This to me, seems wrong; you shouldn't have to choose between your children and your spouse. But suppose you did; suppose you believed this ideology. If you were previously married, and the child came first, wouldn't it make sense to put the child first (at least at the beginning, and then treat the needs of everyone equally?) Please, no crazy liberal answers, I just want honest, real, feelings. Thank you.
2007-01-29 17:01:36 · 24 answers · asked by 123 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
My denomination teaches the same principles and I agree with them. It's not a matter of choosing between your children and your spouse. The marriage occurs first, then the children come along [at least that how it's supposed to occur]. People are actually better parents when they put a higher priority on the marriage. The marriage forms a bedrock...a foundation for the children to grow in a stable, loving home. Placing the child first can allow cracks to form in that foundation and possibly destroy the very environment he/she needs so desperately. You will always be a parent and you will never stop loving your child but they are only yours for a short season. Then, in the natural progression of life, they move on to start their own life and family. You don't choose your spouse over your children. It's simply a recognition that children benefit most from parents who have a loving relationship. It also creates an example of how to find happiness in their own relationship when they find a life partner as well.
2007-01-29 17:20:01 · answer #1 · answered by desi 2 · 3⤊ 2⤋
ideally, if things are done in God's order then , yes,, this is how it should be. Our children will grow up, leave us- we raise them to be independent of us - they are a part of us but they are eventually seperate and independent.
Our spouses are to be one flesh with us- it is too easy to get out of agreement with our spouses and for one child and a parent to gang up on the other parent and bring division to a relationship that should have been there before the children came and should still be standing strong when the children are gone. The children are important- their safety and care is of utmost importance but hte relationship should not take priority over the relationship to the spouse- children need to learn to honor and respect marriage and they learn this through learning to honor, respect and uphold their parents marriage.
In a situation where the life and safety of one parent or the children is in danger at the hands of the other parent, measures should be taken to seperate from that situation and the saftey of the children takes precedence over everything else
discernment should be used however and in a healthy marriage, time is spent and the marriage relationship is worked on and cultivated as most important- it is only when the parents are taking their roles seriously, operate as one and are healthy together that they can raise healthy , confident, happy and independently able children. Children should never be allowed to playo ne parent against the other, to manipulate parents to their own whims or to bring division between the parents in any way. The marriage relationship is meant to last far beyond the raising of children and if it is not held as most important under your relationship with God, it will falter.
2007-01-29 17:30:26 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not sure what religion is that. The Bible does not teach a specific order.
Principllay as taught from the Bible, God should be First, then the Body of Christ, then Your Family, the Others, then Self. BUT DONT" NEGLECT YOURSELF!
Yes I believe you should treat everyone in your family equally. Your LOVE will vary for different family members however. I mean you don't love your husband in the same way you love your children.
2007-01-29 17:06:35 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Suppose your husband decided to join a cult. I mean a whack job, let's-go-hide-in-the-bunker-and wait for-the UFO cult. Would you want to put your spouse then?
A lot of psychologists think children in our society are spoiled because we put them first to often.
Why would putting God first cause your children and husband grief, anyway? All God wants you to do is love each other. If you're doing his will, and there doing His will, what's the problem?
2007-01-29 17:08:52 · answer #4 · answered by The Notorious Doctor Zoom Zoom 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have seen in my life so many woman treat there boy-friends or husbands like Gods. Unfortunatly, All humans will let you down eventully because they can't be there all the time.
In order for you to stay strong for you and your children you must have your streanth in a higher power. And understand that a partner is going to think of there interests first and so should you. If a woman chases a man it shows weakness. And you might regret your actions suposed to staying strong with faith and love with your higher power
2007-01-29 17:22:34 · answer #5 · answered by simonralphatwork 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nicely, the "appropriate" family contributors is the place the youngsters belong to the two mum and dad and the mother and dad are appropriate and the youngsters are appropriate.... The married couple are one flesh and in God's eyes could placed one yet another in first place (after God), notably different human relationships. yet in spite of the undeniable fact that- this courting should not be abused. A determine additionally has the duty of shielding their babies from harm. whilst it includes step-babies and the thank you to manage self-discipline, that is a real complicated concern, distinctly the place the mother and dad do no longer agree on a thank you to bypass approximately it and the youngsters take earnings of this and attempt to pit their mum and dad against one yet another. Vot won't attempt to play marriage counselor right here, and sorry touching directly to the way issues have grew to become out.
2016-11-23 13:29:03 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Spouse and children the same as they are both part of family. God does not even make the list.
2007-01-29 17:08:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
It should go: Children first, spouses second, and Gods third.
2007-01-29 18:18:30 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ooops... crazy liberal here, but I'll give you a real answer.
If you are not willing to follow your religion to the letter, then perhaps you need to find a different denomination that fits your life and your beliefs better. My mom converted from Lutheran to Catholicism for that very reason and she's much happier.
My own real feelings are family first (all of them lumped together), world second, myself third. I have no need to try to please a fictional being... so notice I don't have Santa in the list, either. :-)
2007-01-29 17:13:38 · answer #9 · answered by Rogue Scrapbooker 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
God should always come first because that is the only thing that matters in the end.
Sure, your children and spouse are very important, meaninful parts of your life --- but think abot who/what gave you such blessed things?
GOD.
2007-01-29 17:08:36 · answer #10 · answered by ♥ Scorpio X 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋