My mother has 6 children, 17 grandchildren, & 5 great-grandchildren. My brother, 1 sister and I are all married. Some of my nieces and nephews live with significant others, but are not married. In spite of her advanced age & limited finances, my mother gives her children, their spouses, children & grandchildren the same gift of $$ for Xmas & birthdays. Live-in significant others get a check for their birthdays, & as a couple they get 1 1/2 times the amount a single person would get for Christmas. She is very careful to make sure nobody feels slighted.
My in-laws gave me a pair of pierced earrings for Xmas, & I don't have pierced ears. Even if I did, they're not something anyone who knows me would choose for me, AND I could tell they were re-gifted. My birthday was on the 11th & I didn't even get a card. My husband's was yesterday--he got a card & a hefty check.
I feel like I don't matter to them. Would you feel slighted?
2007-01-30 07:39:28 · 16 answers · asked by Karen M 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You arent their child, so No, I wouldnt feel slighted. I happen to have amazing in laws, but my Dad has 9 kids and wouldnt even remember my husbands name if I didnt remind him enough. My dad gives money to COUPLES at xmas. I use to get 50 bucks for myself at xmas... Now he gives it to both of us... My husbands parents only have 2 kids, and 3 grand kids... So they kind of spoil us. I really appreciate it since my own mom has passed away. It feels nice to be a part of a family, and not just related by marriage.
2007-01-30 07:45:02 · answer #1 · answered by Angel Eve 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess I would be. But then again the best thing to do is just send a thank you and maybe hand them off to someone else. Or if you wanted to be so bold give them the gift back telling them that you regretfully have to return them as your ears are not pierced and you are not planning to do so any time soon. But that might cause friction. So be careful what you do.
2007-01-30 07:45:52 · answer #2 · answered by jaws1013 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you WERE slighted! As a mother and a mother-in-law, I always include my three daughter's partners. I also love them like they were my own. Where I come from, that is what family does. They need to wake up and realize that they have a new daughter!
2007-01-30 07:49:41 · answer #3 · answered by Bev 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'm a step grandchild, I even have had that ingredient of the kin for 20+ years. i substitute into 14 while my Dad have been given remarried and that i've got an extremely close relationship with all of my "step" mom's ingredient of the kin. My households motto has continually been there are in basic terms "steps" that bring about our living house not in our kin!! My toddler brother is my "step" brother yet I even have prevalent him for the reason that he substitute right into a three hundred and sixty 5 days previous. we are very close! it incredibly is going to be a huge deal if thats the way the kin is going to handle it!!
2016-10-16 07:39:36 · answer #4 · answered by season 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Many years ago I might have felt slighted however over the years I have learned to ignore it.
However last year I didnt buy cards for either one of them and as the day got closer I reminded my hubby that he needed to buy them. (he signed both of our names, however it was with his pen)This was the first year and nothing was said>>however it made me feel better...stupid maybe...however I know the time I put into each gift and the effort in choosing one....
best wishes.
2007-01-30 08:14:16 · answer #5 · answered by travelingirl005 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. Talk to them openly and ask them if they have any issues regarding you. If they are cowards, they will deny everything and then talk about it behind your back. If nothing is resolved - ignore them and let your husband have a relationship with them. If your hubby asks you why you can tell him the reason and that you had tried to resolve the problem but it still persists.
2007-01-30 07:47:59 · answer #6 · answered by Michael K 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think God everyday that he gave me the best in-laws in the world. I have always been treated as the daughter they never had. to your ? yes i would feel hurt but i would not show it and i would not fight with my husband about his parents lack of social manners
2007-01-30 07:50:08 · answer #7 · answered by MJ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i feel very sorry for u.... but one thing sure i have seen more or less almost all inlaws in some or the other way make their daughter in law feel that she is a alien in the house. well in crude way if i have to say its all politics... i had many painful
experinces but i moved on in life thinking there whole lot of other in my life like my husband,my kids,my parents, freinds, people around me who makes me feel very important. u will get more hurt if u strat keeping some expectation from ur inlaws just igonre them accept the fact move on in life.
2007-01-30 08:14:52 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You know what I truly know how you feel my mother law hates me and I've been married to my husband for 10 years I feel like no matter what i do i will no be god enough for her son. the best advice i can give you is what i did myself MOVE AWAY FROM THEM!!!!! it has done wonders for our marriage.
2007-01-30 07:47:06 · answer #9 · answered by dirt77 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The out-laws are always difficult. Try to take no notice. Mum-in-laws never forgive daughters-in-law from taking their son away from them. And having to share their son's affection.
2007-01-30 07:47:47 · answer #10 · answered by lou b 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋