What to do about an unclear relationship?

Question

This guy and I have been friends for about 1 1/2. When I met him I was dating someone. He and I became very close. He always said that if I was single he would date me. Well now I am single. I spend ALOT of time with him and his little boy, I've slept with him several times(when he didn't have his son for a night) and he kisses me goodnight/ holds my hand etc even when his boy is there. Yet when he introdues me I am just a friend and he sometimes talkes like I am his best friend whom he just sleeps with!! It's driving me crazy! I can't tell what he wants. I love him to death and want to be with him. But I don't want to push him to define anything, he may just be giving me time to be single after my last relationship. Also he works with my ex, could that be a reason he is hesitant to call me his GF? What should I do? I don't want to push things, I just want to know where I stand.

Answer 1

I have always said honesty is the best policy. Talk to him about it. Say to him that you want to know what is going on in his head about where things are at with both of you. Let him know though that you dont want to push things but are curious because even though you sleep together he still calls you "friend". If he is a true "friend" he will explain things to you.

Answer 2

Be careful about not being upfront with what you want because he could be using you. Hold off on sleeping with him until you find out what his true intentions are. If he can't commit to you, why should you give yourself to him in hopes that he will? Maybe he is scared of another relationship. How did things end with the mother of his little boy? Don't put too much pressure on him but ask him how he feels about dating you. How long has it been since your last relationship? Regardless of whether or not you are fully over your ex, you do need some time to adjust to being single before you can jump into a new relationship with someone else. The only way to tell what he wants is to ask, otherwise you'll continue wondering and continue being the "friend" he sleeps with. Good luck.