I posted this question before but I did not get good answers. I know this guy for about 4 months and each months passes, our relationship gets stronger. The questions is what kind of relationship that I have with this guy? We call each other everyday, he comes to my apartment at least once a week and he stays for hours. Nothing happened between us, we just talk, eat, and listen to music. We sometimes hang out with others friends but he does not show that he is interested in me. The question is, how come that he spends hours in my place and he is not interested? I'm so confused and I don't know how to deal with it. I need an answer from someone who knows what he is talking about. And oh, I am a good looking woman, and he told me so before.
2007-01-29 14:06:28 · 19 answers · asked by Laila 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
This guy is not shy at all, by the way. He is very confident and charismatic.
2007-01-29 14:30:14 · update #1
Don't push. Sounds like he just needs a friend. If he feels something he will let you know. Four months is not a really long time. Just relax. Or get him drunk.
2007-01-29 14:11:35 · answer #1 · answered by ARM 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe this guy is the exception and can easily handle a platonic relationship with the opposite sex. But here's the deal:
If you are comfortable with the status quo or want to wait this guy out, then there is nothing wrong with just being friends for now.
Maybe there is still something about you that stops his advances before they begin. Surely you guys must discuss relationships, and hopefully you tell the truth about being ready and available for the right guy. If you've planted a false impression that you arent interested or just too happy being single, then you need to come clean.
If you can't stand waiting, you can take the chance and bring up the subject at your next get-together, but then you risk losing what you have now.
I vote for patience. Take lots of cold showers and value your friendship with him.
Final note added: Don't push yourself into trying to categorize your friendship into a specific relationship category. Enjoy your friendship.
2007-01-29 22:19:41 · answer #2 · answered by snvffy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry am not a guy, but thought I'd chime in my thought. If he hasn't made a move on u, or given u Some *vibe* that he wants to be physically close to u, then I'd begin wondering if he is attracted to you, unless he is really shy and is wondering what "you" think bout him. Being goodlooking does not always mean we feel attracted to the person. Some of my friends tell me I am attractive, but they are just friends. Are you both still kinda *formal* with each other? Do u still feel that u r still not totally comfortable in each others presence. If so, then give it more time.
He certainly likes you. It's a great beginning. Sit close to him and see what happens. If u really like him, u can let him know that very subtly..like a lil look into his eyes (u know that deep look), or a slight touch on his arm. But the rest is upto him, unless u wanna make a really bold move. But in that case, u hv to be ready for the consequences and possible awkwardness, if he is not on the same page as u.
2007-01-29 22:21:47 · answer #3 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm offering this as a possibility, may or may not be your situation. I had a female friend that I spent a lot of time with, but only as a good friend. We did not have physical relationship in any way, and I spent the night at her house, on the couch, on occasion. I think she wanted to have more of a relationship, but I was not attracted to her in that way. That said, I very much enjoyed her company as a good friend. She is interesting, attractive, and has a great sense of humor, but it's just not there for me to be more than friends. I like to date different people, and am not wanting a steady relationship. I wish you the best and hope this helps.
2007-01-29 22:26:49 · answer #4 · answered by jivemee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he's not sure if you are into him or not.He could be thinking you two are just hanging out for fun.He told you that you are good looking so obviously the physical attraction is there.It could also be that he is getting mixed signals from you,or he is "reading" you wrong.I would suggest having a conversation about it.If you are nervous about what he might say,try the "what would you do/say if...." it might help break the ice and get some answers you are looking for.Good luck
2007-01-29 22:20:51 · answer #5 · answered by rockman 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok,I'm not male,lol,but I still want to answer this.Is it possible that he's just interested in you as a FRIEND?? It's either he likes you as a friend,a platonic one,or he's gay. Perhaps you should come out and ask him,since you seem to say you're "relationship" is getting stronger,yet you say he's showing he's not interested in you,SO,one cannot have a one-sided relationship,hon,it does take two last check. ASK him,it's just going to drive you crazy,or ask a mutual friend what the deal is.
2007-01-29 22:14:41 · answer #6 · answered by dragonfly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no such thing as a guy and a girl being just friends. the only way, that, this is possible, is that he is truely gay. i promise dear, every guy you have ever met, has or is trying to get in your pants. its not you, it is a guy thing. i am being honest with you because i do not know you. i will never meet you so i can tell you this. if you go and ask a guy he will deny this, because he is trying to get in your pants. yes even the married ones. This guy may just be very shy,he my be scared to make a move. Let him know how you feel.you make the first move
2007-01-29 22:25:49 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he just likes being your friend, and hanging out with you, and talking to you. Just because a guy comes to your house and hangs out all the time and calls you does not mean he wants to date you. And to say your good looking what does that mean? That all guys should want you (no disrespect).! Anyways what I am trying to say is some guys do think with their brain and not their *****!
2007-01-29 22:17:03 · answer #8 · answered by Boondocksaint 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I asked my boyfriend for you...He says that he likely is interested, he's just too shy and insecure to make the first move, so, make the first move and see where it goes from there! But START slow, like trying to hold his hand, a back rub, and see how he reacts. Make sure you make it clear that you are interested in him! Good luck! I got a good man and you can to!
2007-01-29 22:24:15 · answer #9 · answered by citygirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it sounds like this dude is probably interested in you, hes just too much ofa pansy to make the first move.....i suggest if you want to start a realtionship with this guy,,youd better give him some pretty obvious hints. And if hes still too chicken to make a move forget about him.. Ratt
2007-01-29 22:16:14 · answer #10 · answered by Ratt 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋