i've had three different girls on dates, and the date goes fine, but when we start talking about personal stuff, and it comes up that i have a daughter full time. Then bam, they start going backwards. One told me that she wants to go through having a first child with someone who hasn't went through it yet, like it would be better. I don't get it!
2007-01-29 14:56:13 · 13 answers · asked by BLAINE 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
sometimes girls just get scared about a guy having a kid.....it means that the girl has someone to compete with for your time. I personally do not care if a guy has a kid....i think its sweet that you are raising your daughter alone. i give props to you...i hope things work out for you. If you ever need someone to chat with go ahead and shoot me an e-mail!!!
2007-01-29 15:02:13 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should be upfront about it before going on the date, then you won't be in for any nasty suprises.
I date quite a lot, and I wouldn't date a father because I think the level of commitment to a parent is much higher than with someone else. With a single guy, I can go on a few dates, see him casually and I can pull out whenever I want.
With a father, it's not so easy to extricate yourself from the relationship bc you will have formed an attachment to their child and would be concerned about damaging and upsetting the child by leaving. Also, I think I would fall in love with the child and not be able to say goodbye to the little chunka, even if the relationship with the father was terrible.
Also, in terms of lifestyle and responsibility there's a huge difference. When you have a kid at home, you won't be staying out until 10am at a club and there's a lot less spontaneity.
Lastly, someone who is a parent is indefinitely absolutely linked back to the other parent regardless of the health of the relationship. I just don't think people are wanting the complication and drama of having the other woman in their life.
I am sure that there are a lot of girls who will be understanding about your situation and even find it admirable and attractive, and similarly, I am sure that there are a lot of single mothers who you could date. I think the important thing is to be honest and upfront about disclosing this information when you meet someone.
Best of luck to you and your child.
2007-01-29 23:08:46 · answer #2 · answered by Snow White 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi Blaine:
First I want to say that I am very proud of you and much more that you are proud of your little one. Alot of guys that I would go out in my pass would hide their children..So if they do that to one of their own then what could be of me...But you sound like a guy who gots it going on..Someone will come your way, don't push yourself and before you know it bam. Try a little prayer now and then, just make sure she is not a fake and trying to get you and not your child. Any questions you can E mail me.....Dee
2007-01-29 23:04:38 · answer #3 · answered by Dee 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old are these women?
I think that you being a responsible man would be a turn on.
The fact that you are having these problems so soon is a good thing. You know that they are not ready for responsibility. They are not right for you.
Keep trying...Don't give up there is a woman out there for you and when you find her, she will cherish the fact that you are taking care of your daughter.
Best of luck
2007-01-29 23:03:16 · answer #4 · answered by Jalyn24 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some females just aren't ready to handle being a parent to someone elses' child. Don't worry about it, u will find one woman that doesn't give a damn. U r better of without those women anyway, becuz they didn't even give ur daughter a chance.
2007-01-29 23:01:44 · answer #5 · answered by 2good4hem 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
To be completely honest with you.............those women are azzholes,b/c when i first got with my husband 9 years ago,he had a previous marriage and they had 3 kids together,they was divorce for 2years when we got together.....the kids at that time was 9,7 and 5 years old.We get alone great SOMETIMES,but what relationship doesn't have their ups and downs..LOL Now we have a 8 year old son together and at times YES it is hard with the older kids,but i just take it day by day and one day at a time......the way i look at it is;IF YOU LOVE THAT PERSON RATHER THEY HAVE KIDS OR NOT YOU WILL LOVE AND CHERISH HIM/HER AND LOVE THEM FOR WHO/WHAT THEY ARE! I hope this will help you out a little.....IF they can't accept you and your child you DON'T need them in ya`lls life hon.
Take care and have a great night.
Brandy
2007-01-29 23:17:58 · answer #6 · answered by bambi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that others like to not be incountered in a family fashion, with those who are not family (take son and mother inlaw for example). There are women who can put a petty difference like that aside, it will just take time to meet one worth your time. Not many men can be a single dad and do it well, please be one of the few.
2007-01-29 23:01:15 · answer #7 · answered by §†reet R¥dA 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well they feel like they r gonna have a responsibility of taking care of ur daughter and they might think that ur daughter is out of control. try dating single women who already have a child just like u.
2007-01-30 00:25:27 · answer #8 · answered by rko3943 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most girls (not grown women) are not interested in someone who has kids simply because they don't want the hassle or the competition. Pretty shallow but normal for teenagers.
2007-01-29 23:02:17 · answer #9 · answered by Poohcat1 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are dating girls, maybe its time to start dating real WOMEN. You will find someone that accepts the fact that you are a father. Hopefully a women that will accept your daughter, good luck!
2007-01-29 23:01:03 · answer #10 · answered by Waythere 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋