For some background, I'm getting married at 3pm in a chruch, and starting the evening around 4:30pm with cocktails at the resort where the reception will be held. Do I need to serve food at the cocktail hour? We are having a big sit down dinner at 6:30 or so, and I'm sure people will eat lunch before coming to the wedding at 3pm. We are also having the late snack around 11:30pm or so. Another question, we plan on putting two bottles of wine on each table, then whatever else they want, there is a cash bar. Is it necessary to have a champagne toast? I can't bring my own, the resort does not allow outside food/drinks in. They provide champagne at a cost of $60 a bottle, and I'll need quite a few bottles obviously for everyone to have 1 glass. Is it really a necessity? People can just toast wtih their wine, no?
2007-01-30 10:54:06 · 16 answers · asked by Kass 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
by the way, I will not be made to feel bad about the cash bar, too bad people! ;) I'm buying some of the alcohol, but in no way am I spending all that money for people to take advantage. No thanks! :P So to all of you who think it's rude, I guess I'm glad you won't be attending? lol
2007-01-31 11:36:31 · update #1
I own a country club and handle all of the wedding planning. I would advise serving some type of light appetizer during the cocktail hour for one reason only....you don't want your guests drinking on an empty stomach. Serving food with alcohol helps in slowing the absorption of alcohol into the body.
You certainly may toast with wine. I have seen it done many times. Although a previous response from "etiquette girl" states that cash bars are ta bu, this is absolutely NOT the case.
Many more people are opting for cash bars due to concern over liquor liability in the event that someone is injured after leaving the property. Although my club makes quite a bit of money from an open bar, I really try to steer my brides in the direction of having a limited open bar or a cash bar for liability reasons as well.
2007-01-30 12:27:42 · answer #1 · answered by 14b32bbdog 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Definitely have something like crudite and veggies and/or cheese and crackers at least because people will be hungary by that time. As for the toast, if you're already putting wine on the tables then that will be fine to toast with. I've been to sooo many weddings where the champagne is wasted. Your guests will most likely have a drink of their own by that time too that they can use. Congrats and good luck!
2007-01-30 11:09:20 · answer #2 · answered by sunflower 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't have a cash bar it's tacky; just serve beer and wine. Also I always say that a champagne toast is total waste of money. Invariably I'm the only person at the table who actually drinks the sparkling wine on the table. Another problem with the champagne toast is the wine is usually warm and flat by the time you actually get around to the toast. Sparkling wine is my favorite drink and I hate to see it abused like that. It is totally acceptable to toast with wine or beer or whatever.
2007-01-30 13:03:46 · answer #3 · answered by maigen_obx 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
No, you do not need to serve "food" during the cocktail hour, but if it makes you feel better to offer something along with the cocktails, try something inexpensive such as pretzels, popcorn, etc. Two bottles of wine on each table is plenty to hold the toast. You do not need to buy any extra. The important thing about the toast is what is said, not what is in the glass!
2007-01-30 11:14:07 · answer #4 · answered by davidswoman 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It seems you are well organized.
There's no need to serve food at the cocktail hour. It's too near the time of the sit-down dinner.
It's not necessary to have a champagne toast; wine (or any drink, not even alcohol) is perfectly acceptable for this.
Hope you have a wonderful wedding and much happiness in your future life together.
2007-01-30 11:02:34 · answer #5 · answered by Alex 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
have a cheese tray at coctail hour. Peaple usually dont' have time to get soemthig to eat before a wedding. Anyway, you know what happens when you drink on an empty tummy.
It should be reasonable as far as cost goes.
As far as the wine/toast-2 bottles is fine for wine and if you want to have a champ. toast, they should only be filling the glasses "two fingers" high..just about an inch. shouldn't be a whole lot of bottles of champ.
Hope it helps
2007-01-30 11:40:25 · answer #6 · answered by the agent 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i have a few comments. miss manners is DATED! it is no longer wrong to have a cash bar, dont feel bad. like the previous people posted, its all about liability. i do have a suggestion for a compromise though. why not try the 1st hour or 2 (especially when you have little to no food being served) as a cash bar, and then open the bar (free of charge) for an hour or two after that. for a cheaper alternative, why not just have an "open" beer/wine bar after the cash bar? then close it around an hour before the end in the hopes that people dont imbibe too much before driving.
also, i was going to do the wine on tables at my wedding in march, but have been told adamantly not to for a couple reasons. for one, this winds up with a LOT of wasted wine, people will open bottles they dont finish. etc. also thats asking for messy stains an spills. worse still, what about the case of someone who loves wine sitting w/ non wine drinkers? he/she could potentially have 2 bottles of wine in one sitting! why not just have X amount of bottles and have the servers walking around refilling as needed.
2007-01-30 21:57:41 · answer #7 · answered by crazydaisyodu 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The food at cocktail hour is not a necessity, but providing a beverage for the toast is....and you have provided with the wine.....I think that a card at the table to let people know what the wine is for would suffice. Maybe something like this:
When it is time to toast...please enjoy this wine!
2007-01-30 11:00:10 · answer #8 · answered by chattykatty 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes, I would be sure to serve food when serving alcohol, or people are going to get quite tipsy indeed. But it can be simple like cheese and crackers (assembled hors d'oevures are more pricey).
A cash bar of ANY kind is absolutely INAPPROPRIATE at a private event such as a wedding. Guests do not pay anything being offered or served at your reception. Not parking, not coat check, not any food or drink being offered them, not tips or gratuities of any kind (there should be no "tip jars" anywhere in sight). ALL these items are the financial responsibility of the host(s). If the hosts are not paying for something, it should not be served or offered at your reception. Case closed.
Yes, people can toast with their wine (in their regular wine glasses)-- champagne or champagne glasses are not required, if that is what you choose. however, if you want something bubbly, festive, and inexpensive to put in champagne glasses, you might try serving sparking apple juice.
However, you may want to check on the legalities of leaving bottle of wine on the tables. Some locales have laws against peopel serving themselves alcohol, and you will have to have waiters serving the wine at table (or the wine wil have to be served at the bar).
Someone mentioned above that you can serve champagne at the head table without serving it to everyone. Do NOT do this-- it would be extremely RUDE to consume something in front of your guests that you are not offering to all, or to consume something of better quality at head table that you are not offering to all the guests.
2007-01-30 11:12:07 · answer #9 · answered by Etiquette Gal 5 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Sure you can toast with wine........I dont see a problem with that.
Especially, if YOU are providing the wine.
I would suggest some appetizers at the reception. People will each lunch around 1ish......the reception starts at 4:30 and
dinner isn't til 6:30??? People will be wanting something to snack on.........just get the cheapest appetizers on the menu.
It doesn't have to be anything extravagant.
Good luck & Congratulations
2007-01-30 10:59:36 · answer #10 · answered by Trish 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋