what do you think about the 67 year old mother?

Question

personally, i think it's extremely selfish on her behalf: by the time her kids are eighteen, she'll be eighty five...you could say "well as long as she's a good mother, then it doesn't matter", but even if she's the best in the world, she's not gonna live for most of their lives, so it's practically guaranteeing they won't have a mother by the time they hit 20..i know she lied about her age, but how can a clinic let it happen? shouldn't there be a birth certificate or some sort of document involved? i think IVF is a great thing, but nature has its laws and maybe exceding them a bit is fine, but 67...that's just wrong (in my opinion). their mum is probably going to be older than most of their friends' grandmothers! what are your thoughts? also, anyone who can fight my argument to try and change my mind is very welcome.

orange, their parents may be older now, but were they when they had the children?
and r9, i also disagree with teenage mothers, but i think that if women's bodies are sexually mature at that age, at least it's natural. not saying i'm all for it, though.

lilmama, absolutely,whohad the energy at 60 to have kids? and actually, it's not her right, because there is a maximum age limit which she exceeds.

digory, i never said i don't have a problem with people murdering their children...of course i do!

pinkprincessners, your arguments are really good, but i'd just like to say (and i know i'm stubborn) that i'm not against against every agegroup having children. i said that teenage parents (and i don't consider eighteen too young at all) are within the natural age for having kids. what i meant was that sixteen isn't the ideal age to raise a child, because generally, people aren't emotionally or financially stable, but i do think it's totally within someone's right to have a baby at that age or even younger. i think nature defines it: so if a girl gets her period aged thirteen, her body says she's ready (not necessarily emotionally though), and if a woman goes through the menapours at 55, then that's it, too late.

Answer 1

I do love a good debate, so I do wish I could fight your arguement - but I can't! Nature has it's way of ensuring that we women bear children and bring them up whilst we're physically and emotionally capable or doing so (and even then it can be difficult!). The energy involved in nurturing a baby and bringing up a child is enormous and even young mothers can feel exhausted at times - just imagine what it's going to be like being the mother of a 3 year old at 70!! The mind boggles. Plus all the angst when a child grows to be a teenager; how on earth is an 80 year old going to cope with all the dramas, and even attempt to understand the emotions of a 13 year old? I rest my case. OMG, I've just re-read your question and realise that we're talking more than one, so TWINS!! That's really scary. So...... double-up on everything I've already said - it all sounds impossible; they'll grow-up, but the mother can't possibly fulfil the task of being their mother in every sense. Crazy!

Answer 2

So you have trouble with older mothers, teenage mothers... you think that the perfect child, and family will come if the mother is what age 29-34? Are you against single mothers?

Her body let her get pregnant, albeit with help. There are a lot of women in their 30s that need help too, due to scarring etc. Should they not be allowed to have kids? Where do you draw the lines? I'm going to assume you're also against single mothers as well. What about men that are in their 60s/70s who get much younger women pregnant. Is that wrong too? If a birth mother dies from a disease, etc do you also find it wrong for them to be raised by a grandparent? The grandparent could die before the child hits 21. Should that be against the moral law of our society?

A perfectly healthy women with 2.5 children who stays home with her kids and has the perfect husband who earns 100K a year and works 10 months out of the year could be mowed down tomorrow by a drunk driver. Really, age is not a factor anymore when it comes to raising children. I was 18 when I had my first daughter. I was a teenager theoretically. Should that have been outlawed by our society since I didn't fit the age rule? There are many 30 year old women who are married who have absolutely no right to be raising or having children. Drug testing for pregnant/new moms would make much more sense than the arguements you are trying to raise.

Goes back to the abortion topic, mandatory birth control topic, etc etc etc. Everyone's body really is their own. Age doesn't matter in a society where people live to be 114, and thousands are dying young from being smokers.

Answer 3

All I have to say is that I hope she has a will and has establish who will get the children if she were to pass away before they become adults, which may or may not be likely...people are living to 116 nowadays. I don't think it is a good idea to have children at 67 though: as a parent-you will miss weddings and grandchildren, etc. and as the child- they will not get to share those things. On top of all of the traditional things (what will be missed, the children will be without a mother & probably father at a young age & they will not have the energy to play and care for them), the children will have to care for their parents before they are even ready to take care of themselves,how can they take care of children if they don't have good retirement or if they get sick, and having children at an older age increases the children's chances of physical and mental problems. Fine, she did it but she better have everything in place for them or it is just irresponsible.

Answer 4

I am all for people wanting children and not having a partner and going for IVF if there body has changed to much or for whatever reason. But she is SELFISH all she will eventually do is break her childrens hearts because she knows she will die before they are emotionally stable. It must be hard for anyone who parents die especially when they are young i mean you dont know when you time is up but there is a bit of a limit and i think she is far exceeding that limit.

Answer 5

There are biological reasons as to why women don't, naturally, give birth to offspring as they get beyond a certain age. The purpose of the mother is not just to have babies, but to nurture and care for their offspring. The older you get, the less chance you have of doing this for a long period. It's less of a problem in the animal world, where young are born and then raised to adulthood much more quickly. In the human world we need parenting for at least 16-18 years, and by then we have, hopefully, built up a strong relationship with our parents which most would not want cut short. To have to deal with extreme old age, whilst still a teenager, is very demanding. In short I think its great for her, but not so for the children.

Answer 6

I see the troll with the hand has hit you too. Nice.

Anyways, as far as this woman is concerned, I think it is incredibly selfish too. She's not going to live for the years her kids need her the most.

And, is she going to physically be able to withstand all the demands that having a youngster makes on you? My step-mom is 60 and can't even PICK UP my almost 2 year old. How in the world is she going to make it to all the games and deal with boo-boos and all of that?

Will she take the demands out on the child? I know that my grandma would have had a coronary if she knew half the things I did as a kid, but what she did know about, she had the luxury of knowing that I had a mother to take care of it. This woman IS the mother...

Ugg. I think it's terrible.

Answer 7

I believe that if she got pregnant, then she was meant to have that baby. She may or may not live to see that child grow up, but we have no way of knowing that. People are living to be in their 100's these days. Any parent who has a child could be dead before their children grows up. Granted that the grandmother is at a risky age, she may outlive the child. We don't know the future. I do know that I don't live in the woman's house or pay her bills. As long as she can provide everything that child needs, I feel she should be allowed the chance to be a mother. Thank you.

Answer 8

I say more power to her. If she is emotionally/physically and financially capable of caring for them, then it isn't anyone else's business.

Granted, she is going to age (like everyone else) as her kids get older and she might die and miss a lot, but I am sure she has probably thought all of that out too. I think every woman should be able to experience the birth of a child if they want to.

Besides, just because she is going to die one day and miss parts of her kids' lives, doesn't mean she shouldn't be a mother. I could die tomorrow and never seen my kids graduate high school. Life happens. You shouldn't put things on hold because of your age.

I think it is sad that she had to lie in order to be able to go to the clinic.

Answer 9

I do think it is way too old in fact I think once you are past 40 it is a bit old to be having children you have to think about how long you are going to be able to be around for your kids. Yes I know accidents happen and I could die tomorrow leaving my four year old daughter behind but I also think about the Downs Syndrome rates that go up when you get older and just being able to do all the things you want to do with your kids so yes 67 is far too old to bring a child into the world.

Answer 10

I think it's just an example of how selfish people in soceity have become, people only think about themselves and refuse to see the bigger picture. I'm 36 and my half sister is 11. My dad is 62 and everyone thinks he's her grandad. He has how asked my children who are 13,14 + 16 to stop calling him grandad in public, so they go one better than that and call my half sister aunty, but it's true! she is their auntie. I wish people would think outside the box and see the bigger picture.