. People in healthy relationships receive support and unconditional love from each other and are strengthened by each other. She needs to get out from under his domination and then seek counseling. I recommend you put her in touch with an abuse hotline so someone besides you is telling her these things. You are good friend and she's going to need you.
2007-01-30 15:35:29 · answer #4 · answered by Yo' Mama 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My fiance went with me to assist p.c.. out the gown and the bridemaids dresses too. He had some super suggestions. The gown I picked on the shop substitute into the incorrect colour and extensive on me. So he in basic terms form of observed it i assume. issues have substitute alot. the marriage is with regard to the couple besides, in the event that they're mushy approximately it then it incredibly is o.k.. all of it approximately what you prefer and the form you prefer it. The bride could have the human beings there that they desire there.
2016-10-16 08:32:19 · answer #5 · answered by Erika 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she should take it as a sign...he's not worthy of her. If he cuts up her wedding dress...than he probably treats her badly...she's better off without him. Tell her to get out now!! THe least he could have said was I don;t like it...take it back. He should pay for the next one if she decides to marry him. What a jerK!!!
2007-01-31 12:07:43 · answer #6 · answered by k_reile 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say dump the ***. I am a 49 year old mother of 3. If that guy did that to my daughters dress, i would give him a smacking he would never forget. Why is it that these girls think that a controlling guy is just showing love. These guys do not know love.
2007-01-30 14:52:58 · answer #7 · answered by abbyrose 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
She should dump his sorry a** and be done with him. What a jerk! He has no right to do that. She will be way better off without him. I'm curious, I wonder if he's always been this abusive to her. I hope she dumps him and soon. She deserves way better.
2007-01-30 16:51:56 · answer #8 · answered by Wishing on a Dream 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh my gosh.. if this is a window to their life together i hope your friend gets out now.. what would have happened at the wedding if he didnt see the dress prior?? he has no respect for her feelings or choices! im gob smacked
2007-01-30 15:57:02 · answer #9 · answered by AngD 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you KIDDING ME?! That's crazy. He didnt even discuss it with her, just cuts it up... red flag. She should call it off, cause with someone that angry/impulsive/unstable... next time he might attack HER with the scissors.
2007-01-30 16:39:19 · answer #10 · answered by Kimia 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋