Is being a single parent wrong?

Question

im just wondering what you all think. is it wrong to be a single parent. what i mean is, is it bad for the child? not having a father figure present?

im over 20 years old. just wanted to make it clear that im not a teen

Answer 1

Personally I would say 'no', but considering I am thinking of being a single parent myself, I would say that is bias.

The stereotypical "father figure" that people say a child needs is usually seen as the person who brings home the funds needed to support the family, the one whose word is law, who protects and guides when needed. Yay, 50's parenting.

Children FIND ways to fill these roles, reguardless of weither or not a second adult is in the house. The mother may take on most of the roles, but close friends of the mother (people who get labled "aunt" or "uncle"), teachers, grandparents, parents of friends might become advisors or guides when a second opinion is needed.

Some think this is wrong, that the child should not have to go so far from the "saftey of home" to fill these roles, but children do it anyway. How many times, when we were growing up, did we tell out parents they were wrong because a teacher or friend's parent said so. Also, some "fathers" don't know how to react with their kids, especially if it is a daughter, and so a child WITH a father will seek out "fatherly" advice from other responcible male OR female adults they have in their lives.

What is wrong is for a person to force themselves into a relationship for the purpose of having a child. If you don't want a partner but you do want a child, don't force yourself to fall in love to reach your goal. But don't cloister yourself from any aid offered by friends or family. Everyone needs help sometimes, it is not a sin. Just do your best, that is all anyone can ever do.

~~ Abaddon

Answer 2

I grew (and am growing) up in a single parent household. I am just as good academically, mentally, physically, and emotionally as any other 17 year old girl. Nothing is different. I am perfectly healthy and have had male role models throughout my life. I do not feel deprived because I do not have a father. I have gotten jealous of people with 2 parents, but doesn't everyone get jealous of something at some point? I feel (in my situation) it was best for me (my father was abusive to my mother, even during pregnancy). My mom has done a darn good job of raising me. Actually, better than some who have help from a spouse. I am close with my mom, closer than some of my friends with either of their parents. But my mom is my mom when she has to be. I think I would rather have 1 parent than 2.

Answer 3

I don't thinks it's bad but if the father isnt around that is bad, my mother was a single parent, but i always saw my dad so i would at least know him when i got older. being a single parent is not always bad. i think it makes the single parent strong in many ways. It's like being a mother and a father to your child. it's mostly good with some negatives.

Answer 4

First off, an abusive mother or father is never good for a child. Second, there are many examples of successful adults from single parent households. That said, compared to children from two parent homes, children from fatherless homes account for:

* 85% of all children that exhibit behavioral disorders come from fatherless homes (Source: Center for Disease Control)
* 90% of all homeless and runaway children are from fatherless homes (Source: U.S. D.H.H.S., Bureau of the Census)
* 71% of all high school dropouts come from fatherless homes (Source: National Principals Association Report on the State of High Schools.)
* 63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes (Source: U.S. D.H.H.S., Bureau of the Census)

If those figures don't say anything to you, then what will? Being a single parent isn't wrong. But if you truly want the best for your child, why would you purposely put it at a disadvantage in this crazy world?

Answer 5

I think the best case scenario of for a child to have a mother and a father who love them very much and when getting pregnant you should do what you can to make sure this happens. Unfortunately this doesn't always happen and I know a lot of great single parents who have raised wonderful children.

Answer 6

I grew up in a very loving household where my mother and a father were high school sweet hearts and still to this day are very much in love and my role models as who I want to be. In as few words as possible, I got knocked up (there's a lot more to the story, that I don't need to bore you with). My son is 2 now and I worry all the time about having the best family environment for him. His father is in his life, but really only as a play mate that he stays the night with once a week. They do fun stuff like play and watch cartoons together and eat ice cream. I always make sure that I never let him see me upset with his father or make derogatory comments about him, no matter how much I want to. I want him to make his own decisions. But my son does have my father in his life, and though I make sure he knows that is not his dad, he does know that he is his papa and that papa will discipline if needed. Papa is so excited about playing baseball and basketball and taking him fishing and stuff. I think that being a single mom is the best gift God ever gave me. He gave me this role in my son's life to help him grow in to the man that God wants him to be.

Answer 7

No, it is not wrong. I grew up as a fatherless child. Yes, I missed out on a number of key experiences but you know what? Nowadays a lot more kids than in my day are raised by single parents.

I bet it is hard being the parent though...

I always think how lucky I am to have my husband to help out!

(edited to add- I have a step dad now and he is FANTASTIC. He is perfect and he is every bit as good as a real dad whom I do know and see regularly but do not feel close to)

Answer 8

I don't think it is necessarily wrong, but life is tough in so many ways even with everything in place. I wouldn't advise anyone to bring a child into this world without at least starting off with both parents. If you don't see getting married but want children, try taking care of some foster children. Or you might want to consider adoption of a child that would be better off with one parent than without any.

Answer 9

no it's not wrong. and it's not bad for the child. as long as she/he is in a stable environment.

i'm a single mother. my daughter is 18 months old. she has her grandparents which are my parents and i'm home with her almost 24/7. i don't think she lacks anything from it either. she's very outgoing and loves to say hi to strangers. you would never know that she didn't have a father. she's learning just as fast as other kids.

Answer 10

it hard for a child to grow up with out a father figure but you can be a single parent just get some one to fill the father figure role maybe a grandfather or a uncle good luck?