should i go ahead and have a baby.?

Question

i know that we cant aford it right now, because i dont have a job, but my boy friend works at speedy lube. if i wait to get a desent job, and save for a house. all be to old to have children, theres this other guy that likes me but i dont really like him that way, but he has more money than my boy friend does,and his family is well off. should i go with him. are should i just stick with my boy friend now i no it would be hard but the wellfare system would help me out if we wanted to have a baby wouldint they pay for the doctor bills and stuff, because i dont think my boy friend could make that kind of money puting the oil in cars.

Answer 1

Your boyfriend ought to put some oil where your brain is supposed to be. Of all the selfish irresponsible reasons. You want to have a child just because you want to; never mind having a decent way to raise it. You can't even decide who you want to have the kid fathered by. Sure, trap some guy that you have no real feelings for just because he has money. Bet you his family would really welcome having you around. You sound like the worst type of manipulating bimbo. A real gold digger! Then you're considering welfare? This poor child doesn't stand a chance. Your whole scheme reeks of deception and is totally absurd. With your lame attitude and moral indecency having a child has got to be the last thing you should have on your mind right now.

Answer 2

I have no idea how old you are but you sound very immature.
You should have a baby because you are in a relationship with a man that you love so much you want to share a child with him!
Having a baby with a man simply because he makes more money that your current boyfriend is selfish and only proves that you are not ready to have a child.
Raising a child is not a game and children are not prizes or toys!
Grow up... go to school, get a job, learn what love really is and then get married to a man that you are truly in love with.
Then and only then should you even consider having a child.
You do not deserve to have a child right now.
And it is idiots like you that go around reproducing just because they think that having a bay would be neat because they think that the welfare system will hold them up, that put so much stress on that system that it is not there for the people that truly need it!
Does your boyfriend have any idea how selfish you are?

Answer 3

Are you mad! It takes more than money. You obviously have never had a baby before. A big part is the way you feel about the father. It sounds to me that you don't love this one with the money. It could very well have a impact on the way you treat your baby. If the one that is earnng less money is the one you love, you should stay with him. Maybe it would help if you got a job as well. You don't say whether you love him or not, or how old you both are. Take another think about this because it does'nt just involved the three of you. There is a baby to consider, and they know more than you think they do.

Answer 4

I just had a baby daughter and it is an amazing experience!!! I would strongly encourage u to go for it BUT please please marry your boyfriend 1st. If you guys cannot be serious and committed to marriage, then u are not ready for a child. As for the other guy, if you do not love him, then don't go for him even if he is rich cos' this is a lifetme matter. And I hope u realise that it is not just the 2 of you but your child that we are also talking about. You seem more concerned with the financial aspects and while that is important, there are other important issues that you must resolve. U must ask yourself the question, which is, whether the man in question is the one that you would want to be the father of your child. There is a saying, that goes, if God gives you a child, he will take care of him/her - so don't worry too much about the finances. Talk to the man, marry him, maybe u also get a job now, plan out the finances and both of you must be mentally ready, then perhaps in a year's time, you can have yr baby - the finances will work itself out.

Answer 5

Boy you have some really difficult questions and are obviously confused. So first consider...if you have a baby...who do you want the father to be? That person should be the one who helps you raise your child, will be there for them no matter what. And what kind of parents do you want your child to have. Ones that are dependent on the welfare system, or ones that are able to work together to bring up their child? You see...the amount of money isn't what really counts...It doesn't take a house to raise a child, or a lot of money...but it does take two responsible and ready parents. So my advice is...take the time you need to be a responsible self-supporting adult and marry the man that will work with you to plan for your child....you don't have to be rich or have a lot of money....you do need to be able to work together first in planning for your child's best. Do you need some education....get it. Does your boy friend need to improve his training...help him do it. Waiting pays off...and so does work.
Don't settle for less and you'll be glad you did! You'll also be surprised that it doesn't take as long as you think when you're working towards an important goal like a better life.

Answer 6

No.

a) do you honestly want to raise a baby on welfare? Don't you think your child deserves more than that?

b) you're sounding confused about the whole 'love vs. security' thing. If you're asking these types of questions, you shouldn't have a baby.

c) don't have a baby for self-gratification or because you feel you're biological clock ticking.

If you still want a baby, apply for some financial aid, attend college and work in a lucrative field, e.g. healthcare. Not only could you afford to take care of the baby, but you might meet a classmate who's willing to put some roots down too. Either that or do some serious soul searching.

Answer 7

You don't have to own a house to have a baby, but I would think the least you'd want to make sure of is that you will be able to care for the child yourself, without the support of welfare (which is just incredibly selfish to rely on ahead of time--that's no example to be setting for your kid!). It doesn't sound to me as though you are in any position to have a child, and as much as you might want one, you need to earn that right, in my opinion. To put it another way--you have every legal right to have a child, but you do not have the moral right to force others to pay for that child, and you certainly do not have the moral right to bring a child into the world when you have no way of taking care of it in a responsible manner. If that means you don't get to have a child, I'm sorry, really, but just because we want something doesn't mean we are entitled to it. If you're really serious about this, and you're old enough for this to be a real concern, I'd say, get a job, use the money to freeze some of your eggs, and keep working to establish yourself until you can have a kid and take care of it on your own, without forcing the rest of us to pay for it.

Answer 8

first off how old are you? you should concentrate on going to college/trade school, something of the sort and bettering yourself. You shouldn't have to rely on WELFARE. I'm not saying there is anything wrong with it, I think it's a great thing to help those that need it, why not? Hell in this day and age we treat animals better than we treat each other! But you said it yourself, you don't have a job, so your first step should be just getting a job! DO SOMETHING WITH YOUR LIFE! Even if it's working at McDonald's, it's a job! It'll put money in your pocket and food on the table!

Answer 9

You're debating on which guy would be best to impregnate you??

Wtf??

I feel bad for whichever guy you DO choose.

I hope the guy wants to have kids and you aren't trapping him.

It sounds like you don't really love either. I think love plays a huge part in making this thing work with a guy. You're looking entirely about money and not thinking about all the problems you'll create in the process. How can you tell your baby someday that you chose it's father by how much money he had? I feel sorry for all parties involved in this.

You should want to have a baby with a man because you love him and you want to share your lives together with something you created. NOT because he has money and you're being selfish about having a baby.

THE END

Answer 10

First become responsible for yourself. What happens if your bf leaves you? You can't pay the rent for yourself let alone for a baby. You don't really want to ruin your body with stretch marks and a saggy tummy just because you are worried you'll be too old later. Enjoy being young and having the choice of two guys and not a choice of cleaning the diaper or spit up first.