I'm looking for your opinions guys and girls. What do you think? If someone decides that romance/love is something too stressful or painful for them, or is simply "not their thing", is there anything wrong with not wanting to ever be in love or marry and to want only to enjoy and live out their life as a single person?
2007-01-30 09:27:52 · 34 answers · asked by deeperthinkker 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It would be pretty ridiculous, wouldn't it? ... To call it "wrong" to just simply NOT want a certain way of life. I mean, you feel what you feel. If a person w ere forced against his will to get married, how fair would that be to the unfortunate person whom he (or she) was forced to marry.
But, having said that... . falling in love isn't exactly something a person decides to do, or not do. I was having a perfectly good life, and I sure wasn't looking for a husband when I met the man whom I did marry. There I was walking along a certain street at a certain time of day in a certain country, and he was walking the other way along the same street. LOL three months later we were married, and we've lived happily ever after.
No, it absolutely is NOT "wrong". It's your life, and your decision and in fact it is the right thing to do, to be honest with yourself about your own feelings, and honest with everybody else. And there's no law against changing your mind at any time if, like me, you just run into the person that makes you feel differently about it.
The only thing I would mention is that there really does come a time in life where it feels reeeeeally good to have that other person sitting there with you in the evenings, somebody who has known you for a long time, and knows all about you and you've got a lot of shared memories together. It's not so much when you are young, and fit and healthy, but time has a way of slipping up on you, and you're not as 100 per cent as you used to be. It's a pretty comforting thing to have that "other person" there to pick up your slack when you feel off color, or that little touch of arthritis acts up and you need your partner to do something that you usually do. You'd be surprised how many things come up sooner or later that you never had a problem doing for yourself, but suddenly you need your partner to help you do.
I wouldn't say that was a REASON to get married - you know, if you just flat-out don't like the idea, it would be wrong to go into that kind of commitment. It just happens to be a great bonus if you do find that right one. There IS only one good reason to get married, and that is because you have met somebody you truly feel good about and really want to share the rest of your life with this person. But as for it being "right or wrong" LOL that would be ridiculous. We can't all march to the same drumbeat, and we have a right to make that kind of a choice based on the way we ourselves feel.
2007-01-30 10:11:25 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's fine in a way. Some peoples get with people hoping for some ideal that never happens. On the other hand:
Comes a rain storm put rubbers on your feet
Comes a snow storm you can get a little heat
Comes love nothing can be done
Comes a fire then you know just what to do
Blow a tire you can buy another shoe
Comes love nothing can be done
Don't try hiding cause there isn't any use
You'll start sliding when your heart turns on the juice
Comes a headache you can lose it in a day
Comes a toothache see your dentist right away
Comes love nothing can be done
Comes a heat wave you can hurry to the shore
Comes a summons you can hide behind the door
Comes love nothing can be done
Comes the measles you can quarantine the room
Comes a mouse you can chase him with a broom
Comes love nothing can be done
That's all brother if you've ever been in love
That's all sister you know what I'm thinking of
Comes a nightmare you can always stay awake
Comes depression you might get another break
Comes love nothing can be done
2007-01-30 09:57:23 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not at all! I am 38 years old and have never wanted to be married or have children. I don't believe in the media-promoted idea of love and romance and genuinely prefer to be alone most of the time.
If you don't want to be with another person romantically, that is your choice and it is a perfectly valid choice. Society has a terribly overblown illusion of what love is and is about, and it has created a lot of unnecessary pain, dysfunction, and even violence.
I really don't like relationships but I have a boyfriend that I've been with on and off for 8 1/2 years. We're best friends, can live together without much friction, and we love each other. There's no great passion, no "hearts and flowers" romance, it just works. If anything ever happened to permanently break us up, I have no interest in ever getting involved in another relationship.
Stick with your gut and your guns and make sure whatever you choose is what you really want. Take care! :-)
2007-01-30 09:40:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No I don't think it's wrong at all...you have plenty of time for that in the future [that's if you'll ever want it] I think though that should love come along you may find that it's not so easy to ignore....depends really on how determined you are to keep your mind closed to it.....I think quite honestly Sweetheart that you're making a good choice for you right now...you may get people telling you that you're being selfish but I don't think so....
Good luck to you Babe...wish I'd been stronger or more aware that I could actually control my feelings....even with a happy marriage which mine is there still comes a lot of sh*t sometimes...
I guess the only problem with keeping your mind closed to love is you have to keep it closed to lust as well because the feelings can so easily escalate...I could live my life without love but not without lust though.....
Enjoy your life & be happy. ♥
2007-01-30 09:38:37 · answer #4 · answered by Funky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My aunt never found the right man to marry and has enjoyed a single lifestyle...she's been able to travel, help her friends and family, and worked for NASA for many years. Of course there's nothing wrong with it...as long as this decision isn't being prompted by shyness or being jilted. You're not running away from life are you???
2007-01-30 09:34:28 · answer #5 · answered by imask8r 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is YOUR life and you should live it the way you want!! You only have one life to live so enjoy it. What is wrong for some people or right doesnt mean that it is for everyone.
As long as your honest and upfront and dont give someone the idea that your looking in "forever" then your not hurting anyone. good luck
2007-01-30 09:34:19 · answer #6 · answered by hopefloats 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well here is my opinion. I want to be in love but i don't. I've never had a boyfriend and all of my friends are in long relationships (6 months or more) and I'm the only single one. (of my girlfriends) I really want to find a boy and be in love and the whole thing but i dont want to be in love to. I mean i'm soo busy with sports and other stuff that i feel i would be cutting the boy short on the relationship and then i dont' want to get hurt if he loses feelings for me. Thats my worst fear. That i'm goin to get hurt. I don't want to be in love cause i'm scared he wont return the feelings.
Well in your case i think that its ok to not want to be in love. That you just want to be single. Its ok, you might just feel that way now and it could change or it might not. Its totally fine. Yes its goin to be hard cause some people aren't goin to understand but that happens.
2007-01-30 09:36:01 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Theres nothing wrong with that. It is your choice whether you would want to get involved with love. To me, being single is awesome because theres no one there to hold you back from doing things that you love. Being in love also is emotional and that you would breaking up and that love wouldn't exist anymore. Its just too painful to deal with.
2007-01-30 09:36:51 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothin wrong with that, but make sure the person your "having fun with" just wants to be single too. If their lookig for a relationship and your not, oh no... can you say "trouble?"
2007-01-30 09:31:34 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope, nothing wrong with that! I've been with my bf for 5 yrs, but I NEVER want to have babies! It's just not my thing.
BUT, we all need the love and support of another individual at times.
2007-01-30 09:33:47 · answer #10 · answered by PiZzA 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋