my girlfriend has a problem?

Question

she's schizophrenic, bipolar, and depressed. there are days when she's convinced that I'm going to KILL her. if i tell her to close her eyes, that i have a suprise for her, she'll think i have a knife or a gun. i know she cuts herself (legs) and its just hard for her to get up in the morning. It's hard for me too. I love her. But it's hard to take. Can I do better than this?

Answer 1

It sounds like you are discovering that love does not solve all problems.

Look, your girlfriend has some deep seated psychological issues that you are not capable of dealing with. That is alright, you are not a doctor. You need to go to your girlfriends family if one is available and describe the symptoms that are occurring. If the family is like her, contact your family doctor or her Psychiatrist (the name and number should be on the pill bottles). Immediately report her behavior. If necessary and you think she may cause harm to herself or others call the police and get her committed for an evaluation.

Then when you have done your duty, decide that you need to look after yourself and not play nursemaid all of your life to someone that really needs help.

Good luck to you.

Answer 2

Wow...I can't answer your question "can I do better than this?" because it's obvious that of course, you can find somebody without all of these problems.

Because you're asking this question, it seems more like you're trying to weigh whether or not you should go and find somebody else. The previous answer is good...somebody like this needs a higher purpose and possibly also has a physical chemical imbalance...but, since I don't know you or her, just being boyfriend/girlfriend is not a serious commitment to me to put up with this level of craziness. A more pertinent question would be how much do you love her for a commitment? Would you be responsible for her for the rest of your life? Based on what you said; she's convinced you're going to kill her sometimes...she may have some feelings for you, but clearly she doesn't trust you at all.

Bottom line...if you're really committed to her, try to get her some real help...there are therapists and doctors

if you're just sticking with her in the 'rescue her' mentality, thinking she'll be grateful to you if you stay with her...or if you are only staying with her because you think you can't find somebody better (you have low self-esteem)...then you should just get out of the relationship and take a breather...step back and re-evaluate the situation. If she doesn't trust you now, it might be due to physical problems like you listed, but it might not...it won't get any better...can you live with that?

Answer 3

You're in a tough situation and I empathize. You don't say if she's getting any professional help or not but that would be a good place to start if she's not. There is medical help for her situation and that could make a world of difference in her and in your relationship.

Regardless, you need a professional to talk to for your own benefit and a place to go for advice on how best to deal with the situation. Check out the National Alliance on Mental Illness (http://www.nami.org/) and attend some of their local meetings. Once you've exhausted every avenue for help, you can decide for yourself if you want to stay in the relationship...you're the only one that can know. If you don't try, you'll always wonder if you did the right thing or not but remember, you have to take care of yourself and you deserve to be happy. Sometimes, it's better to cut your losses before it's too late.

I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 4

Is she not on medications? They work wonders but the day she does'nt take them her symptoms come rushing back and she can become extremly violent you need to watch her you can't help who you love man but if you have no feelings for this girl get away asap she will do nothing but make you a nervous wreck and maybe a little paranoid yourself.If you do love her and she don't take her meds right you or another responsible person should see to it that she does and maybe it may help you to talk with a counsler to see what you are in for it may not want to be the road you want to take in life.Just remember she cannot help it so don't be confrontational with her she can be dangerous to you as well as you or others.Take care and good luck whatever you decide.

Answer 5

This is a hard road to walk. It don't go away but can be better with the help of a doctor. You should also go with her so you can best know how to help her & yourself.
If you want to know if you can do better than this person I"m sure you can.
You can not fix her. Get her to a doctor & fast.

Answer 6

Werll saying can I do better than this is a little harsh. I know youlove her and want to move on but if you really love her you need to find her help she is acing so serious issues imange ifyou left her without helping her she would be dead do you want to live with that for the rest of our life? Think about it

Answer 7

I'm sorry to say this, Nini. But there is nothing you can do for her until she decides to help herself. You can write her a letter or tell her that you are afraid for her. But after that, you will have to protect yourself.

I used to date a young man with similar problems. And about the last sane thing he did in his life was to call off our engagement.

Answer 8

it is not a matter of doing better...you should try to get her into a program that can help her. there is also a show on A&E called intervention...i am not saying go on there and show your business however there are support groups and mental centers that you could contact to find out the best way to help instead of on here. good luck with her but don't give up unless she has then there may be no way for you to help her she will have to WANT to help herself. best wishes from indiana

Answer 9

As much as you love her you have to think of your own wellbeing. She needs to be on meds, and you need to think - is this is how you always want you life to be? You have to remember that it's okay to think of yourself sometimes. Her mental health is not her fault, but if if she loves you she'll want whats best for both of you, and seek help. My partner has a major mental health problem, and I love her so we're making progress together. You need to decide what suits you.

Answer 10

she feels lost and useless. i think you must make her feel worthy and special. she doesn't trust anyone i suppose. try gaining her trust. DO what she pleases. I dont know y, but i feel she must have had some incident in her life which made her feel so. it will be better if you give her a feeling of being her saviour or someone to protect her. She should feel safe in your hands. once you gain her trust it would be better if you took her for counciling to boost her spirit.

Hope she feels bettre soon.