Trusting him at other school!?

Question

ok so i have been with my boyfriend for 3yrs and so now he is moving away and 2 a new school soon. Last night we talked on the phone and talk about it,and he said that he loves me and isn't studdin those girls at the new school he about to go to. also that he isn't gonna let 3yrs go to waste just because he is moving. my problem is that i dnt really believe him when he said he wouldn't be studdin those girls at his new school and stuff(shoot he mess withed my friends at the school he goes to now)! im worried that he will and i believe he will... i feel bad that i feel that way though. what do u think i should do? would u just break up or would u try to work things out or do u think we can work things out! also if u believe that it can't be worked out how do i get ova him and move on?Also he says since he got this new phone he has to talk to me until 10:00 on school nights! thanks for the advice!

Answer 1

The very first time he cheated on you, you should have broken up with him. I would have given him one more chance, but then that's it. 2 strikes and you're out with me. If he's moving to another school, yes, he will cheat on you. No doubt about it. Anyway, it's hard to get over someone you've been with for three years, but you can do much better. You could try getting a new hobby, joining a volunteer group, accomplish goals, and of course, find someone new to get over him. Good luck! :)

Answer 2

If you've been together 3 years, he's an unusually loyal boy. If he talks to you for hours on the phone, he's an unusually loyal boy. Loyal boys are rare and hard to find, so leave things the way they are. If he says he loves you, leave it at that. The fastest way to lose ANY boy is to give him ideas about cheating, that he never would have thought of if you didn't bring it up.

As for 'working things out' there's nothing TO work out. He loves you, and that's more than most guys will ever get. Just be your normal me-and-my-boyfriend self, and stop worrying so much about what MIGHT happen. Live in the here-and-now.

And if it makes you feel better, here are a few tips on boys/men. First off, they're not deep thinkers like girls/women. They talk in short sentence most of the time, cause that's how males talk to other males. Also, if you ask them what they're thinking, and they say 'nothing' they're telling the truth. They're just sort of zoned out. If a girl/woman says 'talk to me' , guys normally don't know what you mean, because guys talk AT each other, not TO each other, and they assume girls/women communicate the same way. We don't... but t hey don't know that. And the last tip is that guys don't take hints. They don't know what a hint is, and they don't know what you're thinking. Males just aren't deep... they're not complex, complicated creatures like girls/women are.

Answer 3

Long distance relationships are brutally tough, especially if you have either already begun physical intimacy, or if there is a realistic opportunity for it to develop with others while apart.

3 years is a long time to be together, but if you won't be seeing each other every few days, then eyes will wander. And not just his. You will start to feel the same lack of companionship that you both enjoyed together.

If he has a history of cheating, end it now. If he's just flirted up your friends with banter, that's different.

Either way, you have a long and uncertain road in front of you. If you are already suspicous, that feeling is just going to eat at you until you start to make accusations that may or may not be true.

Personally, I'd agree to see other people, and try to stay friends.

Answer 4

You have kinda answered your own questions. If he has messed with your friends here in your presence, I believe that he will probably be doing some studying at his new school. Long distance relationships do work but it takes both parties. Wait and see what happens or if you are really not feeling his love I would just move on.

Answer 5

I think deep down in your heart, you already know the answer ......
And I'd like to reassure you, you've made the right one!
If I were in your shoes, here's what I'd do: I'd ignore my heart for the moment and be true/honest to myself, allowing only my conscience to be my guide and do some serious thinking. We both know that all the positive(s) about you/him and your relationship, is no problem, whatsoever. But, instead, it's the negative habits/traits of his and the downside of the relationship, you need to give serious consideration to. All it takes is just one negative habit or trait of his to threaten you with emotional pain/anguish (distrusting someone causes emotional anguish) to reconsider terminating the relationship, for the sake of your happiness and peace of mind. Sooner or later, you're gonna get fed-up with the lack of trust, anyway, so why allow yourself to become more attached to him, emotionally, which will only deepen your pain that will come with the break-up?! Terminating a relationship is never pleasant nor tickles, but, with healthy support you can overcome the grief and move on! Kindness and respect, when communicating your desire to break-up, will help. He may try to convince you differently (expect it), but be STRONG!!
It's time you think of YOU, because YOU deserve better, Hon!

Answer 6

ok let me say this first.... if you dont trust him after 3yrs is it true love? i have been with my bf for 7 yrs now and we wet to different schools the whole time we were together and i trusted him completely but if you were to break up then the easiest way to get over him is to find someone else or just go out and have fun with your girls...

Answer 7

ok well i think you should cut him cause if he was messin with your own friends, why would you think he wouldn't mess with other girls? but i dont think you should as k other people it's up to you. and he cant call u till 10:00 i think that's total BS but its realli up to u, do u love him? do u trust him? if it's no then u should let him go , because i think every girl should have a man she trusts and loves and if it's yes then try to work it out i hope that i really helped u out!

Answer 8

He could be just a flirt like me. I always flirt with my friends and few other people. But I let them know I have a fiance. I only orally flirt and give out hugs, thats it. If he does more than that, then you need to break up or tell him what is acceptable to you.

That is to say while I flirt with alot of girls, there is only one girl I will be with and no other.

Answer 9

Guys are all the same and i know because im one of them. If you really love him stay with him but not too long from now you are going to be cheated on. plus if he really loved you why would he move?

Answer 10

IF YOU TRULY LOVE SOMEONE YOU ARE WILLING TO DO ANY AND EVERY THING TO KEEP THEM LOVIONG YOU, AND IN SOME CASES THAT MEANS SACRAFICS THINGS YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD NOT GO WITHOUT. HEY LOVE IS A VERY STRONG EMOTION, AND IF YOU LOVE THIS PERSON THEN YOU SHOULD LOVE THEM FAR OR NEAR, AND PRAY FOR THE BEST FOR THE BOTH OF YOU!