I began an uncommitted casual sex relationship with someone about two months ago, but things between us have simmered down recently, and I'm not sure whether, when I see him today, I should tell him that I don't think we should continue having sex before or after we actually have sex. Bear in mind that things between us are very casual and we basically only met so that we could sleep with each other. If this were any sort of committed relationship, I'd immediately know to not tell him after sex, but considering the way we met, I'm not sure what's appropriate. What do you think?
2007-01-30 01:50:37 · 49 answers · asked by Amy 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Do what you feel is right. The best answer is to tell him that can't keep seeing him before sex, this will be the last time you will meet. If it is truly casual, then he will (begrudgingly) go along with it but you still will get your one last "Hurrah".
2007-01-30 01:56:07 · answer #1 · answered by Mr. Smooth 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I kinda know how you feel, casual encounters are kinda great at the time, and you feel that you can handle it, but deep down there is that nagging feeling that its not quite right and its not the whole ticket, my advise is take your mind off him, look to finding someone else, its only going to effect you if you let it play on your mind, sounds like you are getting a little hung up because he hasn't paid you any attention lately, sounds like you like this guy maybe more than you think, which is going to lead down the path of hurt. If you think you are falling for this guy, and he doesn't want a more stable relationship its best to cut it now and move on. If you can handle the casualness of it, then just take it as and when it happens, try not to base your life around "the next encounter" otherwise it will just screw your head up.
2007-01-30 21:41:30 · answer #2 · answered by greatdane 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should see him one last time and see the way you feel after sex. Then decide for sure the way you truly feel. Things have probably only simmered down because its no longer new. Just realize that if you move on to another partner the same thing will happen again after a while. My suggestion is to not see this person as often so you can build up a desire to be with him.
2007-01-30 01:56:28 · answer #3 · answered by kdm615 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The fact that urs is not a committed relationship overrules appropriateness. It all comes down to what you want at that moment. It's a casual relationship, u can sleep with him or not. Though it sounds like u like the sex. Cuz if u din't u'd be out of the door.
2007-01-30 02:10:30 · answer #4 · answered by nocirpac 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can have sex with anyone. Find someone that is going to be there for more than just sex. Sex only lasts for a short time, then you will obviously want to move on, as the relationship will just stay in one place, and not evolve. Tell him now!
2007-01-30 04:01:56 · answer #5 · answered by Cute Stuff 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I thought about how I would feel in his position and I think that if I found out before hand, any disappointment I would feel at losing a good booty call would be made a little better by getting laid after I found out it would be my last time. Also, telling him afterward might make it seem like you weren't happy with the sex and that you were essentially like "Ok thats it. The sex sucks. That was your last chance and you blew it." I would go for telling him before.
2007-01-30 01:58:12 · answer #6 · answered by Chris D 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Before sex for sure. If you do it after, he might not take you seriously. I wouldn't. Just tell him right away, how you feel and that at this point, you're not interested in the casual sex anymore. Do not let him change your mind though! Walk away!
2007-01-30 01:57:56 · answer #7 · answered by panthrchic 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him before. its more effective so that he knows you really serious and dont go on to sleep with him after that. if you tell him after then he will jus treat it as a guilt conscience confusing you. if I was him, in my mind i'd be like,'' this chik abviously thought it over before she came to see me but still went on to shag, she jus feeling a lil guilty and dirty, I'll give her some reassuring words to guarantee my next f*uck, Who she think she is? she can just shut me off like that, let me show her what i am made off, I want to punish her on the next encounter''. And he will give it to you so good the next time, you will be addicted to his d*ck and lord help your soul, I dont know how long it will take you move out of the casual relationship. So the last time you shagged, let it be the last, if you serious at this decision
2007-01-30 02:13:01 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think if it is casual...he will just say "alright" and go on his way and not give it to much thought either way.
He may, however, be a little disappointed that he bothered getting together with you to be told that.
It really depends if you want to one last time or you don't. If it is casual, you really don't have to concern yourself with diappointing him.
Why don't you just call him up and say, that there is really no point in meeting because you think the sex is done for you.
Why bother meeting him at all?
2007-01-30 01:56:49 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would tell him before having sex with him, just so things don't become awkward after you guys are done. His ego will definitely be hurt either way, but he may take the reason you want to stop is because of something he did. It would better in the long run if you tell him before, for everyone in general.
2007-01-30 01:56:21 · answer #10 · answered by Chrystal 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋